Feeling down

[Serenity]

Feeling down

Nattie - thinking of you babe!, I'm so proud , tonight was hard for me also. Went to supermarket and got fizzy water, pineapple juice and lime, put it in a fancy glass and toasted to a no hangover tommorrow.

Currently have not told hubby what I am doing - he won't really care as long as he can continue to drink!!!

We really can do this - the only person who can sabotage this is ourselves!!!

Gabby - I admire you and see you as a role model - you are so much further across the bridge than I am but I can feel the warm glow and the laughter and know that it is a better place that I am headed for.... (5AF days) first sober Friday in a god knows how long!!
Melon - wise words again you reach me!!

Love
S

[Serenity]

Feeling down

Must also add - Fan your amazing wise, philisophical words and quotes etc dumbfound me.
What a guy!! You are so much further in you journey than I am that it inspires and frustrates me that I can't make time go faster so I can be 3mths AF then 6 , then 12- although impatience is one of my least favourite virtues - leading to irritablity and frustration!?!

Do you give lessons? - could teach my hubby a thing or too (although love him dearly).

Love
s

[momof2boys]

Feeling down

Hi Nattie,

I have been feeling the same as you lately, it is hard to be around people that are drinking.
I love coming to mwo and reading the posts, they are always so possitive and reassuring.
I find one thing that has been helping me is drinking decaf tea at night, it is soothing for me. All the best for the weekend, I know you can do it.
Take care.:l :h :l

[nattie]

Feeling down

Hi
thanks for all the encouragement last night. I done as I planned, had bath, made tea ( I will take on board the de-caff thing in future) and waited for BF to slip into alcoholic coma. STILL didn't drink his bacardi, was catching up on triple bill of Ugly Betty which I am usually too pissed to watch. Great so far, then he went to bed. So I thought I would just finish off his drink he had left, make me realise how disgusting the stuff can taste. Not so, I then had another & then another (smaller than the last 2 admitedly). Then felt crap - I had 4 days under my belt, had done things at work I hated & began to feel a whole lot better health wise. Why does this happen?!??
This morning I noticed Amazon had delivered my book - I had been so ready for failure I hadn't even checked the teetering pile of post when I got in. I suppose I know in myself I lack self confidence & last night really proved that to me. I felt a failure at lunchtime & I let it take a hold as I felt I wasn't strong enough to get the better of it. Had I noticed the book last night I could have started on it & felt a whole lot better & more positive. I do feel bad today but not half as bad as I felt last Monday when I found this place - I know it is a blip and maybe after the week I had had this wek has been easy as my body really did need a rest. Week previous was 3 vodkas and coke on Monday, bottle of red on Tuesday, can't remember Wednesday but there was something, half a litre of voda on Thursday (oh & a bottle of wine before 11am....I had a days holiday), Friday bottle of wine before lunch (off again) and 2 glasses in the evening, Saturday box of wine between us, Sunday wine before breakfast, Pimms in bed in the afternoon & then 2 bottles of red between us in the evening. Hence this week has been easy in the fact I don't think my liver would have coped with much more.
I have loved the feeling of waking up this week feeling ok - haven't slept too well but no headache.
This morning doing the housework I took a quick shot of left over bacardi from last night, then panicked he would notice & watered it down. Hairdressers at 1pm & spent the time trying to read the book (discretly) and panicking he would notice the lack of kisk to his bacardi. All ok now & I hope tonight can go a bit more smoother.
Love to you all as you are my life line at the moment.

xxx

[gabby]

Feeling down

Nattie, just go back to your thoughts of yesterday and start again.
hugs...

[nattie]

Feeling down

thank Gabs, your post of yesterday really inspired me & i keep going back & reading it. I think after last week I felt so sick I needed to test it one more time, last night. Still the same old shite & nothing I am missing out on, just need to get my head round that one.

xx

[gabby]

Feeling down

I know.....did that too. Seems like sometimes ya have to for a little reminder. You can do it Nattie. Just pick up and give it a fresh go. : )

[Serenity]

Feeling down

Nattie
Thanks for the update - have done that before - and felt s!!!t the next day!! but it is a learning experience - it is a trick that our addiction plays on us - it will tell us anything just to have a drink.

Heres to tommorrow and another day!!!

Love S

[Kimmy]

Feeling down

Lord. I don?t know of all the problems my friend has, but you know everything. I hear her silence, you hear her pleads. I see her laughing, u see her tears. I see when she gives, you see what has been taken from her. I see her beautiful appearance, you see the scars in her soul. I experience her faith, you Know her doubts. I bring her to your throne and ask - Lord give her everything that she wants. Thank you Lord - I love her very much Amen

We are here for you - I know that having someone there to hold and touch and talk to to hear a voice is better - but you do have someone near you just hold out your hands and he will hold it for you.