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    #61
    WHY do you drink?

    Sweetie, I totally related to your post

    Like you, I drink because it's sociable and relaxing, and I enjoy nice wines, I have a great life as well (a job I absolutely love, a caring husband, and great friends), yet at times I can't stop once I get going and will binge drink and black out as well

    Have you given any thought to why you you exhibit this pattern of behaviour?? Just curious..
    I have finally come to the realization that I need to be AF as I haven't been able to find ways to "turn it off"
    On a mission, and the only option is success. My family and I deserve a better life, an AF life.:h

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      #62
      WHY do you drink?

      I cant figure it out for the life of me. it usually happens around certain people, drinking buddies, always happens if I dont plan.. the only way I can drink responsibly is making a decision to drink and planning out how much... but if I start casually-then i do things that trip me up, like thursday- i had two bottles of wine open at the same time, had them in the livngroom, not in the fridge, so i didn't have to make a decision to go get more... if I decide to drink consciously i plan how much i am allowed and put non AL drinks in between, the danger is when i think im okay again and let my guard down. It's nice to hear someone else with a similar situation.. I know a lot of people who drink to cope or feel better, and I'm a really happy person... which makes it so hard to understand, when everyone around me says you can drink, just not so damn much... and I cant.

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        #63
        WHY do you drink?

        I think I am a combo between Inchy and Tipp:

        Drinking became my only coping mechanism after starting out socially and then simply liking the numbed out, relaxed feelings. And after 20plus years...which from my perspective is the same as Inchy's having now spent almost half my life (I'll trade you for your seven, Inchy ) drinking and do not know myself sober AT ALL. :egad:

        I also absolutely hate thinking about all those mistakes and bad decisions as well. I loathe it! And thinking I have hurt anyone sends me into a tail spin because of all the self loathing!! So off I go to drink, to not face         (cope) all the crap I have caused through drinking which sends me off again into the self loathing phase so I can drink again to cope...:nutso:

        It really does become a circle doesn't it?
        On My Own Way Out Since May 20, 2012
        *If you think poorly of yourself, you can fail with a clear conscience.
        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f11/tool-box-27556.html tool box
        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f19/newbies-nest-30074.html newbie nest

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          #64
          WHY do you drink?

          HEY SWEETIE

          I can relate. I just want to say though that maybe it's not important to put a label on the behavior.
          You could say "binge drinker" or "alcohol abuse" or "alcoholic behvior" or any number of things. But isn't the bottom line that it's bad? It's a problem?
          As I always say I'm no expert, but I believe that binge drinking becomes more frequent. The situation progresses, typically.
          The other situation you describe-PLANNING- could also be called moderation. Which then begs the question-Isn't that lot of energy to put into it? NO OFFENSE to the moderators here please-but it seems to me that a simpler thing to do would be just to quit.
          If you factor in the fact that alcohol does no good physically whatsoever then what's the point? I fooled myself for years thinking that I only drank maybe once a week and that makes it OK. There are several myths floating around that can be used to pretend it's not destructive. For example-I never drink in the morning, or I never drink alone, or I never black out. Oh well-just give it time. These lovely outcomes can all be yours if you just give it enough time.
          And everyone around you can say you can drink just not so much, but really? You know your own reality. They don't.

          Don't mean to be harsh-just throwing in my $.02. I know that for me it's all or nothing so I choose nothing.

          Comment

            #65
            WHY do you drink?

            I think thats how it is for a lot of people, maybe even me because so far i havent been able to moderate. I think its that everyone around me drinks, and a lot of people i know drink responsibly.. and it is a lot of effort.. but somehow i dont feel like quitting entirely is accomplishing as much as regulating and having enough control to moderate.. I can go AF for long periods of time but thats just not drinking, for me i feel like its a bigger challenge to moderate, one that i have not met. I feel like getting back to a socail norm is worth a lot of effort... but if i keep stumbling idont know...

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              #66
              WHY do you drink?

              I have heard of, and know of, people whom we think are drinking responsibly. But, you know how some of us can have one glass or two at a dinner out...but the only way we can do that is because we have a secret stash at home.

              Perhaps people we know who seem so responsible have the same routine? Maybe they are also struggling in secret like some of us. Just a thought.

              -S-

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                #67
                WHY do you drink?

                I feel like half my friends are really honestly responsible drinkers, partner included. They dont drink evry time they go out, and when they do its max 3 drinks, though usually only one. but then i hve a bunch of friends who are alcoholics and when i talk about quitting entirely they dont support it at alll... i told one friend i had to get sober, we work together, and they invited me out to a late night event at a bar... on a work night. another friend just told me i will want to drink on my upcoming birthday and i should wait to go AF ....

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                  #68
                  WHY do you drink?

                  i've learned I cannot moderate. Therefore I don't have the first drink.
                  BHOG
                  BHOG

                  ?Alcohol removes inhibitions - like that scared little mouse who got drunk and shook his whiskers and shouted: "Now bring on that damn cat!"-Eleanor Early

                  Comment

                    #69
                    WHY do you drink?

                    I agree with last straw

                    There are lots of people who SEEM to be in control, and they are not.

                    I would presume that anyone encouraging you to drink does not have your best interest at heart.

                    Comment

                      #70
                      WHY do you drink?

                      AC-
                      Only you have your best interests at heart!
                      BHOG
                      BHOG

                      ?Alcohol removes inhibitions - like that scared little mouse who got drunk and shook his whiskers and shouted: "Now bring on that damn cat!"-Eleanor Early

                      Comment

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