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    #1

    Truth Telling

    I was thinking about my posting patterns since I have arrived onto the scene here at MWO. I know for many of you it is getting through each day AF that is the most pressing challenge, and I admire you all so much for facing that struggle.

    As someone who doesn't drink daily, I am noticing that my greatest challenge, and the strategy that will ensure my greatest success, is in telling the truth to myself and to others about what I am really like when I am drunk. It is easy, sometimes, with distance to erase the memories of my embarrassing behaviours. Getting really drunk once a week can sometimes make it easier to get drunk again once you have some distance from it. I think now I want to be able to keep reminding myself, what THAT DRUNK actually looks like when I think about how much "fun" it will be to go and have a drink with my friends.

    I tend to be a fairly open person at heart, and I probably have a tendency to reveal way TMI about my life, but for me at this stage, staying honest is the thing that will keep me on track.

    So, thank you for bearing with me, and if anyone needs to do their own truth telling I am a good listener.

    Cheers to you all, LJ
    Tags: None
    #2
    Truth Telling

    Good post LJ.

    I wasn't able to stay sober until I became 100% honest with myself. Sometimes maybe I share TMI too, but it really happened and it's embarrasing, but that's the way it is. If I don't acknowledge my inner-monster, it will somehow find it's way out again. But knowing it's there I can keep it under control. Pretending things in the past didn't happen doesn't make them go away.

    I appreciate your honesty! I think you're on a great path for long term success. Thanks for sharing with us!
    :heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:

    Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.

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      #3
      Truth Telling

      I think there is no such thing as TMI in this anonymous environment. Spill your heart out, we've heard some variation on most of it.
      My life is better without alcohol, since 9/1/12. My sobriety tool is the list at permalink 236 on the toolbox thread under monthly abstinance.

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        #4
        Truth Telling

        Hey LJ-
        I know what you mean but I think truth-telling is always the best way.
        Also google binge drinking dangers and check it out. I was st once a week at one time and believe me it does get worse. It's the nature of the addiction

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          #5
          Truth Telling

          Ann, yes. Hallucinating and talking to myself are not good indicators of where I am headed if I keep drinking.

          But those aside, unsafe sexual practices, losing days of work, ruining relationships, etc. should have been enough to make me stop.

          Curiously, one of the sites I was just reading says binge drinking is not typically classified as alcoholism. I am quite surprised by that. It should be! I have even had arguments with friends about this. They just tell me to stop at two, and that my problem is just mind over matter. NOT. If it was that easy, I would have done it by now, because who would ever WANT to drink to the point of oblivion if they could help it? LOL

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            #6
            Truth Telling

            I just wanted to add that one of the devastating things about alcoholism is the constant feeling of failure or being innately flawed as a human being. That somehow we are lacking in character or moral fibre when it really (especially given what has been discovered here with the use of drugs and supplements) is a brain chemistry thing. I really believe that MWO and all the work being done on this site (and elsewhere) is quite a breakthrough in changing that thinking.

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              #7
              Truth Telling

              ljeanner;1470333 wrote: I just wanted to add that one of the devastating things about alcoholism is the constant feeling of failure or being innately flawed as a human being. That somehow we are lacking in character or moral fibre when it really (especially given what has been discovered here with the use of drugs and supplements) is a brain chemistry thing. I really believe that MWO and all the work being done on this site (and elsewhere) is quite a breakthrough in changing that thinking.
              I have come to the conclusion that people with AL problems are not flawed individuals. We have however been wired a little different in the noggin. I also dont think it makes us weak by any stretch, surely nobody would ever wish to have a problem with AL.

