Reframing

[amethyst]

Last year when I was AF for 3 months, I did it using the tools learned from Rational Recovery. The self talk went along the lines of * I will never drink again, and I will never change my mind*, said over and over, like a mantra of sorts. I said it walking by the wine displays in the grocery, and all during the day. But what I am learning more and more, is that what you focus on, is what you get. And even if you don't want something, by focusing on *it*, and the not wanting of* it*, *it* is what you get. So by my focusing so many times a day on NOT drinking, I was still focusing on drinking. Does that make any sense? (I have not tried the hypno cd's yet-I need to know how the suggestions are framed. Are they I will nots, or I am healthy positive type statements? )Any thoughts on creating a postive and better directed statement? I keep trying, but tripping up on what I DON'T want still. What I want is to be strong, healthy, smart, and sober. Is that enough to say?

I am working on taking the supps more consistently. And focusing on the ones I really need, rather than a whole kitchen sink approach. Actually, I think the more is better mind set effects me in all areas of my life-not just alcohol. I have more than the average 2 kids, WAY more dogs and cats, I tend to over indulge in popcorn ,and chips and salsa as much as I do wine. My extra 20 pounds isn't all wine I am beginning to think that the physical is only a small part of the whole picture. It is the why did I drink in the first place, what was I trying to replace, or what feeling was I trying to numb , blunt, or erase? Who am I without the glass in my hand, and how do I feel ?

So, enough ponderings for the day, on with the daily. Enjoy your day!

[bear73]

Reframing

really insightful post - I have asked mysefl the same questions.paul mckenna is a hypnotist/nlp practitioner in uK and he says exactly that.
focus on what you want not what you want to move away from.

i'm always saying i want to lse weight rather than i want to be slim - need to try to reframe it.
i've been trying to do positive affirmations as i am quite low for no reason at all at the moment - i actually have tonnes to look forward to.
anyway thnaks for getting me thinking

[sally114]

Reframing

I too have listened to Paul Mkenna and do believe in reframing. This is the second time I have tried to go AF and this time is so different( 12 days today). I can feel that deep down there is just such a positive feel to it - I tried to do the 'I can make you thin' but in terms of alcohol with some success so am looking forward to my CDs arriving. On the other hand am attending weight watchers with my daughter to help her along and can tell I am going to fail that one miserably! - just not the same positive attitude.

No wonder we fail so much, not only are we our worst critcs we keep on giving ourselves bad advice too!

[Cashregister]

Reframing

Hi all,

I had this problem with AA - obsessing about not drinking replacing obsessing about drinking!

This time round (on day 31 AF) I have noticed a real difference. I don't think about it, I don't want a drink and I don't not want a drink. I just feel good, healthy and calm, and knowing what alcohol does to me, why would I have a drink - it just seems like a pointless excercise - why give up feeling good to feel bad.

Most of the time I am just not focused on it - it's not an important part of my life - why give it that immense status.

I know one should be vigilant and that this is an insidious drug we are talking about, but I think that can easily result in having the thought in the back of you mond all the time - to drink or not to drink.....

It may well be medication that is helping as well - I am not superwoman!

Cheers

Cashy