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    #31
    MY NEW APPROACH

    Another successful day yesterday. I feel stronger by the day. Hubby is drinking less too by osmosis so I am doing us both a favour. Playing the keyboard and knitting like a maniac. I have the office more organized than ever and the house cleaner than ever so I can hardly wait for whatever life throws my way.:h:h:h:h:h
    Tipplerette

    I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

    "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
    ? Lao-Tzu

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      #32
      MY NEW APPROACH

      YAY Tipps! You sound great! You can come clean my house next ok??

      I am constantly switching obsessions too. LOL First it was crochet, then it was going to the thrift store (I literally went EVERY DAY...Yikes), now it's the gym. I need to work on finding a "balance"...but hey, at least it's not 14 beers a night anymore!

      You know how I clean my bathroom? I turn out the light. LOL

      Keep up your great work Tippy!!!
      :heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:

      Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.

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        #33
        MY NEW APPROACH

        I'm so proud of you Tipp I am busting out all over like June!

        No what you mean about the split second decisions: close call in Walmart of all places but had only ten minutes to pick up Matt from basket ball and there was a hugely long line in the their Alcohol Alcove so pushed my cart on past...Nothin' to see here folks!

        :l
        On My Own Way Out Since May 20, 2012
        *If you think poorly of yourself, you can fail with a clear conscience.
        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f11/tool-box-27556.html tool box
        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f19/newbies-nest-30074.html newbie nest

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          #34
          MY NEW APPROACH

          Kradle - My Walmart doesn't have alcohol YET. They are expanding and will have it soon. The sad thing I used to do was pick up my prescription for Antabuse, but grab a 12 pack (at the same store) and figure I'd have "one more" night before starting the AB. And THAT is why I've been on AB for 3 years but sober (continually) for only a little more than ONE!
          :heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:

          Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.

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            #35
            MY NEW APPROACH

            You sound so clear and strong, Tipper. You're doing it right. Great job.
            "Remember, you are responsible for creating your life by every thought, action, choice. Choose well." Oprah Winfrey

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              #36
              MY NEW APPROACH

              Tipplerette;1495126 wrote: Can't say there haven't been close calls though.. this warped mind of mine sends split second decisions and then words to my mouth that I utter before I really think... Like "if you order a bottle, I'll have a glass." Then I have to backtrack... So I am not out of the woods yet by any stretch of the imagination.
              I was just catching up on your thread and these words struck a chord with me.

              It seems to me that every minute of every day is a string of decision making, the power of each decision simply rests in the importance we BELIEVE them to have.

              This morning I woke and DECIDED to sleep in ( it is Sunday )... I had thoughts last night of an early start and housework.....oh well.

              When I got up I DECIDED to add sugar, rather than the sweetener to my coffee ( I am reducing calorie intake)

              I have now DECIDED to have a lazy day ( though I must finish a tax return that I DECIDED to leave all week)

              At nearly eight months sober I may or may not have a thought of drinking today.......they are getting few and far between.......it will hold very little power and I can ALMOST guarantee that I will DECIDE not to drink.

              That lack of certainty seems, at first glance worrisome, but it is that drinking is now firmly a random thought for me. I am hopeful that it will always remain so, but it can never be certain.....because I am a free person that can CHOOSE. I don't fear that I CAN'T drink, I don't fear that I WILL. I am no longer afraid of alcohol, only a healthy fear of returning to hell.

              Every day that I decide to exclude alcohol from my life I become stronger and the desire becomes weaker. The thought does not scare me any more.

              I would suggest that fear of 'that thought' turns quitting into obsession and the thoughts become as compulsive as the drinking was.

              I have thought, written and read about alcohol and alcoholism many times a day for eight months........it is losing all power over me.

              I am no more likely to drink alcohol now than I am to stick a knife in an electrical socket. I am many times more likely to drive, at least a short distance, without a seatbelt buckled.

              It has only taken eight months to reach this place of peace after twenty three years of compulsion.

              I hope it works the same way for smoking !