              Surely nobody would "choose" to ever be in our shoes. Thats why I dont really have any problem telling people about my stance on AL
              Living on Planet Sober since 05/02/11




              DAREDEVIL COOKIE MONSTER

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                #8
                Truth Telling

                ljeanner;1470333 wrote: I just wanted to add that one of the devastating things about alcoholism is the constant feeling of failure or being innately flawed as a human being. That somehow we are lacking in character or moral fibre when it really (especially given what has been discovered here with the use of drugs and supplements) is a brain chemistry thing. I really believe that MWO and all the work being done on this site (and elsewhere) is quite a breakthrough in changing that thinking.
                Hi, LJ:

                Thank you for the honesty. One thing about feeling ashamed to be an alcoholic is that I do try to think whenever I feel shame is no one is perfect in this world. Even my biggest idols have secrets and faults that they feel shameful about. Ultimately we are all human beings and there's no one here or anywhere who is perfect.
                Alcoholic (or Ally)

                "Only a fool knows everything.
                A wise man knows how little he knows."

                Please feel free to block/ignore my posts through your control panel.

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                  #9
                  Truth Telling

                  HYE LJ

                  I'm with Nelz-just different wiring in the noggin. Something I just thought about today, in terms of why some people are and some are not-
                  WHY for example is it true that I, having been exposed to and used nearly every drug you can think of, NEVER had a problem stopping any of them-except alcohol.

                  Of course this I will never know and it does not matter at all. It is what it is.

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Truth Telling

                    ljeanner;1470333 wrote: I just wanted to add that one of the devastating things about alcoholism is the constant feeling of failure or being innately flawed as a human being. That somehow we are lacking in character or moral fibre when it really (especially given what has been discovered here with the use of drugs and supplements) is a brain chemistry thing. I really believe that MWO and all the work being done on this site (and elsewhere) is quite a breakthrough in changing that thinking.
                    The first time I fessed up and went for help for my AL prob I got pretty p-od because all the counselor and I did was talk about my lack of boundaries and the fact that my pain meds were not doing anything, therefore leading me to AL for pain relief (I had major back problems). I was AL for 6 months 'cold turkey' by sheer will alone. I was doing EXACTLY the same things but without AL, however I switched from AL to espresso (which you can also go to substance abuse treatment for as it alters brain chemistry and is addictive).
                    Anyways, stuff got to me eventually, and no matter how I worked on my boundaries, I still live in a rather stressful household, and I have a lot of past trauma etc. and dates/anniversaries so I started drinking again. Not so much at first, and I kinda had to force it down, but eventually it became my friend/foe again.
                    So as I was searching for a miracle because I knew I had to change I found this site and its holistic approach and I knew I had hit gold! When I went in to my shrink she had never heard of it, and it had never occurred to her to make sure I was eating healthy and check on my overall health to help me get off and stay off AL. I think I would have had a better chance the first time if it was so. I hope that more practitioners will become aware of this site and program and suggest it to their clients. I also hope to promote this site and other holistic approaches to anyone who will listen! Why not supplement the nutritional deficits caused by AL and get the body getting better so the mind can follow?
                    :earth: Tree23

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                      #11
                      Truth Telling

                      I guess we may be wired differently.....but, honestly I don't think we are all that different. We all deal with it in different ways. Some people drink, do drugs, eat or work themselves to death.

                      Honestly....it is all strange to me. And Saddening. I work with several people...who have an eating disorder.....I also work with several work-alcoholics. While I think being a work-alcohic would be be better...those are the people all alone...with no one in their life.

                      We travel a path. Being an alcoholic is not the worst thing in world....because you can stop it on dime. Hard and not easy....but we all know the truth.

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                        #12
                        Truth Telling

                        Thanks for sharing Tree. I think your post just confirms to me that there are a lot of misconceptions out there about alcohol and drug abuse. And yes, most often within the medical and mental health community. I worked for a clinic in the core neighbourhood where I live, and there is a lot of both going on, but IV drug use in particular. Many of the doctors I worked with were specialists in this area, and I learned a lot. One of the docs said that 80% (based on those who had revealed) of his IV drug use patients were sexually abused (he expects is closer to 90%). There hasn't been a lot of (or any) studies done, but it's most revealing, I think. If it was simply a matter of "controlling" or "stopping" then there wouldn't be so many people who struggle with this.

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