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Hadit 3 weeks today

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    #1

    Hadit 3 weeks today

    Hello everyone, I have reached 3 weeks af today!! I have never been 3 wks alcohol free for a very long time in 4o yrs of heavy drinking. It has been easy somedays hard on others.What I am still dealing with is this feeling of loss. Has any one else experienced this emotion? I feel well but just have this feeling something is missing. Everywhere I go there is booze and I am not keen to join in the fun like I used to when drinking. I somehow need to deal with this emotion. Will it eventuly go? And how long might that take? Thanks everybody. Would love some advice. ope all are doing well.
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    #2
    Hadit 3 weeks today

    hadit;1512104 wrote: Hello everyone, I have reached 3 weeks af today!! I have never been 3 wks alcohol free for a very long time in 4o yrs of heavy drinking. It has been easy somedays hard on others.What I am still dealing with is this feeling of loss. Has any one else experienced this emotion? I feel well but just have this feeling something is missing. Everywhere I go there is booze and I am not keen to join in the fun like I used to when drinking. I somehow need to deal with this emotion. Will it eventuly go? And how long might that take? Thanks everybody. Would love some advice. ope all are doing well.
    Hadit,

    I have enjoyed following you around MWO - what a great job you have done for yourself while supporting others! Congratulations on achieving this Personal Best :goodjob:!

    I was worried for awhile because I felt like I was so aware of not drinking - it seemed like I thought about it all the time. It was in a negative context - about what I could no longer do, what was no longer going to be the same, etc. etc. ad nauseum. Now I still feel like I think about not drinking quite a bit but in a whole new way - about what I don't have to do to enjoy myself, about how great it is not to scheme, hide, worry, and generally feel awful about myself!

    This change occurred over time - it was not a lightbulb moment. It evolved much like my realization that my goal of moderation had changed to one of total abstinence. That happened sometime during the first month or so. The attitude adjustment occurred later, but well within four months.

    We're all different, of course, but given what I've learned about you, I feel confident that if you are patient with yourself and stay the course, the time will come when you do not at all miss what was     and are thrilled with what is     .

    :h NS

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      #3
      Hadit 3 weeks today

      Well done Had!!! Be proud...

      Now, once you get in your head that you really aren't missing out on anything but gaining a new less restrictive life your mood will change. It could take some time. You were drinking for a while so this new change is v.new to you and it will feel a bit 'weird' at first. How long? Who knows my friend.

      How about just immersing yourself in this new way of being and see how far you can take it. One day at a time though. This is a pretty big change BUT an exciting new one - depending on how you perceive it.

      I remember the first wedding I went to sober....it was different but I looked for the positive and tended to do so at other things I started to go to. I did keep to myself in my early days of sobriety, as it was hard to figure out who I was when I wasn't 'enjoying' myself tanked to the brim!

      It will all settle into place - just give it time to be so!!

      Again, congrats on you AF time - AWESOME!!!!!
      It is not what we do, but how much love we put into the doing.
      Mother Theresa

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        #4
        Hadit 3 weeks today

        Well done on 3 weeks hadit. Today will be 3 weeks for me too but i got this far before and more so onwards and upwards. I'm starting to feel well and happier again and could not go back to the dark place of drinking and what it did to me. So far i don't miss it and i hope to start taking up new hobbies. I know it will get tough on my journey but i think this time i have the tools and strenth to do it. I find AA and antibuse a big help along with my higher power as i'm a christian. I wish you and everyone else all the best on your af journey.:l:goodjob:

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          #5
          Hadit 3 weeks today

          Congrats, dear hadit. I am so proud of you. I was with you for awhile, but slipped, and that's why your achievement is meaningful to me. Keep it up, please.
          "Remember, you are responsible for creating your life by every thought, action, choice. Choose well." Oprah Winfrey

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            #6
            Hadit 3 weeks today

            Congrats to you! That is wondrful news
            February 27th, 2013. A New , Successful Start. :h

            When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top!!

