2013-LET'S DO THIS!

[Struggles 106]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

IRRITABLE

Oddly this afternoon I ma feeling very strange. Irritable and angry for some reason.

!!!! I think I'd better go out for a walk

[Kradle123]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

I really feel for you regarding your sisters :l but I saw this sign a long time ago and never forgot it...Our family is the friends we make along the way..

:l

PS- I think I will just buy a big month to month with inspiring pucs and put my kids gold star stickers on each day I wrack up!!

[Kradle123]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

Alcoholic;1434872 wrote: Kradle:
Sorry to hear that you came from such a negative environment... My parents pitted us sibling against each other as well...so totally can relate. Your kids are lucky to have you as their mom as they are learning to love each other instead! You deserve all the best!

Thanks for sharing that AL :h

I always was mystified by what my parents did and really just thought no one shared that experience. I think they pitted us against each other because they didn't like each other very much.
I doubt they even knew they were doing it to be honest...

Those are my girls in the Avatar. Trying to find one with all three of them but the girls are in the ' Boys!! Ugh Cuties' phase. :H

:l

[FlyAway]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

Kradle123;1434817 wrote: Hey Ann:

Where can I get a Calder that is the one page showing the entire year?? I have never seen them...not that's have really looked.

I love the Jerry Seinfeld idea!! Obviously worked for him. :new:

:l

Do you have a Staples store near you? I think a place like that or Office Depot would have them.

[Kradle123]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

Ann Carolina;1434894 wrote: Oddly this afternoon I ma feeling very strange. Irritable and angry for some reason.

!!!! I think I'd better go out for a walk

I think it's thinking about our pasts Ann... Always starts to rattle my heart if i revisit stuff too long.
I'll join you on your walk. Mind if I bring the dog?

:l

[Struggles 106]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

WALKING

Bring the dog Kradle-I gotta get out for a bit!

[Struggles 106]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

BACK HOME

Phew! Back from my walk. This afternoon was a perfect example of the kind of day that would prompt me to go to a bar. Not sure why.
With the antabuse it's out of the question but it was strange. I would like to think that I can be strong without the AB but for now no worries.

I walked by a guy in his driveway drinking a beer. Just the thought of it was rather sickening.

And Hippyman-I wonder what the stats are on kids from alcoholic homes. In my case we had 7, and 4 are alcoholic and 3 are not. Interesting

[Tipplerette]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

Ann Carolina;1434894 wrote: Oddly this afternoon I ma feeling very strange. Irritable and angry for some reason.

!!!! I think I'd better go out for a walk

I hope you have picked up your mood, Ann. The doggies must be a nice picker-upper. Wish we had one.

Thanks for mentioning about the anger. This is weird but maybe it's a kind of withdrawal but i have found in the past few attempts at abstinence that my usually Pollyanna outlook (they make fun of me for it; i am so sweet..gag).takes a nose dive when i abstain. i don't say what i think most of the time but my thoughts are negative and angry which bewilders me. I just hope that's not who i am beneath the booze... Yikes.

[RunningCourage]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

Tipplerette;1434946 wrote: I hope you have picked up your mood, Ann. The doggies must be a nice picker-upper. Wish we had one.

Thanks for mentioning about the anger. This is weird but maybe it's a kind of withdrawal but i have found in the past few attempts at abstinence that my usually Pollyanna outlook (they make fun of me for it; i am so sweet..gag).takes a nose dive when i abstain. i don't say what i think most of the time but my thoughts are negative and angry which bewilders me. I just hope that's not who i am beneath the booze... Yikes.

Hi Tipps... What you describe is similar to what I'm experiencing a bit just now. I too hope it's not who I am beneath the booze, but if it is I'm sure it's a me that is damn well easier to sort than if I was drunk or depressed or just persistently chugging round a hamster wheel of drink and hangovers.

