AA Meetings

[shitzulover]

Hi MWO fellows! I just wanted to inquire to see how many of you go to AA meetings and get somethings out of it to help you with cravings. I am starting tomorrow (again) and haven't found the "right" meeting yet. What helps you at these meetings???

[AAthlete]

AA Meetings

I've been to AA meetings but they haven't been for me. However, I encourage you to check them out and see if they work for you....

To me, it all seems to be about finding the right 'family' to relate to...

[dilayne]

AA Meetings

Hey Shitzulover (cute!)
I went to AA years ago and have quite a few good friends who are 'lifers'...in definitely has saved lives! I agree with AAthlete..the group can make a difference, so 'shop around'..if you aren't comfortable in one, then maybe try a few others. The 'fellowship' is very helpful to many..just to be with others who have had the same struggles is comforting, also, it's a place to give back what you've learned by helping others. Many great life tools to be learned there..I must say that my memories of AA were generally good and that it marked the threshold into a deeply spiritual lifetime since. Good Luck!
d

[Cashregister]

AA Meetings

Hiya,

I went to five AA meetings - tried different ones (as I was told) and ended up back at one I kind of liked. However, I really knew right from the start that it was not for me. The focus on drinking is so strong - every day - day by day - think about it all the time and don't drink. Like being on a diet for the rest of my like (that's how I felt). I wante to get to the underlying cause, not obsess about it for the rest of my life without understanding.

And I think I have - finally - and it really helps!


And being the obsesive type to a certain extent - well.....it just made things worse for me!


On the other hand it does help many people - it's really a personality thing I think - it's either your type of gig or not.

No harm in trying and it might be right up your alley.

Lotsa love

Cashy
xxxx

[lucky 2.0]

AA Meetings

No offense, but I think a better use of your time would be staying home and playing with that adorable little shitzu. If you go anyway, I will doggysit for you.

All the best-
lucky

[Reenie]

AA Meetings

Hi All: I routinely check out the forums on MWO and chime in once in a while. Shitzuluver, I'm so glad that you started the topic to go to AA or not. I just got off the phone with my sister in-law. Basically, my conversation with her was about how I was feeling towards AA and how I didn't feel like going to a meeting tonight. You see, I went AF for 41 days. During that time, I went to 20 meetings and 4 physco therapy sessions. In addition, I kept in touch with my temporary sponsor every other day via phone. Well, this past Sunday I relapsed. I went to my sister in-laws house, someone who I love dearly, someone who I use to drink with, and someone who I like to let my hair down with. Anyway, I got bombed. She drove me home in my car, while her husband followed. The following morning I felt very ashamed of myself. I was also very remorseful that I worked so hard toward my sobreity only to mess it up after 41 days. Sure enough my temporary sponsor called me. She left me a message checking in to see how I was doing. I was livid. I didn't want to call her back and tell her I messed up. I knew I had to do it and get it over with. I called her. She wasn't too pleased. She stated that she could see it coming because I haven't been crying about losing my best friend (alcohol). She stated that I try to be too perferct, that not drinking is like losing my best friend, and that I was too confident. Well, let me tell you.... I feel like I haven't LIVED the past 41 days. I feel like I been living in seclusion, taking this AA thing too seriously (although I need it, and know I have a problemn and am an alcoholic). I feel like my mind and life has been consumed the past 41 days of AA and not taking the first drink. No wonder why I messed up. Anyway, last night I skipped going to the women's meeting I like going to. Tonight, I skipped going to another meeting that I have attended in the past. You see, I'm an open person. I'm full of heart. Maybe I do try to be perfect. But I do know I take things WAY TOO SERIOUSLY. Certainly, my drinking problem is something to take seriously, but I have a life outside of AA and reading Grapevine and checking with fellow AA people on the phone. I was bound to mess up because I was so scared to mess up. Now that I have relapsed, I'm not only mad at me, but everyone around me. Okay.. I have to get to the point. AA is full of wonderful people. Being a beginner I find the senior people overly helpful, and maybe too helpful at times. Yet, they have overcome hurdles, and have applied the tools, and are full of wisdom. I feel like I have exposed myself to way too many strangers, and by not showing up to meetings my fellow AA's are probably thinking I have relapsed. So sorry.... I am realy going on. AA is supportive... and very compassionite... I think some of the demands can be tough though. I work full time. I commute hours to work, and I'm exhausted. I personally can't make a 90 meetings in 90 days. Some of the AA people live and breath for the meetings (but then again it's sustaining their sobriety), I can't do that right now. I want my life back and have a little fun. I need to go to the gym, spend time with my husband, and visit with my family. I took this way to seriously and have become a miserable recluse. Sorry for rambling and for maybe not getting my point across. I needed to vent. Deep down, I know I have many AA people around me, and eventually, I will go to a meeting. Probably this Saturday morning. Please go and listen. You will be amazed at how strong these people are and how they overcome some drunken times.