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              #7
              Hadit 3 weeks today


              :yougo::yougo:CONGRATULATIONS ON 3 WEEKS AF!!!:yougo::yougo:


              Awesome work! Here's to many more!!

              DG
              Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
              Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07

              One day at a time.

              Comment

                #8
                Hadit 3 weeks today

                THANKS everyone, I really was in need of some advice and what u have given me is just great. I am at work at the moment but will reread all your posts tonight as you have all given me some food for thought. Thanks. I just have to deal with the huge loss when I stopped drinking even though al nearly killed me it is never the less a relationship that has ended. thanks again:l:l:l

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                  #9
                  Hadit 3 weeks today

                  Congratulations on 3 weeks!

                  I remember becoming keenly aware of all of the alcohol advertisements and the constant booze talk when I quit. It's kind of surprising to see how much there is once you stop.

                  As far as getting over your "loss", you are in the process of establishing a new normal. Booze was a part of your life at one point and now it's not. It will take a while for you to feel that not drinking is normal. It took a while to establish the drinking habit and it will take a while to establish the non-drinking habit. Just give it time.

                  And what NoSugar said is true for me too. I don't look at it as a loss. I look at is as a plus that I don't have to deal with the BS anymore! I don't have to drink any longer. What a relief! And I really do mean it. It is freedom when you can fully accept it.

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                    #10
                    Hadit 3 weeks today

                    Well done Hadit!

                    NoSugar, I like your phrasing of the issue - "what I don't have to do to enjoy myself". And I think it was Jason Vale who made the point of how when you were a kid you didn't have to drink to have fun.

                    Today I was watching a movie where people were drinking champagne and I thought, oh that would be nice. I still have that lovely image of relaxing with a couple of glasses of wine. But of course with me after one, that train goes on the express track to Blottoville.

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                      #11
                      Hadit 3 weeks today

                      Hadit - fantastic job!!
                      :moon::moon::moon:
                      Enjoy each moon for each week sober!

                      I know EXACTLY what you mean when you say you are feeling loss....I had the exact same experience. But when I thought about it for a long time I realized I was feeling grief. It felt like I was grieving the loss of a good friend. Come to think of it, booze was probably my best friend. I turned to it when I was angry, I turned to it when I was happy, I turned to it when I was bored, etc. The death of this "friendship" I had with booze is taking time to get over. But with more than 100 days under my belt, I am so much more comfortable without it. I just needed to give time time.
                      I just won't anymore

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                        #12
                        Hadit 3 weeks today

                        Thanks guys,Just read through all your posts again. I drank for all kinds of reasons; tiredness,a reward at the end of a week,how many people do we know that do that? When I was worried,bored,had an argument,met up with old friends,had a new promotion or job, watching a band,when camping,at a wake, a wedding 21st,geez the list is endless and like you Jennie AL WAS my friend for a long long time. I am feeling better today at understanding what is happening. A few days ago the bastard had me thinking this is crap. A few quick thoughts about what al has done to me and reading posts quikley reminded of the HELL al has caused me!!! Thanks again Guys

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                          #13
                          Hadit 3 weeks today

                          I can so relate! Bored, tired, frustrated, worried, angry, happy, finished a project, cleaned the bathroom, did the laundry, WHATEVER ... all "time for a drink!" times!

                          Looking forward to the New Normal.

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Hadit 3 weeks today

                            Thanks Jen, I think you are correct; its a grieving thing. Like any other relationship that ends, it will just take time to heal. Even though it was a bad and abusive relationship I had with al, its still a relationship. Thanks Jen and all you other wonderful guys for helping to clear my thoughts. :l:l Anyone around this weekend to join me in my 4th one AF??

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                              #15
                              Hadit 3 weeks today

                              :welcome: Ness. Tell us more about yourself.:welcome:

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