Suggestions for visiting a friend tonigt

[ScoobyDoo]

I am going out tonight with a really good girlfriend and her hubby. I know she also drinks too much too (similar drinking pattern to me) and has periods where she doesn't drink. She is a business collegue so I don't want to tell her about what I'm doing with the mod... yet.

Anyway... I had my first AF yesterday, and finished the book last night and waiting for the Kutzu to arrive.

Actually, I'm not even sure what I'm trying to ask so far as suggestions go. lol

I'll be driving home tonight so I'll have to stick to 3 glasses of wine and will try really hard not to have a drink when I get home.

I suppose, it just feels really weird that I've made this silent conscious choice to moderate and really should stick the first 30 days out as AF, but then again, maybe I should just wait for the Kutzu and other supps I ordered, and CD's to arrive. They'll be here in about 10 days time. should I just moderate and wait until I'm fully setup before I do the first 30 days AF?

Hmmm... I suppose I am ambivalent at the moment. Any general comments appreciated.

DooDoo

[Bluebell]

Suggestions for visiting a friend tonigt

I'll be driving home tonight so I'll have to stick to 3 glasses of wine

Aaaaargh! Wouldn't that be over the limit?

Best of luck for tonight.

[ScoobyDoo]

Suggestions for visiting a friend tonigt

Maybe you're right! We'll be having dinner and hanging out for a few hours so think 3 whould be ok. Maybe I should stick with 2 and feel better controlled for it too.

[Accountable for Me]

Suggestions for visiting a friend tonigt

Seeing you are driving, you can't get blottoed anyway. I think once you are there you will know what you will want to do. Whether it remain abstainant or have a couple of glasses of wine.

You sound pretty confident with the moderation route. It is suggested to complete 30 days of abstainence before moderating, ultimately it is up to you.

You could wait until you have your 'weapons of choice' on hand before you start. I am not sure where you are at with cravings and withdrawals, so hard to say. Either way you won't be drunk because you are driving. So I would say you are safe either way. Kind of an ambivalent answer, sorry. Hard to say what you should do. Only you will know this when the time comes.

[Ripley]

Suggestions for visiting a friend tonigt

Hi - I've tolds friend I have given up booze for Lent, which sort of coincides with my 30 day AF target. I know it's a lie, but it stops them looking weirdly at me when I order a n/a drink, and also means I don't dare cave in in front of them otherwise I will look like a total weak willed loser.

[Arial]

Suggestions for visiting a friend tonigt

Hi Doo-Doo

Also told people that I was just 'cleaning the system' for a while - taking a break - which they seemed to accept - strangely a couple of friends said they, too, were going to 'detox' for a while - for different reasons, but I got immediate support! Who knows - maybe your friend will follow your lead

I have also tried the moderation route and found it not too difficult when out of the house(the driving home was the control), but it set me up for drinking once home (to congratulate myself for being good and to make up for lost time!) I also found that having to make a choice each day - will I drink/won't I/how much/can I control It (usually 'no' to that one) got very wearing. This time it's just no alcohol - takes all choice away, the decision's made, don't have to worry about it anymore - and boy, what a relief! - now my choice is how to deal with it, and what to do with all the extra time

Have a good, safe, sober evening!

[satori]

Suggestions for visiting a friend tonigt

Tell them anything you like as an excuse - but you should try not to drink if you can so early in your journey.

Say you are detoxing or say you are on medication.

I have been known to say I am on atibiotics - if someone asks what for - I usually say "you really do not want to know" - that usually shuts them up!

LOL - well - it works for guys - It might just make them discover that it is the one thing they really DO want to know!

Anyway - whatever you decide, good luck.

take care

Satori
xx

[tawnyfrog]

Suggestions for visiting a friend tonigt

Just an observation .... once your drinking buddies have had their 2nd drink, they actually don't give a rat's arse about whether you're drinking or not. And the more they drink, the less they notice that you aren't.

[Bella]

Suggestions for visiting a friend tonigt

DooDoo, you will do what feels right for you. I think you are very brave and strong for going out at all! I dare not go out to a pub or restaurant because i don't trust myself to resist. I'm 17 days AF now and i'm beginning to think i'll end up becoming agrophobic if i don't venture out soon! My poor husband will find someone else!
Good luck and enjoy the company B xx

[ScoobyDoo]

Suggestions for visiting a friend tonigt

Just thought I'd report back.

I went to my friends place, reminded her that I had to drive. We had a great evening and felt fabulous and in control. I drove home with the music turned up LOUD and when I got home, in the past would have walked in the door and gone straight to a glass (or 4) of red, but instead, grabbed a big glass of icey water and read a magazine at the kitchen bench. Went to bed when I felt tired and woke up early to the glorious day outside

Satori, I laughed at your 'you really don't want to know'. lol

Tawnyfrog... that is so true!

I need to think up an explanation strategy (like Arial's) so I can be totally AF for the first 30 day period while in the company of friends. I'm waiting for the Kutzu to arrive before I officially start the AF but am not drinking tonight.

I've also been thinking that once I am feeling confident that I have a firm handle on this, and feeling more confident that I can abstain/moderate successfully, I will admit to friends and acquaintances that I am a problem drinker hence my lifestyle change. Will think about that further when I'm ready.

I'm giving myself a big pat on the back for last night.

A deep thanks from me, to all of you for your support.

DooDoo

[sri]

Suggestions for visiting a friend tonigt

Great job, DooDoo!!! What a success story!!! Good for you and inspiration for me for tonight! Thanks for sharing it!

[Arial]

Suggestions for visiting a friend tonigt

Congratulations!

Fantastic news, DooDoo - many congratulations - and glad it felt so good the next morning - pitty we can't bottle that feeling and sell it - so much more intoxicating than wine!
:goodjob: