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    #1

    Tail Between the Legs Thread

    I am starting this thread for those of us who have tried and failed and are too embarassed to come here when we`ve made and broken so many promises to ourselves and to our friends here.

    When you find yourself needing MWO but feel like you don`t deserve another chance or feel afraid of the criticism (which rarely happens) you`ll receive, come here. Post here.

    This is the safe place to post to say ``I`m back, even though I said earlier that this was my final quit and, again, I blew it.``

    I don`t want to encourage failure. I want to succeed. I`ve been here for three years with only a couple of AF weeks under my belt.

    This morning I decided, yet again, to stop drinking altogether. It`s my millionth time but the universe has been cooperative in aligning me up to succeed. We`ve said goodbye to our heavy drinking friends (we are almost friendless now... LOL). My daughter-in-law who makes the best caesers (like a bloody mary but canadianized) and starts drinking at the lakehouse at ten a.m. is trying to get pregnant so, has stopped her silliness. I have read some fantastic books lately including Eckhart Tolle`s two, Addiction & Grace, Kick the Drink, etc. Our new batch of wine tastes disgusting ... yay. These are all things that are working in my favour. Oh and another biggie is that we now have internet access at the lake house which is where I need the most support.

    I will come here to post no matter what.

    This thread is here for those of us who feel like we can`t, yet again, proclaim that we are quitting because we are afraid no one will take us seriously.

    The plan:

    I will buy and make delicious non alcohol drinks including hot and cold herbal teas, club soda with splashes of fresh juice, lemon water, etc.

    I will move for at least fifteen minutes daily

    I will come on MWO at least once a day

    I will ask the universe to guide me in my sobriety in order for my true calling in life to be heard with clarity and awakeness.

    I will take responsibility for my sobriety no matter what.

    I will take L-Glut and my other supplements.

    I will live in the present moment, not fret about past mistakes or worry about mine or my kids future. All we really have is NOW... thanks Mr. Tolle.

    Join me and take that tail out from between your legs. Raise it proudly high, give it a shake and join me no matter how often or how severely you`ve failed in the past.

    This thread will be where we meet up when we feel that there`s no where else to go.

    I am, in no way, being critical of the other threads and their contributors. I have found tremendous support here no matter how many times I`ve failed. It`s only ME and my embarrassment and my feelings of inadequacy and failure that prevent me from posting on or starting other threads after yet, another setback.

    Here`s to success!! Here`s to not needing this thread!! :l
    Tipplerette

    I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

    "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
    ? Lao-Tzu
    Tags: None
    #2
    Tail Between the Legs Thread

    Just noticed that i am now a Senior Member... time to set an example for the Newbies, don`t you think....
    Tipplerette

    I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

    "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
    ? Lao-Tzu

    Comment

      #3
      Tail Between the Legs Thread

      Tipplerette;1378021 wrote: Just noticed that i am now a Senior Member... time to set an example for the Newbies, don`t you think....
      That seltzer water with fresh lemons/limes will go a lllllllllong way in helping, not sure what your poison was, but I just sort of pretended it was beer...LOL

      Good luck
      Living on Planet Sober since 05/02/11




      DAREDEVIL COOKIE MONSTER

      Comment

        #4
        Tail Between the Legs Thread

        Tipp :l

        This is is BRILLIANT idea. I have been reading recent posts basically withdrawing from MWO Because of the reasons you just cited. Most of the people slipping characterized their slips, their falls as tail between the legs and I kept thinking to myself- No! That's the wrong image because here we are ALL in the same boat. But what I DIDN'T consider is that people struggling big time are often next to people doing pretty okay or great or a little worse...and that position alone must make it realLy tough to come on the threads and talk about how you may not be doing as great as Mary or Bob in the next row....so to speak.

        So perhaps this can be a sub set of Sorts, specifically geared to those guys and dolls in that same (or thereabouts) position.

        Let's not make it however a place to stay slipped. I know I can get into that mindset because misery as we know loves company ...

        Anyway, so glad to see you back. I'm your biggest fan because you are the one-ready or not- who motivated me to get back into MWO and stay here.

