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Such a fool

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    Such a fool

    HI I have been here many times over the years but am back with a new user name. I am such a fool over the years drink has dominated my life and been responsible for so many stupid mistakes and limited my choices. By that I mean the relationship I have been in have been with the men who would put up with my behaviour when I was drink and no necessarily the ones I wanted to be with. I met a guy at a very low point in my life 3 years ago and married him primaraly because he tollerated my behaviour and offered me love and stability. Well the good news is that my drinking after over 30 years is now not an issue I do not reach for a bottle to cure all my woes. The guy I married has turned out to be a financial disaster who puts his ex wife security before our own. I now feel such a fool as I accepted second best because of my drinking. If I had sorted myself before I met somebody I could have had a relationship based on differant terms. I am not in a position to walk away as I am in my early 50 and been married 3 times beofre I could not stand another breakup and all the lonliness and heart ache attached to it. I just feel so sad and foolish that drink dominated my life for so long. I am beyond upset and have run out of tears.:upset:

    #2
    Such a fool

    hi foolish1, your story makes me sad,we do some dumb stuff when were drinking,you sound like you have the drink under control so change your life for the positive! you are not stuck in your marriage if you dont want to be,you are definitely not too old to start over if thats what you want,just remember you only get ONE life why spend it miserable?hugs to you
    I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

    I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
    Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

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      #3
      Such a fool

      Hi foolish1, first of all welcome back to mwo. Looks like you need support so glad you come back to mwo for support am sure there will be more to come, to give there support. Hang in there your not alone, it hard when we have to face diffcuilt situations without alcohcol. Big :l from me and let us knw how you are later on. what i have been doing is trying to live in the moment and not think even 1hour a head of me. I know it hard. But time does not stay still.x

      Take good care and keep safe!

      Catch22 x
      Formerly known as Teardrop:l
      sober dry since 11th Jan '2010' relapse/slip on 23/7/13 working in progress ! Sober date 25/7/13 ( True learning has often followed an eclipse, a time of darkness, but with each cycle of my recovery, the light grows stronger and my vision is clearer. (AA)
      my desire to avoid hitting bottom again was more powerful then my desire to drink !

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        #4
        Such a fool

        the past is the past, the beauty is, we can live our lives the way we chose to now. you might be stuck in that relationship for a while, but you can make the best out of it. it takes a while to clean up the messes we made when we were out there drinking, but time and wisdom can mend a lot of damage.

        all the best to you.

        and I have been here for years too, under different names...seems to be a thing
        10-06-2012

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          #5
          Such a fool

          That was quite profound. Could not have described my situation better. Best to you.

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