Tawny & Nicey :H:H:H
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February Undies and Friends
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February Undies and Friends
nicelife;1463047 wrote: I love that word.....S.E.R.I.O.U.S.L.Y......Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog its too dark to read
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February Undies and Friends
techie;1462818 wrote:
Would love updates:
? Mats Galore
? Wiggles Room
? Barbed Wire Caper
o Weird Santa
o Dirty Old Men
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February Undies and Friends
Nicey - :H:H:H
The Wiggles story cracked me up and distracted me from the 6 7 year old boys hurtling down my drive way on skate boards and squealing simultaneously :H:HNever give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn
Harriet Beecher Stowe
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February Undies and Friends
tawnyfrog;1463057 wrote: So, we've ticked the first three. Bridge - please provide details of Weird Santa and I think Dirty Old Men is a collective contribution, non?
Hmmm sleazebag Santa??I may be able to satisfy both categories....
Some years ago a group of drunken middle aged mothers from the local primary school, myself included, assembled at a nightclub for the first time in 10 years and began gargling wine and behaving like suburban shrews.
This behaviour drew the attention of several unsavoury characters of whose presence I was largely unaware, as my vision had begun to tunnel and mist around the outer edges for reasons that we on this forum are only too aware.
At some point in the witching hours I apparently struck up a conversation with a stocky, bespectacled gent who was somewhat amused by my penchant for table dancing and the rotation of items of clothing over my own head, helicopter style.
This portly Lothario?s name, details and in fact my entire memory of him escaped me by closing time. No doubt he at some stage appraised me of his profession, of which I no doubt took copious piss?.but who knows?
Several days later, and in the spirit of that vile season, I succumbed to pressure and accompanied the boy to source a generic Santa on whose knee to sit anon.
As planetary alignment would have it, the boy?s boney arse landed on that self same Santa?s knee in a neighbourhood much better known for prostitution and meth dealing than Christmas cheer.
Now you will concur Undies that nightclub Santa now had the identification advantage, he being in full Santa drag and all. One may even conjecture that the average full blooded Australian man would deign to conceal his identity at all costs in this particular circumstance. Non?
Non.
Not this Santa.
This Santa took full advantage of this festive opportunity to attempt once again to procure my phone number and an imminent first date.
Snatching the boy?s lolly covered hand I beat a hasty retreat in absolute certainty that I recognised his face from Today Tonight or Australia?s Most Wanted.
Crisis averted non?
Again, Non?.
Fate, and a temp community nurse position would bring me regularly back to the area to distribute various medications to the local wildlife through a free clinic. And at each and every turn, I encountered nightclub Santa??
On one occasion he abandoned duty and left a line of shrieking two year old incontinents and their harassed parents to loiter outside the medical centre. Very disturbing for folk abusing substances and already challenged by reality.
Then the roses and santa shaped chocolates began appearing at reception.
At one point I swung into the food court only to see nightclub Santa observing me from afar.
In an attempt to feign nonchalance he leaned casually against the escalator which naturally enough gave way under his elbow and flung him head long against an information board and nearly knocked him cold.
Have you ever counted the exact amount of merchandising weeks in the official Christmas period Undies?
I have.
It is exactly 246.
It was a looooong Xmas. At least that?s what the security guard said when I eventually had to have a quiet word.
I roolly ROOLLY wish I was making this shit up.If your 8 year old self met you, would they be proud?
Rejoined life 20/5/19
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February Undies and Friends
Ah, poifect. Vintage Jones.
If loving Jonesy is wrong......i don't want to be right.
There's a package for you on your doorstep. And there'll be another waiting for you at your IT and associated studies course reception. No sleazy santa's gonna out stalk me.
G'day Reg! *Waving*
* ^^ *
G'night Bridget, noight all.
'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'
Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-
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February Undies and Friends
byebyebridgetjones;1463104 wrote: Hmmm sleazebag Santa??I may be able to satisfy both categories....
Some years ago a group of drunken middle aged mothers from the local primary school, myself included, assembled at a nightclub for the first time in 10 years and began gargling wine and behaving like suburban shrews.
This behaviour drew the attention of several unsavoury characters of whose presence I was largely unaware, as my vision had begun to tunnel and mist around the outer edges for reasons that we on this forum are only too aware.
At some point in the witching hours I apparently struck up a conversation with a stocky, bespectacled gent who was somewhat amused by my penchant for table dancing and the rotation of items of clothing over my own head, helicopter style.
This portly Lothario?s name, details and in fact my entire memory of him escaped me by closing time. No doubt he at some stage appraised me of his profession, of which I no doubt took copious piss?.but who knows?
Several days later, and in the spirit of that vile season, I succumbed to pressure and accompanied the boy to source a generic Santa on whose knee to sit anon.
As planetary alignment would have it, the boy?s boney arse landed on that self same Santa?s knee in a neighbourhood much better known for prostitution and meth dealing than Christmas cheer.
Now you will concur Undies that nightclub Santa now had the identification advantage, he being in full Santa drag and all. One may even conjecture that the average full blooded Australian man would deign to conceal his identity at all costs in this particular circumstance. Non?
Non.
Not this Santa.
This Santa took full advantage of this festive opportunity to attempt once again to procure my phone number and an imminent first date.
Snatching the boy?s lolly covered hand I beat a hasty retreat in absolute certainty that I recognised his face from Today Tonight or Australia?s Most Wanted.
Crisis averted non?
Again, Non?.
Fate, and a temp community nurse position would bring me regularly back to the area to distribute various medications to the local wildlife through a free clinic. And at each and every turn, I encountered nightclub Santa??
On one occasion he abandoned duty and left a line of shrieking two year old incontinents and their harassed parents to loiter outside the medical centre. Very disturbing for folk abusing substances and already challenged by reality.
Then the roses and santa shaped chocolates began appearing at reception.
At one point I swung into the food court only to see nightclub Santa observing me from afar.
In an attempt to feign nonchalance he leaned casually against the escalator which naturally enough gave way under his elbow and flung him head long against an information board and nearly knocked him cold.
Have you ever counted the exact amount of merchandising weeks in the official Christmas period Undies?
I have.
It is exactly 246.
It was a looooong Xmas. At least that?s what the security guard said when I eventually had to have a quiet word.
I roolly ROOLLY wish I was making this shit up.Outside of a dog a book is mans best friend. Inside of a dog its too dark to read
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February Undies and Friends
Morning all,
Orf to the coalface today and tomorrow.
Neices birthday tomorrow, she's 15. Wondered what to get her when a book appeared as i was reshuffling hoardage. 'Wisdom of our times' in as new nick. Not as cheesy at it sounds. Lot's of positive quotes collected through the ages. Not a bad life companion reference manual.
Run out of sunflower oil, so gonna swish a bit of castrol gtx for half an hour or so.
'ave a corker everyone.
'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'
Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-
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