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    Day 3 - again

    I had a good run. I didn't drink for 32 days - felt great, slept well, lost weight, exercised, so relaxed. Then I blew it - I went back to work - a bottle of wine with dinner 4 nights in just over a week. I'm an introvert - I'm fine being around a couple of people but find the dynamics at my workplace, office politics, drama kings and queens, too much to deal with. Just the noise of it all, the pace, unsettles me. Being around drama doesn't invigorate me, it has the opposite affect, I feel like I need to detox. I've tried to change jobs but they're laying people off, unemployment is high in my area. I know I need to be grateful just for having a job. I feel lost. My son's left home recently and I'm living alone for the first time. I've lost my confidence. My life isn't fulfilling and it's really difficult to know where to start to fix myself. People around me seem to have it all together. This is so hard - I have no family support, it's just me. I've started my herbs and exercise again, I guess it's a start.

    Jane

    AF since 01.02.13

    #2
    Day 3 - again

    HI JANE

    I sense so much self-awareness in your post. Clearly you can see the things that bother you. As for the other people having it together, I have found that his is not always the case. I think this is part of our thinking, in relation to comparing ourselves to others. Never a good idea. Everyons has their problems, addictions and secrets.
    I have ceased (finally) to be amazed when I find out that the ones I thought were most together were just like me. Self-doubting, self-critical and riddled with insecurity.
    I live alone too (for the most part) and I have started liking it. It can be hard I know.
    Maybe you don't have to "fix" yourself. IMO you are ahead of the game when you recognize what's happening as you do. Many people roll along follwong an agenda that they are unaware of. The unexamined life...

    Hang in there!

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      #3
      Day 3 - again

      Thanks for your kind words Ann - I will continue to make small steps towards my goal of feeling better :-)

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        #4
        Day 3 - again

        You aren't your job, so don't let it define your life. Work so you can have a life, not the other way around. It's up to ourselves to make our lives fulfilling. Being an empty-nester affords you new opportunities since you no longer have the responsibility that comes with having children in the house. Find a cause to volunteer for. Pick up a new hobby you've always wanted to do, etc. The possibilities are endless.

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          #5
          Day 3 - again

          Keep trying no matter what. One day soon it will stick for good. I quit for two years and then went back. 18 days since I quit again and I just know this will stick. Good luck.

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            #6
            Day 3 - again

            thanks IKnow for your support, quitting isn't in my nature, I want this so much. PS, I love your username

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              #7
              Day 3 - again

              G'day Aussie girl, and a big welcome to you!

              Thought i'd post this link to our toolbox if per chance you haven't discovered it yet.

              Lot's of useful tips, strategies, and inspiration. Essential reading.

              https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html

              Best wishes on your journey. Go for it.

              G bloke.

              'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

              Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

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                #8
                Day 3 - again

                Hello and welcome from a fellow Aussie.

                Check in here as often as possible, keep us up to date on how everything is going. We are here to support you. We know you can do it as so many people before you have done it. I myself am on day 29 and feeling fab!

                One day at a time.
                If drinking is interfering with your work, you're probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you're probably an alcoholic.

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                  #9
                  Day 3 - again

                  Hi AussieGirl
                  Our circumstances sounds very similar. I'm also dealing with issues around a frustrating work environment and adjusting to empty-nesting. I think you'd probably be surprised at how "untogether" a lot of other people are - we probably look together from the outside too!

                  I'm also on Day 3. We can do this!
                  There's two ways of looking at the holes in your shoes
                  You can dig the ventilation... or you can sing the blues

                  I didn't come this far to only come this far.

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                    #10
                    Day 3 - again

                    Loads of strengths for this time,Best of luck !!
                    Dix:h:l:h
                    A learned habit surely be unlearned !!

                    2012: Continuous AF for 7 months from May to Oct.

                    Big Relapses : 6th November and 12th December 2012.

                    2013 : So many ups and down !!

                    2014: Has a conviction to stay with a healthy life.

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                      #11
                      Day 3 - again

                      Wonderful positive messages, I'll definitely check in more often . . . such great advice and I'm not alone.

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                        #12
                        Day 3 - again

                        Aussie Girl, It is a nice name and reflects my mindset. You have to keep trying. When got out of the Hospital when I had pneumonia I couldn't drink because it lowered my immune system 30 days turned into 60 days then 120 for two years no alcohol. Then I blew it and spent a year just drinking socially with food but then it escalated. I could see where I was heading and decided to quit on my own. Called my Dr and he helped me with meds and support. I know it will stick this time because I really want it. You will want it also. Good luck.

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                          #13
                          Day 3 - again

                          Hi jane ,

                          Just want to send you good wishes , i have had slips myself recently.

                          But i have had good stints of sobriety and it really does get easier and your life will improve SO much when you remove alcohol from your life.

                          All the very best

                          Damo in dublin
                          Still trying !!!
                          AF 25th June2014

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Day 3 - again

                            Hi Ozzie... I also am in the same boat, son has just left etc. Empty nest syndrome? Bollocks! He is off go start his fabulous independence and you, yours. Embrace your space. Being alone doesn't have to represent being lonely. Enjoy your own company. Listen to music, read a book, take up a sport. Plan a trip O/S. Alcohol is the easiest form of selfmedicating but not the best. For me, I love my newly found independence all over again. Work? Be brave, front the issues and rise above them. Look for a new job if
                            you have to. 'Life is like a wild tiger, you can let it drag you through life kicking and screaming. Or, you can climb upon it's back and ride it!' Easy? No! Exciting? Yes. You only get one shot at this life. And... I have no idea where I stole that quote from. Get living Honky Tonks :-)

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                              #15
                              Day 3 - again

                              Just wanted to say hi AussieGirl & :welcome:
                              You won't be alone around here...lots of great support & caring people 24/7, and as you can see lots of others in the same boat.
                              I look forward to seeing you around more.
                              Formerly Angelcakes, new name, new attitude.

                              Comment

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