who am i?

[treetops]

Just saying hi Pauly - dont get anxious about getting anxious!
As Byrd said - also anxiety is part of the course when coming off AL. Insomnia can be a bugger too. And dealing with emotions and life stuff without the AL.
I do think in your situation you get a lot of trouble from your family thrown at you. So thats where trying to find a way to deal with this might help. I know thats not easy. Talking it out can help though so even if its just posting here, thats something. Are you back into your walks/exercise - as I think that also helped as well.
Take care

[Byrdlady]

Another thing I need to add is,I always get hesitant to write when I'm craving,I don't want people to be like"yawn,here we go again!"however I realize that is the whole point of being here duh,I'd rather post that then yet another relapse.

This is war, Pauly, and to heck with anyone who yawns at your cravings! Reaching out and getting over those rough edges is what always did it/does it for me. Please don't ever think we are too battle weary to help, we're all in this together and we aren't happy until we get everyone out of that hole!
Hugs, Byrdie

[fennel]

Pauly, ...we all know how crappy alcoholism is on this forum. We all love you and won't judge you. Heck, we've all been there, or are still there. :hug:

Have you ever tried any relaxation techniques for your anxiety?

[paulywogg]

Fen,this was a physical anxiety, that's why suspect that it was something I took,I've been using a combo of a few anti anxiety/mood things just trying to see what works and I think something tripped my wires up,that and allergy spray that's bugged me before but didn't seem to this time so I kept using it,I use a self hypnosis on YouTube to relax but I just wanted to rip the guys face off this time haha

[lizker]

Hi Pauly, have you ever tried tea? A combination of black and green tea has really, greatly helped me with my anxieties. I was a nervous, anxious wreck who could not go into certain rooms as I was developing some crazy phobias. Since quitting, the anxiety and depression are virtually gone but I know how you feel. I know there's a lot of advise to go the pharmaceutical route but the natural route can be just as beneficial or better. If you follow my link, on the starting out site, I have documented how a shake has literally given me my life back. This stuff is doing something to the neurotransmitters that is really working to calm nerves down and end depression. The Ultimate meal shake. The taste is not for the faint of heart but it will save your sanity. I am only sharing this because I know how it has helped me and anyone who is struggling deserves all the knowledge that can help. Hang in there Pauly. You are in my prayers

[paulywogg]

Thank you Liz,I've been meaning to ask what the name of the shake was,I'll Google it,I too believe in going the natural route,unless of course meds are absolutely needed, I think I need to just stop making excuses and deal with hard days,screw alcohol!!

[paulywogg]

Just got back from seeing Michelle, damn Ilove that kid! She sseemed to be ok aside from the giant captain Morgan bottle on the table and the weed she smoked while we were chatting, she had been messaging me for a few days to come by,I figured I'd take her a coffee and see how she was, I can wish until my wishes run out that shell clean up,get a job,maybe get married and have babies someday but for now I just hafta accept and love her for who she is,after all,she did that for me I guess

[NoraC]

Pauly - I'm so glad that you saw Michelle. I know how you worry about her. :hug:

[fennel]

Just got back from seeing Michelle, damn Ilove that kid! She sseemed to be ok aside from the giant captain Morgan bottle on the table and the weed she smoked while we were chatting, she had been messaging me for a few days to come by,I figured I'd take her a coffee and see how she was, I can wish until my wishes run out that shell clean up,get a job,maybe get married and have babies someday but for now I just hafta accept and love her for who she is,after all,she did that for me I guess

Geez, Pauly...I'm not a mom, but I truly feel for you. I'm glad you had a nice visit with Michelle nevertheless.

[paulywogg]

Thanks you guys everything will be ok,maybe not right away but everything happens for a reason ya know?

[paulywogg]

Was gonna start a no smoking thread but there's too many threads as it is,Tuesday 5 real cigs,Wednesday 5 ,today 4,using my e-cig in between but sometimes I need a real one so far,I'm sure my body has to get used to less nicotine so slow it goes,bought a berry flavored one today I'll try it when the vanilla one is empty,I think quitting smoking is something that I need to do to avoid relapsing, its something I haven't tried before in my quits,I can do this oh,I was smoking about 15 to 20 cigs a day depending on what was going on so 5 a day is pretty goddam good

[fennel]

Was gonna start a no smoking thread but there's too many threads as it is,Tuesday 5 real cigs,Wednesday 5 ,today 4,using my e-cig in between but sometimes I need a real one so far,I'm sure my body has to get used to less nicotine so slow it goes,bought a berry flavored one today I'll try it when the vanilla one is empty,I think quitting smoking is something that I need to do to avoid relapsing, its something I haven't tried before in my quits,I can do this oh,I was smoking about 15 to 20 cigs a day depending on what was going on so 5 a day is pretty goddam good

Pauly, five cigs a day is an awesome improvement! As an FYI, I know two people who quit smoking by using e-cigs/vapes. Good for you, girl!

[paulywogg]

5 real cigs on Thursday

[Lizann]

You go girl! That is huge!

[paulywogg]

5 cigs today,was worried cuz its my day off and idle hands ya know?but I got this,btw the berry flavor sux!tastes like extra strong kool-aid