who am i?

[Alky]

who am i?

Pauly, have you considered trying any other meds? I was basically in the same situation as you. I could manage short durations AF only to fall off, and like you said, I'd feel so bad when I woke up, the only thing that made me feel better was to take another hit off the bottle. Anyway, after my dad died last month, I went on an extended bender (I'm not even sure how long it was - probably around two weeks give or take a few days), but then I had to get it together to plan his funeral and settle his affairs, so I finally broke down and saw a psychiatrist who prescribed campral and trazodone. The campral, combined with a desire not to drink has pretty much made me indifferent to alcohol, and the trazodone relieves anxiety and helps me get to sleep at night. Anyway, just a thought. I also wanted to say, as you said, this is your quit. You don't have to justify yourself to anyone.

[paulywogg]

who am i?

hi alky,the ironic thing is i have a script for campral,its been sitting in my medicine cabinet for a while,i wanted to do this on my own but apparently i need a little assistance,besides ill pound al like its water,but with meds i look at EVERY single side effect and get scared off,so stupid really!

[Alky]

who am i?

Pauly, if it makes you feel any better, I find the side effects of campral to be minimal. It's not mood altering and the effects are very subtle - I almost questioned whether or not it was doing anything until one day, lo and behold, I found myself indifferent to alcohol. I noticed it stopped other compulsive behaviors as well. The only side effect I had was the diarrhea and that only lasted a couple of days. Also, you can start and stop it at will - no tapering required. I think it's a good drug.

[InChains]

who am i?

hey pauly - I wrote whatever the hell I wanted in my journal, as you know. it's not about making friends, but you will find people will stick with you if you're honest, even if you say things they disagree with. The key with writing this is its you, make it honest and heartfelt without fear, nobody will judge you, if you are honest in your struggle those who follow you will in turn be honest in the help, advice and care that they give you.

There is nothing weak in taking meds, incidentally. I thought I was gonna be tough, stick it out just me, this forum and nothing else. Guess what? there is no more honor in doing it that way than taking something, making your journey easier so that you can take a few extra steps down the right path. Suffering through cravings, letting withdrawal rule you is a choice, some people would rather do it that way than seek help - but don't let it hold you back. Make how you quit a choice based on one thing and one thing only - how much you want to be sober. do not allow the pain you feel from going af to be your punishment for slipping up.

I'll be keeping an eye on you pauly, I know you can do this.

-Inchy

[Wagoneer]

who am i?

InChains;1502930 wrote: hey pauly - I wrote whatever the hell I wanted in my journal, as you know. it's not about making friends, but you will find people will stick with you if you're honest, even if you say things they disagree with. The key with writing this is its you, make it honest and heartfelt without fear, nobody will judge you, if you are honest in your struggle those who follow you will in turn be honest in the help, advice and care that they give you.

There is nothing weak in taking meds, incidentally. I thought I was gonna be tough, stick it out just me, this forum and nothing else. Guess what? there is no more honor in doing it that way than taking something, making your journey easier so that you can take a few extra steps down the right path. Suffering through cravings, letting withdrawal rule you is a choice, some people would rather do it that way than seek help - but don't let it hold you back. Make how you quit a choice based on one thing and one thing only - how much you want to be sober. do not allow the pain you feel from going af to be your punishment for slipping up.

I'll be keeping an eye on you pauly, I know you can do this.

-Inchy

Agreed, Inchy!!!

[hadit]

who am i?

Pauly, Thought I would throw my bit in in regard to AB. I took it last year and had some success but thought I could mod and of course I can,t and never will be able to. I am an alcoholic and now realise that IF I don,t stop drinking I will probably die an earlier death. No one wants that. AB is a drug not to be messed with,but for many its the only way out. My doctor informed me today AB has been around a long time and is still the most effective drug. Not sure if thats true but for me it will be a great tool. You do have to be totally committed though to stopping because drinking on AB even weeks after stopping the m ed is Dangerous, very!~Good Luck with whatever you decide.

[hadit]

who am i?

Pauly, Thought I would throw my bit in in regard to AB. I took it last year and had some success but thought I could mod and of course I can,t and never will be able to. I am an alcoholic and now realise that IF I don,t stop drinking I will probably die an earlier death. No one wants that. AB is a drug not to be messed with,but for many its the only way out. My doctor informed me today AB has been around a long time and is still the most effective drug. Not sure if thats true but for me it will be a great tool. You do have to be totally committed though to stopping because drinking on AB even weeks after stopping the med is Dangerous, very!~Good Luck with whatever you decide.