        Plus I want to get invited to the Lake House someday

        :l
        On My Own Way Out Since May 20, 2012
        *If you think poorly of yourself, you can fail with a clear conscience.
        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f11/tool-box-27556.html tool box
        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f19/newbies-nest-30074.html newbie nest

        Comment

          #5
          Tail Between the Legs Thread

          I admire your willingness to keep trying. The old saying is the only way to fail is quit trying.
          A couple of things that really helped me early were

          1.) Forward thinking. If I felt I wanted a drink, I would play the whole scenario in my head to the end and realize I did not want to be hungover, sick, guilty or embarrassed the next day.

          2.) I repeated to myself over and over again, No drinking no matter what. This was a bit difficult sometimes, but it always took the option off the table.

          I also took extra time every morning to be thankful for waking up clear headed and feeling well. My weakness for anything, food and alcohol especially always were at night. I knew if I could make it past the cravings I would appreciate myself 10 fold in the morning.

          Just take it one day at a time. I have learned to do this with not only alcohol but pretty much everything in life. Everything is temporary, we only have to ride out right now.

          Hope this helps.
          AL free since March 17th 2011...loving this life. No drinking no matter what.

          Hi my name is Lori and i am so happy to be here.

          Comment

            #6
            Tail Between the Legs Thread

            Hello Tipppppp & others ... So nice to see you! I have been hesitant too post much for those very reasons ... I think this is a perfect thread.

            So today is Day 11 and Friday ... I have a houseful coming this weekend for 2 birthday parties with overnight guests. I am stressing over this because of the drinking ... if it was smoking it would be easy right? You'd just say I'm quitting smoking, etc. No one would think anything of it, they would be happy and encouraging.

            My thoughts are what am I going to say and do about not drinking. They expect me too drink. What am I going to say? Why is there such a stigma attached to saying I'm not drinking? Everyone will say why not? Bet they won't encourage me .... Such a social stigma attached to drinking ... what am I ging to do??
            Growth means change and change involves risk, stepping from the know to the unknown."
            Author Unknown :h

            AF - Sept 4, 2012
            10 days - Sept 13, 2012
            2 weeks - Sept 17, 2012
            Slip on the weekend but tried too moderate!
            AF - Sept 24, 2012 (get back on the headaches not worth it)
            Slippery slope Oct 1 ..... Trying to not give up!


            ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            Comment

              #7
              Tail Between the Legs Thread

              Good idea for a thread!
              sigpic
              AF since December 22nd 2008
              Real change is difficult, and slow, and messy - Oliver Burkeman

              Comment

                #8
                Tail Between the Legs Thread

                Nelz;1378031 wrote: That seltzer water with fresh lemons/limes will go a lllllllllong way in helping, not sure what your poison was, but I just sort of pretended it was beer...LOL

                Good luck
                Beep.. wrong.. I drink red wine. Or should i say drank. yes drank.
                Tipplerette

                I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

                "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
                ? Lao-Tzu

                Comment

                  #9
                  Tail Between the Legs Thread

                  Kradle123;1378036 wrote: Tipp :l

                  Let's not make it however a place to stay slipped. I know I can get into that mindset because misery as we know loves company ...

                  Anyway, so glad to see you back. I'm your biggest fan because you are the one-ready or not- who motivated me to get back into MWO and stay here.

                  Plus I want to get invited to the Lake House someday

                  :l
                  Hey Kradle, we have a huge place and who knows, maybe I'll have a MWO party here one day. So glad that I helped keep you here once upon a time. I now look upon your for inspiration my friend.

                  This is NOT a place that we want to be. This thread is for people who have no where else to go. I will stay here because i started it but will never judge anyone's slips because i wear the crown of the Queen of Slips... I am looking for a replacement though...

                  My goal is to be successful as always.
                  Tipplerette

                  I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

                  "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
                  ? Lao-Tzu

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Tail Between the Legs Thread

                    red67;1378041 wrote: I admire your willingness to keep trying. The old saying is the only way to fail is quit trying.
                    A couple of things that really helped me early were

                    1.) Forward thinking. If I felt I wanted a drink, I would play the whole scenario in my head to the end and realize I did not want to be hungover, sick, guilty or embarrassed the next day.

                    2.) I repeated to myself over and over again, No drinking no matter what. This was a bit difficult sometimes, but it always took the option off the table.

                    I also took extra time every morning to be thankful for waking up clear headed and feeling well. My weakness for anything, food and alcohol especially always were at night. I knew if I could make it past the cravings I would appreciate myself 10 fold in the morning.