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                #37
                MY NEW APPROACH

                I hope and I feel certain that alcohol will lose it's pull on me within months. I have no problem abstaining lately but have been there, done that and, inevitably it's weak moment of 'decision' that usually sends me back to day one. I never start day one the day after drinking.. it takes weeks before I am ready to tackle the issue again. At 56 I don't have all that much spare time to go around this merry-go-round continuously, there is too much living to do. So being vigilant ALWAYS, even when it's easy. Thanks Kuya, your post is a keeper.
                Tipplerette

                I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

                "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
                ? Lao-Tzu

                Comment

                  #38
                  MY NEW APPROACH

                  Tipplerette;1497985 wrote: I hope and I feel certain that alcohol will lose it's pull on me within months. I have no problem abstaining lately but have been there, done that and, inevitably it's weak moment of 'decision' that usually sends me back to day one. I never start day one the day after drinking.. it takes weeks before I am ready to tackle the issue again. At 56 I don't have all that much spare time to go around this merry-go-round continuously, there is too much living to do. So being vigilant ALWAYS, even when it's easy. Thanks Kuya, your post is a keeper.
                  Vigilance is essential at the beginning, triggers are frequent yet unpredictable.

                  At three months happily sober I took my first swim of the season and BAM! I was hit by a massive desire to drink. It actually made me cry. Then I realised that the association between having a swim, feeling good and then 'rewarding' myself with alcohol had never been challenged. Once I realised the connection I was fine. The next day I swam and felt nothing.

                  We are nearly the same age.......once you are safely sober life will, once again, be this huge potential of joy and achievement. Just hang tough for a little while Tipps, not long now

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                    #39
                    MY NEW APPROACH

                    Like your signature, I want to be reborn too. Alcohol is always in my life. At least four nights out of seven I am with hubby who has a few glasses of wine or a beer or with friends and family who all drink; some to excess. Tonight I was with my 80 year old uncle and he and hubby had a few glasses of wine. I felt really content (I keep using that word but that's what i am feeling lately) sitting there chatting with no buzz. I feel still inside somehow. Hard to describe.

                    Like your swim, Kuya, there will be triggers; this summer when everyone is down at the beach, Beach Boys blaring, frisbees flying, burgers on the grill... that's when I will crave a drink. Hopefully I'll have enough time under my belt to laugh it off...
                    Tipplerette

                    I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

                    "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
                    ? Lao-Tzu

                    Comment

                      #40
                      MY NEW APPROACH

                      Tipplerette;1497995 wrote: Like your signature, I want to be reborn too. Alcohol is always in my life. At least four nights out of seven I am with hubby who has a few glasses of wine or a beer or with friends and family who all drink; some to excess. Tonight I was with my 80 year old uncle and he and hubby had a few glasses of wine. I felt really content (I keep using that word but that's what i am feeling lately) sitting there chatting with no buzz. I feel still inside somehow. Hard to describe.

                      Like your swim, Kuya, there will be triggers; this summer when everyone is down at the beach, Beach Boys blaring, frisbees flying, burgers on the grill... that's when I will crave a drink. Hopefully I'll have enough time under my belt to laugh it off...
                      Tipp, tonight was so weird. Hubs went out to get some subway sandwiches for the kids because we are all so tired from today's activities and i thought just for a minute how nice and relaxing a glass would be and id love to ask hubs to swing by the store as he was out and about. then the strangest thought popped in my head that I was envious of you because you could ask your dear hubs to pop out to the store or the wine cellar or wherever and he wouldn't bat an eye....mine would pack up and go to a hotel...uch:

                      Isn't that just Odd? But you obviously don't have any desire ad I am s so proud of you. Here I am a world away and I thought about asking your hubs to swing by the store! :H
                      Well not excacly your hubs :H

                      My mind is a strange place to dwell these days.

                      :l
                      On My Own Way Out Since May 20, 2012
                      *If you think poorly of yourself, you can fail with a clear conscience.
                      https://www.mywayout.org/community/f11/tool-box-27556.html tool box
                      https://www.mywayout.org/community/f19/newbies-nest-30074.html newbie nest

                      Comment

                        #41
                        MY NEW APPROACH

                        Hey Kradle

                        Your post reminds me-a while back when I was having a "slip" (like in November) and after my bf had expressed how happy he was that I would not drink...I asked him to bring home beer. He said NO.

                        I was a little surprised but glad really. I guess my shenanigans were worse thatn I thought, in terms of his perception. So now still on a roll for 2013

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