Keeping it positive :-)

[lushy]

I wanted to start a thread about how important I think it is to try and do the best we can to focus on all of the positive changes we have made in our lives with regards to drinking since coming here. I think we attach these negative thoughts to ourselves and then things become a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy. (If my real life friends could hear me now they would not recognize me because I used to tend to be a real negative thinker! LOL). Many of us have had this habit/addiction for many, many years. It is all we know. For most of us, that is not going to change overnight. We ALL have to focus on what we are doing right to get us where we want to be. Last weekend I overindulged more than I should have. I did not feel all that hot on Saturday. So I sat down and listed the things I HAVE done in the last couple of years to reduce my drinking: I no longer drink beer before I have wine, and I used to drink 3-5 beers a day, I no longer drink out of a box because that got me into dangerous territory because I would not keep track of what I was drinking, I am getting AF days in which NEVER had happened before, and I am filling my body with the healthy supplements and such from this program, not to mention meeting incredible people on these boards. And you know what? Within an hour or so I felt so much better because I was not sitting there with that self-loathing and depression anymore. So I screwed up one night. BIG DEAL!!!!

I propose we all think about what we HAVE done in regards to our drinking that is positive and write them down, either here or on your own. NO MORE NEGATIVE SELF-TALK!!!

Okay, off my annoying soap box now!!!

[blondie]

Keeping it positive :-)

I know there is a way out of this addiction and a better life; I glimpse it now and then, before I couldn't see it at all. For that and many other things I am grateful; so I know I am moving forward rather than being stuck
love blondie

[Bella]

Keeping it positive :-)

Yippee doo da day!!! i have been trying be positive too. I sent a reply to someone earlier today saying that positive thinking is the key and i was telling myself that also. I felt so much better and am training myself to find/use my inner strength to think in a more positive way. Look at the good, Glass half full therory. So this is a fab idea of yours and i am def. up for this one. happy thoughts are contagious.. Thanks lush. B

[samadhi]

Keeping it positive :-)

Lush - You make a good point and I agree that it is more constructive to not indulge in negative self talk. However, I don't agree with making a rule not to do that. I thought this forum was meant to be for people to express whatever they thought without fears. Somedays, for some people, it may not be all positive. I just posted a thread about dealing with lonliness without a drink and after reading your post I felt like maybe I shouldn't have. It wasn't negative self talk, it was about dealing with negative feelings. But how can I tell if people reading it know the difference and won't take it as a negative post? Who can judge what is negatve self talk for each individual? I agree that we should focus on the positive, etc., but I wouldn't want people to question themselves about posting.

[lucky 2.0]

Keeping it positive :-)

I think Lush was a bit tongue in cheek in her proposition but I do so agree with the premise of the importance of positive thinking. We do become what we focus on. What we believe becomes our reality. This is why I have such disdain for AA. They fill our minds with bs that we are diseased and flawed and can never have a single drink as long as we live and need their program of dependency for the rest our lives. It is terribly depressing. And not true. And does not work. My plan is to graduate from MWO @ some point!

So, bring on the positive thinking for one and for all.

[irishlady]

Keeping it positive :-)

Well, as anyone who has read my posts on here will know, I am all for positive talk and positive thinking, it does help to keep you on the upside of life, BUT, there have been, and I daresay there will be, days when, quite frankly I feel like shit, depressed and really down....Those are the days when I would need this forum more... Its quite easy to come on here in a good mood and post really positive stuff, but if we adopted this new rule, I for one would be really hesitant about posting anything of a negative nature in case it had a knock on effect on others....

[lushy]

Keeping it positive :-)

Thanks Lucky, yes I was being tongue in cheek; just trying to get people to look for the good they have done first before beating themselves up. Lord knows, I have my negative days and it is good to get it out here and get support. I was not saying we should not do that. Sorry for the confusion!!

[Guest]

Keeping it positive :-)

I think I can, I think I can.....love you Lush!

[Breez]

Keeping it positive :-)

Setting up a positive tone for the day will equip us to deal with situations that may come along. May a kind word, a reassuring post and a warm smile be ours everyday!
:armsaround: :armsaround: :armsaround: :armsaround:

[drEAmIng]

Keeping it positive :-)

Thanks for the post Lush - great idea. I've been trying to keep positivity & gratefulness in the forefront of my mind as of late. Just learning about how my vibration - how I feel - will attract like energies, meaning energies that are of the same vibration. So if I'm sending out feelings of loneliness & fear, then that is what will come back to me in the form of my experiences. If I send out feelings of gratefulness, then I will attract more of what I am grateful for, more good things & experiences into my life.

That's not to say I try to stuff my feelings, What I try to do is experience them while looking at them from a detached position, letting them pass through me. I also try to use my mind as a tool to help me grow and be happy, not as something to run rampant with self criticism, self doubt and other forms of fear.

For a long time I let my mind take a negative feeling and beat me up me with it, without any consciousness that I didn't have to do that to myself. Now I think it's really important to not indulge in negative thinking, yet still let my feelings be present and flowing. I'm working on setting time aside each day to meditate on all that I am grateful for, some people call this praying. From what I have learned about quantum physics, I've been able to understand that this works, and how it works, to help manifest what I want in my life.

Can I get a AMEN!?:H

[lushy]

Keeping it positive :-)

Amen dreaming!! Honestly, I can be, and used to be an only negative thinker for many years. I suppose it was some sort of defense mechanism or something, I don't know. I guess since finding these boards I have been able to get out of that negative hole more and more because I realize I am not crazy or alone with this drinking issue, and that in and of itself has been very freeing for me. I still have very negative days, and in fact last night had a real doozy but I was able to turn that negativity around by focusing on what I have done good lately.

[irishlady]

Keeping it positive :-)

I have been doing a lot more meditation of late, and it really does help you to let all negative thoughts just flow through you... At one time I used to hang on to them, believe them to be true, but now I know better.. Also, I am constantly looking for and finding the good and the popsitive in others as well as myself....

[AAthlete]

Keeping it positive :-)

Being negative puts us in a catch-22. If we are negative, then we can justify our drinking by saying I am a loser, idiot, etc., and because I am I might as well have a drink to make me feel better. Then of course, I am a loser, idiot, etc. because I drink.

To me, being positive in the face of this affliction is the ultimate display of strength. You are truly admitting that you have a problem, but are also truly working on solving it in a constructive manner.

Great post, Lush!

[samadhi]

Keeping it positive :-)

I guess if there is one negative about posting instead of a face to face interaction, is that the point may be misinterpreted. Thanks for the private message, Lush. I get your original post - I believe you were trying to get us out of a constant "woe is me" attitude an get us to start thinking along the lines of gratitude, looking at our progress instead of the slips, etc. From the posts on this thread, it sounds like alot of people know about "the Secret" and maybe have seen the Oprah episode on it. I agree, what you think about and feel expands.

[lushy]

Keeping it positive :-)

Yes, very true things can be misconstrued!! Maybe we should start doing audio posts? (Kidding). And that was the point I was trying to make. Perhaps if when we are feeling really down about our behavior and we focus on the good we have done we might not feel so crappy. Because we all have good in us, even though some days it is harder to see it than others.

Okay, done talking. Much to the delight of most of you, I am sure.