To My Little Child

[Faithful]

To My Little Child

I woke up hungover this morning and kept saying to myself that I have to make a decision and I do. I need to do the same thing I did when I stopped smoking 12 years ago....I told myself that smoking wasn't an option anymore. Both Allen Carr and Rational Recovery say to just make up your mind and stop! No looking back. Has this worked for anyone here?

[lolab]

To My Little Child

Hi Faithful - I apologize as I was away from the site for a bit...

as far as your question - I think that mindset does help. We talk lots about it in the newbies nest - if you'd like to visit - https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...648-30074.html - I think it's important to work on changing the way you view alcohol - definitely...see yourself as being incredibly lucky and thankful that you don't poison yourself anymore - instead of feeling deprived. Sometimes, it's definitely hard - but that's what's nice about being in a group where you can reach out and any number of people will usually be around to help you. We all know the mind games that we play with ourselves - feeling so determined in the morning - only to start fooling ourselves later in the day that's ok to do it just one more time....

Take care of yourself today - drink lots of water and rest and start working on your plan....head back to the toolbox for some ideas...there are also a couple of great threads that I'll dig up for you that help you to make a plan that works.

lola

[lolab]

To My Little Child

https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...lan-41280.html

[dixon]

To My Little Child

Faithful;1391915 wrote: I'm so glad to be back on these forums. I was here before but not for long. The bad bottle lured me into it's trap again and I was gone for the last few years. I went to see a great therapist the other day as I knew I had to stop pretending that I was like a "normal" drinker that just drank too much sometimes. I was sick and tired of waking up sick and tired. And the most ironic thing? I'm a vegan and in school becoming certified as a holistic health and wellness coach! Health is my passion and I love sharing it with other people Crazy isn't it? By day I'm this healthy Type A that's excited about life and wanting to share what I'm learning with the world (except for the 2 day a week average that I'm so hungover I can barely function) and by about 4 o'clock...well, you all know the story. After the therapist asked about my life and I told him about my father who by day was the best pilot ever! And when the plane hit the ground, he would drink until he was stupid. He made scenes, police were called often, he would scream and try to hit my mother and I was the only child left at home and so I protected her. I would tell him that I would hate him if he didn't stop and that would stop him. One time when I was in second grade a friend spent the night. I would not usually spend the night away from home because I needed to protect my mom. My dad came storming in at about 3 am and my friend got so scared, she jumped out of my 2 story window and ran home. She told all the kids at school what happened. I could tell you more but I won't bore you with more details. You all probably could write a very similar story. The therapist told me I should write so I did. Here's what I wrote this morning:

To my little self, the child that hid, the child that protected the parent, the child that was neglected emotionally, the child that never felt like one of the crowd, the child that felt different, the child that looked for love and acceptance in all the wrong places, the one that only remembers chaos and screaming and fighting, the forgotten kid, the kid that was never really a kid...
I love you and I?ll care for you now. It wasn?t your fault. You don?t need to hide out anymore. You can go for a bike ride, have a picnic, draw pictures if you want and play games. Jump on your mini trampoline, listen to music as loud as you want, laugh out loud and watch movies until midnight. People will like you for just being who you are. We all have a past and you have grown up with hurts and memories that can help you to empathize with other people. It?s OK to let people see who you really are. And remember God loves you too...more than you can ever imagine.

Please welcome me into your community. I need help in my recovery. I never want to poison myself again. I love my life and I want to heal. Thank you for listening.

Good to seeing you again here !
Please use every possibilities,just gamble with the alternatives to AL.You will win onday for sure .
:l:l:l

[bouchard01]

To My Little Child

Hi Faithful ... don't stay away, that's what I do but if we stay here we will learn. I too was very touched by your letter. I'm in the same boat ... Keep on trying .... welcome back.

[Faithful]

To My Little Child

Lola, Thank you so much for your words of encouragement. Not sure about the sobriety plan?

[Faithful]

To My Little Child

Thank you all.

[aspman]

To My Little Child

Faithful;1402375 wrote: I woke up hungover this morning and kept saying to myself that I have to make a decision and I do. I need to do the same thing I did when I stopped smoking 12 years ago....I told myself that smoking wasn't an option anymore. Both Allen Carr and Rational Recovery say to just make up your mind and stop! No looking back. Has this worked for anyone here?

hiya faithful, speaking for myself, I decided enough was enough when i noticed my 9moth old son copying me with his milk bottle. skulling some and sighing after as i did with a beer. I cryed, rejected, pityed myself then came to the conclusion that it HAD to stop with me. have you tryed meds? i found campral to be a great help.
It realy HAS to come from yourself, i had pretended to try to quit numerous time, but when i put my foot down and made a plan and had a back up plan i stuck to it.
Its been 3 years since i noticed my boy coppying me and i quit, my daughter has never seen her daddy drink, she never will because i dont want her to fall in love with a drunk like her dad, she may still anyway but i dont plan on contributing anything more than my genes.

if you WANT to you can, i have faith.

aspy, sober since 26/10/2009

[Faithful]

To My Little Child

Aspman,
Thank you for posting. When you are sober for 3 years, what brings you back to post on this site. Do you think about AL often? I'm trying to learn as much as I can. Thanks!

[aspman]

To My Little Child

I dont post often, how ever i think about drinking most days.
not strong craving just wistfull thinking and random desires.But they are tempory and pail beside my love of life and my desire for a safe happy home for my kids.
I am what AA call a dry drunk, what ever that means.

work hard, you CAN beat this beast.

[Faithful]

To My Little Child

I am in awe aspman. Three years...what an amazing accomplishment! You should be very proud of yourself. When you say that you think about it most days, what do you think? I want to know what I can expect. I quit smoking 12 years ago and I hardly ever think about it anymore.

[Faithful]

To My Little Child

Also...can you tell me more about having a plan and a backup plan?

[aspman]

To My Little Child

there are heaps of good tips in the tool box thread.
things like surfing a craving past the hard bit, and for me it helped to go to bed early for the first few weeks, i would work out till i was so tired then try to crash out so i would not think about drinking.
I chose pastimes that slowed my access to drinking, long motorbike rides or swims.
I designated myself as the driver for events when i was strong enough to be around drinking, and always had a story if i needed to leave.
I still avoid triggers if i can. I can go any ware now and do anything but why put temptation in my reach
I have had deaths births and marriages in my immediate family, i refuseto think of drinking as a TREAT, I can do one so i wont have any.
I chose to tell people i have a drinking problem, that way i feel like i am being watched and accoutable to others as well as myself.

I am impressed with people who quit smoking, you can surely use so tricks you learn there to beat the BEAST.

aspy.

[lolab]

To My Little Child

Hi this morning...faithful - did you click on the words "What's your sobriety plan?" It will lead you to the thread. aspman has great advice - obviously - he's been successful for 3 years. :-)

[Faithful]

To My Little Child

Good Morning Lola, Where do you click on the words? I don't see a search box or anything. I'm not very forum saavy yet! I really appreciate you checking in