Tail Between the Legs Thread

[Juja]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

May I join you?

Hello, lovely people,

I'm Juja. I was on MWO for quite awhile, but because I failed over and over, and was envious of those who were racking up days, I went AWOL. I couldn't find my way, and pouted. Small of me, to say the least, a I didn't like myself for it. But I'm back, with 8 AF days behind me, and a more loving attitude toward others and myself. Loving others is my usual modus operandi, so I suppose it had more to do with my failings.

I like the name of this thread, and I thoroughly understand the concept. We've been condtioned to feel shame, most of us anyway, so, of course, the title would ring strike a chord with those of us who fail over and over in our attempts to be AF. We're here to move beyond that, and offer support.

So, with all that being said, may I join you lovely people? From what I've read, you're all loving, supportive, and fun folks, and I'd like to be one of you.

I don't know why Tiplerette left, but I do hope she comes back.

If the thread continues, I'll tell you why I'm back, as much as I'd rather not.:blush: I know it's important to say it, and face it.

Hoping to hear from you.

Love,:lipstick:
Juja

[Juja]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

Kaput?

If this thread is toast, where is this crew posting? :upset:

[scottish lass]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

I'm here, with my tail between my legs.
The name may not be the best, but it is how I feel......
Day 2 today and happy to post as often as I can, hopefully daily to try and get some days going....
So, hi all visiting...

[Juja]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

scottish lass;1397556 wrote: I'm here, with my tail between my legs.
The name may not be the best, but it is how I feel......
Day 2 today and happy to post as often as I can, hopefully daily to try and get some days going....
So, hi all visiting...

I'm with you Scotland Yard! We'll solve this addiction mystery, by jove! We need you on the case a few days, at least. Overtime pay available. Frightful mess we have on our hands...dear me.

Buggers with the name! No need to get our knickers in a twist over a name, IMVHO!:H We all know what it means, and how we feel. Putting lipstick on a pig doesn't make it look a bit better.

Carry on, detective.

(Eww, I think my American slang got mixed in with the Brit. No worries! Crap, is that an Aussie saying?)

[Wildflowers]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

Hi Windy, I wasn't in your head, I was in mine. Its just so funny how so many of us have these same things in common. Or maybe I was picking up on something. But, you can hang with us more often if you'd like, when you have time. I do hope you will do this for you! It to seems like it took forever to figure that out, even tho I heard it over & over.... When would I learn to love me & find my voice & own my power? Not do things that I really didn't want to do, did them just because I wanted to fit in. When inside I'd hear this little voice saying no. Where was my integrity? Where had my self respect gone?

Well I think I found my backbone again & not my wishbone. If it means some people don't like me verses me not liking me, well then I have a choice to make don't I. I choose liking me today. I might be lonelier, but I have my integrity & self respect again. Besides who wants friends like that anyways Windy? The gift of recovery also brings clarity & peace. But, it does cost, usually its painful. That's OK. Eventually, there will be new friends & I'm being true to myself.

You do whatever it is you have to do, to be well & happy. Do it for you!!!... Look for the answers in your physical, mental, emotional & spiritual health. This can be harder to overcome if your a working Mom to. The stresses can be much harder to overcome. But, please don't put yourself last anymore. Look for ways to balance your life. Sometimes that means saying No. Asking for help. Spending a whole day cooking & freezing meals. Whatever it takes to lessen your burdens.

Find your voice Windy!.... The one that says I'm worth it & I'm beautiful!.... I can do this!.... You can have even more fun in sobriety!... I have enough alcohol cells left over to last a couple of life times. I can have a pretty ~ foo ~ foo drinks & act drunk like any body's business if I want to. I will feel better the next day to. You will feel more independent by owning your own power by accepting that you have a drinking problem, getting on with your life now, getting healthier & happier now!... Not giving a dam what anybody else thinks about it either!... It only matters what you think about it in the end anyways!.... It's quite liberating actually!... Because your no longer living in denial & in fear. It freeing & empowering!....

Just writing all of this is putting a big smile on my face. I feel a bit of Dopamine release. My special counselor was trained in nero she was very cool. She used to tell me I was teaching her to. She cried sometimes with me. This is a sign of a good counselor if anybody's going to one. There should be some dialouge going on.

Hi LillyE,

These treasures I've found, I've gathered from places all over on my journey to sobriety, recovery & learning to love myself for whom I am. It's hard to pin point one thing, or one place I've found them. I think overall after learning the truth about how damaging alcohol is to my brain, organs, & spirit, etc is very helpful! What really was the key for myself is, I was tired of being unhappy, sick inside & out. A big part of this was physiological for myself. Yet, I also needed emotional healing.

I do take an off label AD. There was no way I could stay sober & work on my emotional, mental & spiritual health if I didn't take care of my physical needs first. I finally had to admit after dozens & dozens of attempts for years with some small but not happy ones, that I needed to reach out to professionals & get help. Had to get out of my own way & swallow my pride & ego. Part of that was overcoming the stigma & hurt that I'd encountered from others in society. Unfortunately, some of those people are even in recovery & work in the medical field. Awareness needs to be raised.

Then after sobering up this time little light bulbs kept going off. My notebooks, files, meeting rooms, books, counseling, op-rehab, music, people I've met over the years its all begun to fall in place. One day I woke up & realized that I'm beautiful, worthy of what I've traveled so far to find, that I already knew deep down inside. Of course my two beautiful daughters, mom, hubs, one extra special counselor, one beautiful woman from this site helped me too. I just have to look in the mirror & remind myself each day. I'm lovable, capable, competent. These are some of the things also that WFS teaches. Jean Kirkpatrick Ph.D is the founder & was ~ is thought to be an expert in sobriety for woman.

