what finally made your quit stick?

[paulywogg]

Also, I know if I'd not have stopped by the gas station and drank, the next day would have been wonderful, that's what always happens when I don't give in, the next day is almost euphoric I'm so happy with myself

[sunshine_gg]

The words "I give up. I need help." Then, a phone call to AA and my first meeting the next day.
Never ever thought that AA would be my thing... after all, I wasn't like 'THOSE' people. But, what the hell do I know?
God knows, I tried it on my own, tried it with MWO, but, it never did stick. Coming up on 3 years now... I'm far from becoming complacent but, I do believe that this one will stick.

[paulywogg]

Sunshine, I do think I'm gonna try AA again, my addiction counselor, nutrition, exercise, some supps I've been researching, I've been doing the same thing over and over and I guess it's just not working, well obviously it's not,your quit is sticking it's not complancement it's confidence in yourself I think

[NoraC]

Pauly - Love you :hug:

I highly recommend this site. It has really helped me. She also has a 100 day sober challenge and you can even sign up for personal e-mails, etc.

Tired of Thinking about Drinking

[NoraC]

I mean as another tool........along with AA, etc

[stirly-girly]

I'm a fartface my quits aren't going to stick, cripes I've been here for 4 years and some things have changed, some not,I can't pat myself on the back for a few fucking months then go back to the same old behavior, I look like a fool, I'm so ashamed, embarrassed,just down right tired,I didn't want to post on my regular threads cuz .. I dunno, I don't even want to post this but tomorrow is absolutely my last day one(until the next one)

Hiya Pauly!

First of all, let me say that the length of time you are here is irrelevant. The thing that counts is that your are still here. That means that you still want to give AL the boot. That is what counts. I joined in December of 2009 and finally got sober in October of 2015. That was just short of 6 years. Something finally clicked, it's as simple as that. (Don't think you have to wait another two years tho'.)
Something else I wanted to add - about the feeling tired part. I remember when I first joined MWO and dear JackieClaire took me under her wing (as she has so many other struggling members), I asked her what made her quit and she said "I was sick and tired of feeling sick and tired". And now that I'm finally sober, the difference is priceless! And you have already experienced what a difference it makes when we have even just a few days under our belt - how much better we feel both physically and mentally.

Today wasn't day 1 I wanted it to be but..just trying to figure out why I keep relapsing, I'm happier sober, I look at Louies little toys around and I feel sad cuz he loves me so much and I want to be a rock for him,to be here for my husband, be able to be someone to look up to,I KNOW that I'm a great person I absolutely know without a doubt that I'm giving, loving, helpful, cute but when I drink I'm absolutely none of those things, I'm selfish, undependable,unpredictable,ugly, lazy, unhappy, etc,why do I lie to myself thinking that a drink episode will be different this time? It's never different, it's unpredictable what kind of drinking session you'll have, is it a happy buzz or a sad buzz where you sit on the couch crying? How will I feel the next day? Like Shit 100% of the time! That part never changes,just venting but I can since its my thread, meh, I'm tired of being like this.. it's not the REAL Pauly

Pauly, you may have heard this before but I am going to say it anyway because I truly believe it. We may think we want to quit for our children, our partners, our family, our friends, but until we really, truly want to quit for OURSELVES, it's not going to happen. We have to want to feel better, look better, function better, live better FOR US. Not for anyone or anything else. With very few exceptions, we are all good people but we have this damn alcohol problem/issue, say it how you will, that prevents us from being our true selves. Alcohol distorts us, our personalities, our behavior, our relationships. But we can change all of that, we can once again find our true selves, not that person who is drowning in a bottle. You CAN do it but in my very, very humble opinion, you have to do it for YOU.

Also, I know if I'd not have stopped by the gas station and drank, the next day would have been wonderful, that's what always happens when I don't give in, the next day is almost euphoric I'm so happy with myself

Pauly, your words reminded me how many times I said, I'm not going to drink tonight and then "The F-It factor came into the picture and my day one went out the window. I used any excuse I could to say F-it - just one more day and then I'll stop, no one around tonight so who will know, had a rough day so I deserve a drink to relax, I don't feel like I'll be able to sleep tonight, so AL will help me sleep, etc., etc.. You gotta find a way to recognize that before you let it take over your thoughts. When the idea of stopping by the gas station starts to creep into your thoughts, take another route home. Say F-you AL instead of saying F-U to your quit. Don't let the AL thought take over. Change things around in your mind and you will change things around in your life. All for the better. You CAN do this. You have to believe it and do it for YOU!!

Edited to add - and if you think that AA or some other similar group will help you - go for it. Use whatever is available to you to help you. Best of luck!!

[Sunbeam]

I was truly ready to be done. I just looked at the bottles in the recycle bin and I knew it was too much.

[treetops]

Sorry about this Pauly. Lots of good advice here. Here's what helped for me looking back
- not allowing any reason to shift my resolve to quit. When I quit I had a lot of excuses to keep drinking and I had to learn to not let any reason or my mood/depression be a reason for drinking
- getting the hard word (yet again) from the dr about the state of my physical health
- treating my last quit like a military campaign. using any resource (no matter how silly) I had to add to my goal. Treating myself as if I was sick - early nights, good easy food, not worrying about extra chores around the house, not being perfect, saying no to social engagements (the list varies for everyone) - but I did this while holding down my job.
- actually realising that it was so easy (Alan Carr's book helped) - just quit. (but of course its not that easy)
- thinking of AL as a poison
- if I got an urge to go out and buy wine - telling someone in advance and almost locking myself in the house
- and I used Antabuse to kick-start. I didn't use it for long and I hated doing this - but it took the debates out of the question. Most people on MWO dont try it and I know you didn't like it - but it helped me.
We are all different - and I am a lot older than you - and I can't count the number of Day One's over the whole of my lifetime. For me I had to say to myself that it was forever but at the same time I had to use the 'one day at a time'. I am also trying to adopt that attitude at present for non-AL issues in my life.

[sunshine_gg]

:hug: Pauly. I hope you'll come up to THAT DAY - the day where you finally say ENOUGH! - very soon. I truly believe that that's what is needed. Anything else is half assed and therefore temporary.
Lots of people rooting for you, luv.

[Lizann]

Pauly, haven't seen you on the steppers thread, so I came looking for you. Don't beat yourself up about a slip. You are doing so well. Pick yourself up and keep on not drinking. You are doing this :hug:

[abcowboy]

Dreams do come true Pauly, here's something for you....

5pcs-35mm-Lake-Blue-Crystal-Cabinet-Knob-Handle-Cupboard-Closet-Drawer-Knobs-Pulls-Diamond-Shiny.jpg

[paulywogg]

Aww,thanks Cowboy that's actually pretty close to how it looked

[Camryn64]

not yet. waiting for the moment.. want to fix it

[mario]

For me it was just the realisation that I cant do it anymore, just couldn't do it. I awoke one morning and as usual I had left a trail of destruction behind me, I admitted defeat, I acknowledged that I just can t drink no more and that I am better than what I had become.
And then with lots of help I took my first step onto a new path and life...

[Camryn64]

love can be a turning point as I had.. but then there are so many other turns.. so wait n watch