Personally, i believe I'm not the negative person that sometimes takes over my thought patterns. However I do think that i've repressed a lot of stuff through AL and perhaps don't know how to deal with all my feelings or interactions with some people or situations. My hope is that if i can carry on with being AF that in due course these things will be dealt with, ironed out, worked through and eventually, gradually the me I think I should be (the content me that is comfortable being me) will emerge... It's just one moment at a time, with half an eye on the long term.

[prose]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

Hi everone,
I made it through day 2 yesterday, almost through day 3!
I too get those feelings of anger etc sometimes when I abstain, I don't think it is who you are beneath the booze, I think Runningcourage is right, it is the repressed feelings seeping out a bit. For me, I get those same feelings, although not often, when I am drinking. And it is not pretty. At least if I get them when I am not drinking I have more control and don't bring up s--t from 15 years ago to whomever is around!
But everyone has good days and bad days, so I think it is important to let yourself "be" when you are feeling bad.
I can't believe how many bright, warm, funny, and intuitive people are posting here. So if some days we are a little pissy, well so be it
Take care everyone!!!!
Prose

[FlyAway]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

Great job Prose!

[Struggles 106]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

SELF-MEDICATION

Without alcohol for self-medication clearly we will go through a lot of changes. And it will not be easy sometimes. But that is what the struggle is about-using other methods to cope.
I know that quitting smoking is going to be interesting to say the least. I will be happy when Friday is here and I will be nicotine-free for several days so the physical part starts to go away. I fully intend to run a 5k this summer. I used to run a lot and run fast, not I just want to finish in an upright position. LOL

I am hoping everyone has a good week. Tomorrow night I will be home safe where I need to be. I hate to think of all the destruction due to drinking that will occur just because it's New Year's Eve. I will worry about my daughter though I know she will not be drinking to excess.

Tomorrow is a brand new day...til then my friends

[shelbysmiles]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

Day2 coming to a close. I've had a pretty good day except for a lingering headache. I can't remember how posted this above but it was about not waiting until Jan 1 to start. I totally agree. I do not want the first day of the new year hungover in bed. We are going out to friends house tomorrow but I will safely sip on soft drinks. While the hosts do not drink our other friends do. But strangely I'm not concerned. I did have a friend ask me out for a glass of wine tonight. I politely declined saying I am drying out because I have had a bit too much cheer this holiday season :-) instead I'm making minuscule cookies with my daughter in her new easy bake oven...

[Kradle123]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

Ann Carolina;1434945 wrote: Phew! Back from my walk. This afternoon was a perfect example of the kind of day that would prompt me to go to a bar. Not sure why.
With the antabuse it's out of the question but it was strange. I would like to think that I can be strong without the AB but for now no worries.

I walked by a guy in his driveway drinking a beer. Just the thought of it was rather sickening.

And Hippyman-I wonder what the stats are on kids from alcoholic homes. In my case we had 7, and 4 are alcoholic and 3 are not. Interesting

It was that sort of day here too Ann. The dogs had a lot of fun at the dog park but I think they got a lot more excersise than I did :H

Tonight I've been roaming the boards, reading and watching star trek...not certain why I am so antsy tonight...end of the holidays I guess :l

[Tipplerette]

2013-LET'S DO THIS!

Shelby, good for you for being around it and staying strong. I am telling people I am not drinking because I'm sick of it. And that's the truth.

Day two over and out here too. Not tempted at all but that's par for the course. At the beginning of my abstention attempts I always feel like it's easy. I usually then think I've beat it and get cocky which leads to an eventual lapse in judgement. Very aware of that.

This anger thing is interesting in that I, actually didn't think I had any anger in me and because it's an emotion I don't feel often, it almost feels like a nasty person lives in my head throwing out sarcastic comments and snide remarks. These are those "feelings" I am going to have to deal with sober aren't they?? No wonder I drank. I hate conflict. Abhor it.

Part of my journey will be to attempt to bring spiritual insight and serenity into my life and to set healthy boundaries while not getting emotional. I want to learn to stand up for myself calmly but forcefully.