                    Just take it one day at a time. I have learned to do this with not only alcohol but pretty much everything in life. Everything is temporary, we only have to ride out right now.

                    Hope this helps.
                    it helps tremendously, Red, my cravings definitely rear their ugly head at night. My pattern is that i moderate wonderfully for a few days and then I drink to the point of it affecting my sleep pattern and I lay awake at night making new promises to myself. It's gone on for so long now. Playing out that conversation in my head BEFORE I take a drink just might do the trick. Will try that tonight.
                    Tipplerette

                    I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

                    "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
                    ? Lao-Tzu

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Tail Between the Legs Thread

                      bouchard01;1378047 wrote: Hello Tipppppp & others ... So nice to see you! I have been hesitant too post much for those very reasons ... I think this is a perfect thread.

                      So today is Day 11 and Friday ... I have a houseful coming this weekend for 2 birthday parties with overnight guests. I am stressing over this because of the drinking ... if it was smoking it would be easy right? You'd just say I'm quitting smoking, etc. No one would think anything of it, they would be happy and encouraging.

                      My thoughts are what am I going to say and do about not drinking. They expect me too drink. What am I going to say? Why is there such a stigma attached to saying I'm not drinking? Everyone will say why not? Bet they won't encourage me .... Such a social stigma attached to drinking ... what am I ging to do??
                      What I have said lately is "I am taking a break from booze tonight." Period. A touch of honesty might stifle them as you might say "I've been overdoing it lately so I am on the wagon tonight." Everyone can relate to that one. My 'friends' were not accepting of my abstinence and grew bored with me so it was easy to let them go. The last few times they visited the lake house, i spent a lot of time running around keeping the place running while these 'friends' sat and drank my wine. Hmmmmm something definitely wrong with that picture.

                      Stay strong for yourself and you alone. As Jason Vale says, we are ALL in the same place with alcohol, just at different levels. Everyone can relate to needing a break. Later on when you see them again and are still not drinking you could say "I felt so good when I took a break that i don't know if i want to go there again. i don't really need it." That'll get them feeling a little envious although it might come out as criticism or discouragement as their egos will have trouble with it.
                      Tipplerette

                      I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

                      "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
                      ? Lao-Tzu

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Tail Between the Legs Thread

                        Great Idea Tip....

                        I know when I slipped at AF Day 47 it took me three days to post about it on what I call my "Home Thread". Thank God I did as I'm now on AF Day 30 again.

                        I was scared to admit my slip and this thread would have helped me get back to MWO a lot sooner.

                        Thanks for this, it's a great idea and will help many. PPQ

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Tail Between the Legs Thread

                          Hi Tipps,

                          I wanted to pop in and say I am here to offer my support! If I had a dollar for every time I "started over", I wouldn't be sitting at work right now :H

                          So everyone, never feel like you're not worthy of coming back, we are ALL worthy. This is not easy, and if you can't come here and be honest, where can you go? So please, KEEP coming back no matter what.

                          Keep moving forward, and please post your success!

                          Love,
                          K9
                          :heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:

                          Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Tail Between the Legs Thread

                            K9Lover;1378079 wrote: Hi Tipps,

                            I wanted to pop in and say I am here to offer my support! If I had a dollar for every time I "started over", I wouldn't be sitting at work right now :H

                            So everyone, never feel like you're not worthy of coming back, we are ALL worthy. This is not easy, and if you can't come here and be honest, where can you go? So please, KEEP coming back no matter what.

                            Keep moving forward, and please post your success!

                            Love,
                            K9
                            you know, K9 Lover, you are ALWAYS one of the first of the successful gang to jump in to every thread to simply offer your encouragement. You are my hero. Thanks.
                            Tipplerette

                            I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

                            "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
                            ? Lao-Tzu

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Tail Between the Legs Thread

                              I consider myself a rcovering alcoholic in the early days of sobriety. I used to drink a 12 pack a night, Since May 22, I have had approx 12 beers. A few on my vacation, a few the past few days on a biz trip.
                              I am SO freaking proud if myself. Sue me if someone does not like it. I have made it almost 4 MONTHS with hardly any AL. For me that is amazing. So, be honest and keep on talking. It will help. You can get some tough love here, but you almost always get love.....
                              I love my family more than alcohol.:h
                              Live in the Solution....not the problem

                              Comment

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