[treetops]

who am i?

Pauly I took AB for a while at the beg of my quit almost 7 months ago. I was also worried about side effects. I was very careful and did not drink AL with it. It gave me some space to learn new patterns. I saw it as a choice for abstinence not as a sign of weakness. I coped with a lot of other work pressure when I started AB as well. Now I have stopped the AB and love the freedom of being sober. Just make sure you don't drink any AL when on the AB.
Good luck. !!!!!!!

[paulywogg]

who am i?

yeah i will ask my dr.for antabuse probly,those binges have got to stop! i finally managed to pull myself out of this last binge thank god,but its weird 1st day was funnish,listening to music hangin out,til i puked and peed my pants,nice,2nd day woke up with a huge headache,drank a little on and off all day trying to rid hangover ended up drunk again,3rd day drinking to feel better,never did,4th day wondering since i started again how am i gonna stop,5th day alright,im done cant do this anymore,my stomache was queasy,mouth,throat,eyes dry,cant sleep for shit,just going through the motions of life hate it! so i quit,lots of tension tamer tea,cigarettes,melatonin officially on day 2 of this weird cycle,i was reading kuyas biorythym thread it interests me cuz i think there is some definite cycle,be it the moon,periods whatever! all i know is in my journal no matter how many days ive had sober,i always relapse the week before i get my period,its like im just not thinking straight,weird

[paulywogg]

who am i?

btw,ive pinpoited the date of my next weak time and im gonna be on guard! i cannot keep quitting before the"magic"happens dammit

[kuya]

who am i?

Pauly, get some evening primrose oil and GABA for that week before your period.

What you ( and ALL women who are still menstruating ) need to realise is that being premenstrual is NOT NORMAL. If we lived as nature intended we would be pregnant or breast feeding PERMANENTLY ........therefore PMT is a disease that needs treatment ( ask ANY married man ! :H:H:H)

Or you could go to the dr and get a long acting implant to block all these up and down hormones ........ You need help with this Pauly

[Patrick]

who am i?

Kuya ,my wife does'nt suffer from PMT she gets PMT.I'm the one who suffers
from PMT.:H
Pauly ,great thread and I love both your honesty and your determination.I never needed AB or any other form of help in that way but that does'nt make my quit better than anyone elses.It does'nt matter how you quit as long as you do.You always come across as being way happier when you are on a quit so maybe you should give the AB a shot and see what happens.The worst thing that could happen from what I can see is that it will reinforce your determination and you will stay sober like you obviously want. :goodjob:

[kuya]

who am i?

Patrick;1503735 wrote: Kuya ,my wife does'nt suffer from PMT she gets PMT.I'm the one who suffers
from PMT.:H

:H:H:H

PMT......Pain Men Tolerate

[dixon]

who am i?

paulywogg;1501351 wrote: well this will be my journal,in my time at mwo i would have NEVER had any days sober without it,so this is my journal,dont read it if your struggling,dont read it if your super sober and judgemental,just dont,its my quit and ill update daily weekly,whatevs

Dont say like this darling !:h:h:h

[paulywogg]

who am i?

so i swore id be honest on my thread but i really hate admitting this,i chose to drink today,i fought it,i tried some of you can identify with that ugly,flat mood you get a few days sober?i just couldnt fight the icky mood! i was irritable,nervous,snapped at somebody elses client for rapidly non-stop slapping a comb against her haircut cape,you know that noise of keys-jangling when someones impatient?it was like that plus 10! and these women who know theryre getting haircolor,which takes time of course bring their 2 and 4 year olds! common sense people,ugh i didnt want to drink,all the support on this site and patrick giving me support when hes a man of little words whom i respect,and kuya gives me support even though i was an ass to her,shows you what stand up people they are! and im just a mess! i just wish i could feel o.k,im not expecting perfection,well maybe thats my problem,i expect to quit for a month and ill be slim,happy,productive etc,my longest af stint of 40 days in jan/feb,it was some days elated,some days"fuck this" and 40 days really is just a chip at the iceberg,i should have just kept on,but i didnt,now look at me struggling yet again,maybe im just meant to drink,my mom does everyday,and shes gonna be 63 this year and in good health,hell who knows,i certainly dont