[shitzulover]

AA Meetings

Boy, thankyou reenie for your wonderful insight to AA. I will give it another try. I need to. I am starting to "plan" to drink now and it scares me.

[YoungAtHeart]

AA Meetings

I know a very wonderful and stubborn woman who went to AA. She did not do 90 meeting in 90 days--she went to 2 meetings a week--all the HIGHER POWER stuff pissed her off, but she really wanted to get sober and she did. She "took the best and left the rest" as they advise you to do in AA. I know for sure that she had been sober over 15 years. I've lost touch with her, but I am assuming that she is sober still.

[sammys]

AA Meetings

I went one time and it was really weird, there were also people who were hooked on both alcohol and crack. They went around the room and told these really bad stories of how they had messed up, they all sounded like they were on the verge of going back and if not for being at the meeting that day they would all start drinking again. I was encouraged to go to a meeting everyday. It was all to overwhelming for me at the time. I new something had to change for me but all the praying et. and stories were so strange. Maybe it is about finding the right group and I was just in one that was pretty intense.
I don't think I will go back. But I beleive you should try it if you want, every situation is different for everyone.

Let me know what you think.
Sammys

[Reenie]

AA Meetings

Most of the time I enjoy the meetings "once I get there". I really prefer "not to share" and prefer to listen. Occassionaly, the hour seems to drag on. Most often than not, I feel good after leaving the meeting and getting on with my day. I think my issue right now is the fact that I relapsed. I'm dissapointed in myself and wonder if I have the strength to start all over again. I also have fear of relapsing again. While I was driving home tonight, I called my temporary sponsor. She usually hears from me every other day. It has been 3.5 days since she last heard from me. Soon after the, "Hi, how are yous" she asked me if I have been going to meetings. I probably answered snippy. I said, "No, I didn't go Tuesday night, didn't go Wednesday night, and I'm not going tonight". She mumbled, "Oh, boy". I tried explaining to her that I feel like the last 41 days of my life have been consumed with thinking of AA and abstaining from alcohol. I told her I feel like I haven't been living. I feel isolated and feel like a recluse, and I hardly smile and laugh any more. She replied something to the effect that "the miracle" just doesn't happen, that I have to pay my dues, and go to the meetings even if I don't want to, and that this really isn't a fun time. Personally, I don't think I explained myself or my intentions too well. I told her I just wanted to back off from AA just a little. I think she got offended; and or was giving up on me. She said, "She can't try to save everyone's life, and to keep in touch". I replied, "I will and thank you". I feel pretty bad about our phone conversation. I was in a lousy mood to begin with. My intent was not to take anything out on her... Just to express that I needed some time to get over my shame, my lousy day (s) at work, and to give myself some genuine down time. I haven't been to the gym in ages. I haven't socialized in ages and rarely do I even speak to my husband. I feel miserable. Anyway, for tonight, I have to chill out. When I can muster up my strength, I will call her again. I wonder how she'll react to me.
Reenie

[YoungAtHeart]

AA Meetings

I hope that she'll respond well, Reenie, but even if she doesn't, that's about her investment in AA, not about you. I think your intuition is telling you what you need--some down time and some healing time from feeling ashamed. Take care of yourself my dear. I'm sorry you slipped, and maybe you do need to grieve about alcohol--I don't know. But you DID accomplish 41 days alcohol free, and I think that that is a huge accomplishment!

Take care!
Kathy

[lucky 2.0]

AA Meetings

AA is a cult. They are always looking for newbies to brainwash. I could not bite my tongue any longer.

[Reenie]

AA Meetings

Young at Heart and Lucky: I understand where you both are coming from and appreciate your insight. A little down time and fun time IS what I need. I plan on going to the gym early Saturday morning, having lunch with my father, and going to the movies with my husband at night. As for the temporary sponsor, I agree with Young at Heart. The time my temporary sponsor has been spending with me (namely on the phone), is much of an investment for her recovery as it is mine. Lucky, I agree with you in the sense that I do feel brainwashed and that I'm a member of a secret club. Yet, as Young at Heart stated in one of her past messages, "You can take what you need, and leave the rest behind". I have to be proud of myself in that my replases are becoming less and less. I sincerely thank you ladies for your comments on this matter. -Reenie

[sammys]

AA Meetings

Lucky and Young at heart are so right you certainly do not need to feel bad about her feelings right now, and no it is not her job to save everybody( I feel that she should have been there for you and been more understanding not parental). You are not perfect NOBODY is. I have great faith in you right now that you will do what is right for you.

Sammys