Today I don't let anybody try & take this away from me. That includes my hubs, my kids, my mom, friends, my GF who I was doing some work for, whom I'm on the Fritz with. I read a passage everyday from Hazelden's ~Thought for the day, or my AA friend who was my Nana sponsor sends me a passage as well. She's my spiritual advisor who has 43 yrs of sobriety. If you find the proper 12 steppers they are some of thee best people to teach & guide. She's a wise & spry 81 yr old friend.

Thank you for sharing that passage from Spiritual River site. I visit over there too. The passage is true. I know when I'm going thru pain, it usually means, I'm going thru a learning spurt. If I get thru it, I don't have to repeat it as often, or I recognize it & have some tools to deal. There were times in my life I truly didn't care anymore, but I'm so very thankful those days have passed.

We had dinner with our oldest daughter last night & her new BF. I talked with my youngest daughter on the phone today. I cried happy tears because I'm happier than I've been in a long time, because of my growth & my continued sobriety. It's worth the hard work. It's not easy, but its so worth it!!!... I've been tested some days beyond belief!!!.. My kids are so proud of their Mom ~ Me. Now I have a tear of gratitude.. Not one sip in five months & there have been some days I wanted to, but most days not.

Thanks Lilly for letting us know to read Turns posts, she's a very talented & gifted writer, along with very solid & intelligent sobriety ~ recovery!!!.... I only read 1/2 of her story. I should finish it one of these days.


Keep posting people. I was the Slip & Relapse Queen for Many ~ Many Years. "It Takes What It Takes". Never Give Up!!!... There is Always Hope!!!... You never know when it will stick!!!!.... This thread isn't dead unless you say so people. But, you do have to want to stop drinking more than you want to drink & be honest with yourself about your problem!..... It will over time get worse. Especially as we age.

Come now, you can do it!.... How about a one week challenge? Then a nice little reward, hmm.

Take Good Care :h

Wildflowers :l

[Alcoholic]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

Tipp and mama bear:

You guys are my inspiration!

[daisy45]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

scottish lass;1397556 wrote: I'm here, with my tail between my legs.
The name may not be the best, but it is how I feel......
Day 2 today and happy to post as often as I can, hopefully daily to try and get some days going....
So, hi all visiting...

Hi Scotlass! Back to day 1 for me today. Haven't had time to read back yet, so hope all's well with you......

[scottish lass]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

Hi Daisy, few of us around on the starting again mode, am struggling with lots of things - something has to go right one day! How are you?? Hows your Dad...well done for coming back and starting agin - as long as we keep doing that, we have to be winning...

[Wildflowers]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

Glad you ladies came back & told on yourselves. You both have more courage than I did thru the years. I wished I would have had a place to come like this. I just hope you both will learn the truth about alcohol & the damaging effects it has on your beautiful bodies, minds & spirits soon. It's absolute poison for problem drinkers & alkies.

Maybe some scientific research would help. It takes self honesty, desire, dedication & commitment to live this new life!!!... This new life is so much better than the old one. There is never going to be a perfect time in our lives, there will always be circumstances that we have no control over. If we keep delaying our choices to live a healthier & happier life, we may wake up one day & realize our window of opportunity has passed us by.

Today I'm grateful I continue to renew my daily commitment to honor myself in this sobriety & recovery journey. It's not easy all the time, but it's so worth it!!!.... I must live with purposeful intention to survive & live well into my aging years! This takes action upon my part!....

I'm the type of alkie that when I start drinking, it starts slow, but then I keep obsessing about it & before I know it, I'm right back at previous drinking levels. It's scary for myself. No drinking for me what so ever now.

Oh & by the way, what I meant by the one week challenge & then a reward wasn't meant to drink again. That's if anybody is up for the challenge?

[scottish lass]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

Day 3 - tough evening, but i will win - hope the headache is worth it (I know it will be, but wish the evenings felt as good as the mornings!!)
Hope everyone else is hanging in too....

[Juja]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

scottish lass;1398328 wrote: Day 3 - tough evening, but i will win - hope the headache is worth it (I know it will be, but wish the evenings felt as good as the mornings!!)
Hope everyone else is hanging in too....

Ugh, that blasted, dull headache. It passes after a few days for me. You hang in there, too, okay? :l

[Tipplerette]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

Hi Guys, I am back with tail between legs but feeling good these days with yet another resolution to give abstinence a go. I am using a computer at my step son's and can't even read all the posts. Just noticed that my absence has been noted.

Will post Monday with my latest plan.

So glad this thread is working for you guys. Can't wait to read all the posts slowly. We don't have internet access at home anymore so i am limited in my computer time.

Talk later...

[daisy45]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

Hi Tipps; me too!
I am glad to see you here today - I feel good when I see 'old friends' back on board.

[FreeFly]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

Hi Daisy & Tipps, can i join you please. Slipped back into a pattern of 5 off, 2 on. I feel the sadness coming back. Been reading around and see lots of madness again (tis full moon tomorrow, perhaps that's why ) but would like to settle into a safe thread again.

[daisy45]

Tail Between the Legs Thread

Hi Freefly; it is very sad to see so much sniping on these boards. I have never seen it so bad in 2 years.
Let's stick together and get back on track again.....