I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

[Patrick]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

[QUOTE=Scandinavian;1492719]Hello everybody, and thanks for the many thoughts you have shared


I am still sober, ..please stay that way.... I still don't feel like drinking, .....then dont.......

What I really was hoping for with this thread was for someone to convince me to have my vacation sober. ..................only you can do that...


moderate. . If I could do that then I wouldn't even be on this forum......you said it buddy

, but I have so much respect for AL now that i think I might be able to restrain myself a little bit ...dont kid yourself if you could you would KNOW

[jenniech]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

can't we all just get along?

[Glass Half Empty]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

Scan
I can't convince you to have a sober vacation, although if I knew how to do it I would try.

What concerns me more is that you're planning to drink again once you get home.
If you honestly see it as a good thing to be sitting at home alone drinking, then what's going to change a few days later to make you want to stop? From your original post, it seems as though what you're planning when you get home isn't moderating, it's just an excuse for a complete binge. Do you really want to start another Day One after that?

Good luck with whatever you decide.

[K9Lover]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

Did you really think one of us could convince you?? When I drank, nothing or nobody could have changed my mind. You already had your mind made up when you posted this thread. Sorry we don't have a magic bullet. Getting sober takes HARD WORK and being willing to do whatever it takes, not a few words on a screen and a sprinkle of fairy dust. Either do or do not....as the wise Yoda said.

[Byrdlady]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

Wow....8 pages of really solid advice here from folks who have been where you are. I think that one of the great benefits to age is that I finally don't have to learn everything the hard way. We did try to talk you into being sober for your vacation, but AL already had you in its grip. Addiction will never die as long as you feed it. Learned that the hard way myself. Good luck with your efforts, whatever they may be. B

[FlyAway]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

Scandinavian;1492719 wrote:
What I really was hoping for with this thread was for someone to convince me to have my vacation sober. I knew that would not be easy, as I had pretty much made up my mind.

No you didn't make up your mind, alcohol made up your mind for you. Getting sober involves regaining control of your mind which you clearly don't have.

[free at last]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

Scan,
I often describe my relationship with alcohol as "an affair", unfortunately not "An Affair to Remember" but rather one to learn from and get over. When I read your posts, it makes me think that although you have been AF for 14 weeks, you are not quite ready to end your relationship with alcohol.

As someone who would be thrilled to have 30 consecutive AF days, I am baffled by your thinking and tried to find one upside to drinking during your holiday. The best I could come up with is that your future wife should know that drinking is part of who you are, or who you were. She may even learn that you consider alcohol enough of an issue that you take antabuse to avoid it.

While your actions are clearly your choice, may I suggest that before do go back to what you have worked to avoid--and may result in a long detour away from sobriety--I hope you will consider what you gain and may lose when you take that first drink. You believe it will be relatively easy or straightforward to go back to a sober life, which is what you indicate you eventually want. For myself, and I think most people who are consciously choosing to live an AF life, it is not so easy in the early months of our journey. Whatever, may you have a joyful, mindful, memorable holiday.

To the MWO community who responded, I thank you for taking the time to share your thinking with Scan. You don't see a lot of posts from people who moderate, perhaps that is because they don't regularly come to the website. Those of you who regularly post on this website, do so because you know how devasting alcohol has, or can be, to our lives and want us to learn from your experiences. Thank you!

[kuya]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

Brilliant post Free !

When I got sober for the first time it was really easy....I innocently thought I could have ONE DAY off. I took eight months to get sober.

My kids were mortified, I was terrified but could not quit again till I was even more ill.

Scan...people lose their spouses, their kids, their jobs and their lives rather than quit....even when they HAVE quit before for extended periods.

You think a little white pill you take voluntarily will save you? Your alcoholic brain WILL find ways to stop you.......OMG, what am I talking about? It already did !!!

[Scandinavian]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

I have some thoughts that I want to share with you all, that are not directly related to my vacation, but in a way it is.


1. I have not drunk since January 2nd or so, and from what I can tell, for me it takes about two weeks to get over the "Shit! Its afternoon! I need to drink! This will be a bad day without alcohol!"-thinking.

2. The pretty extreme urge to drink in certain social settings and other "drinking inducing situations" (e.g. bars, clubs, etc.), lasted maybe a a month and a half. I did actually spend some time in these places sober to socialize.

3. After about two months I had changed my life so much that I almost don't feel any need to drink. Weekends can be used for sports, work, etc. Never drinking again ever does not seem to involve being a loner that stays inside most of the time.

4. I now 100% know that because I have not drunk since January that I can live the rest of my life completely and perfectly happy if I never ever have a single drop of alcohol.

5. When I look at all the people I know I realize how much average people drink. Most of the people I know drink every weekend, and many drink two or even three times every week. This makes me, (in a bit of a childish way), feel that I am a pretty "grand" person, and I like to flaunt about the fact that I do not drink. Actually I am proud of it. When people ask me "Why don't you drink? Were you an alcoholic? Do you have a medical condition? Do you drive? Are you Muslim" etc. I just answer, "I just don't drink, its pretty sweet!" (which many anyway will translate to me being an alcoholic).


Anyway, I will not be writing here for the next weeks, but if and when I return safely I will provide you all with a comprehensive review of what my (slightly stupid) "plan" resulted in.

[Patrick]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

Sorry for being blunt scandi but that has to be the most self deluded and to use your own words stupid idea I have ever heard.To say you can say you could live perfectly happy without a drink ,to be af for 14 weeks,and then to decide to drink for no good reason and considering YOU said yourself you dont really want to is just plain daft imo.You said you were hoping people would talk you out of it ,did'nt take their advice and still you think its a good idea?.What are you trying to prove?

[jenniech]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

everyone has their own journey.
I hope his turns out ok.

[MonaCat]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

Let us know how this works out for you. Some good advise here for you, but only you know what you can handle. Best of luck.

[MonaCat]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

Let us know how this works out for you. Some good advise here for you, but only you know what you can handle. Best of luck.

[supermario]

I NEED HELP! 14 weeks 100% sober. Now I am planning to drink in my vacation.

Scandi, let us know how your vacation goes, you seem like a nice, honest person, I hope you have a blast!. I thank you for your post because I am also going on a trip in 2 months.. I do not want to or plan to drink, I am actually praying that I don't because i know that it'd ruin everything. My wife has said if she sees me taking a single drink, she and the kids are coming home immediately. I don't blame her, we've been married for 20 years and I've put her through a lot.. Oh my wife didn't mind me drinking 20 years ago, we went on many vacations where AL was king and we had great times for sure.. so I'm sure your girlfriend will have an amazing time too, getting drunk at the airport?.. I'd drunk by the time we got to the airport! Specially during the last 5 years of my drinking career..
Anyhow, knowing what happens after your vacation will be useful to some of us, so please keep us posted.

[Byrdlady]

Bump.