Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

It's a new life!

Collapse
X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 1
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous template Next
    #1

    It's a new life!

    I finally have realized that I have, literally, a new life. A re-birth of sorts. Everything is different. Every thing.
    Without drinking everything becomes far more simple. I do what I HAVE to do-work, grocery shopping etc, and do what I WANT to do (music etc) with constant clarity.
    No lost days, no sickness. No regret. Not only that but I can see the things that I still need to change. I can see the steps to purity, so to speak. Purity in the sense of no pretense, no covering up any parts of me. Just a way of living in the moment, in a real honest way. It is truly wonderful.
    I also realized lately that I am a good mother. I never thought about it much. My daughter and I were recently discussing a troubled friend of hers, and I mentioned talking to the friend's mother about it. My daughter said, "Oh no mom. She wouldn't get it. She's not a good mom like you." I was stunned.
    Then I started thinking about it, and by golly I AM a good mother. I'm pretty sure that my daughter knows she can (and does) talk to me about anything at all without a hysterical response, or judgement. I treat her with respect and get the same back.

    SOOO... hell-it's starting to look like all in all I'm not that bad bad person I always told myself I was. Not by a long shot. And that is priceless.

    Peace and love
    Tags: None
    #2
    It's a new life!

    Hi Ann, great post!

    The thing that resonates with me is the clarity. I've been saying on the army thread how only in the past week or two there is a sense of clarity with my thinking about who i am, who i might be, and what I want to do. Seeing where i have often (always?) compared my life to others and how that instantaneously fills my innards with a sour and knotted sensation... yet, when i simply try to think about what I want to do and what I want to explore and who I might want to be, that knot, that sourness dissipates.

    I'm still very much learning to do....much more work on me and my negative ways of thinking, esp' about myself... but right now (and I so hope not to read back in a month a contradict this!!) i am seeing what many have spoken about here after 6,7,8, months AF. This sense of clarity.

    Yer doing great work Ann! :l

    Comment

      #3
      It's a new life!

      Wow, Ann....besides all that, you are a great friend, too!!

      I am so happy that each of you are seeing and feeling the magic! What I love about my life now is the simplicity and honesty of it. I am easier to maintain!!

      Very good to hear all of these wonderful words! Much love and admiration to each of you!!! Byrdie
      All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
      Tool Box
      Newbie's Nest

      Comment

        #4
        It's a new life!

        Nothing better than rawness and clarity, strange at first but worth more than anything when you get it. Another Bbq social function tonight, felt super cool that I did not *have* to drink as others did, felt great being just me, I mean the real me if you know what I mean.
        Sober since 13th January 2012

        Comment

          #5
          It's a new life!

          Love these posts !!

          One day I want to own that exact same feeling

          Love to all xxx
          Trying again from 22nd September 2014 Keeping it simple. Keeping it real.

          Comment

            #6
            It's a new life!

            Great posts! It is so inspiring to hear about the positive events taking place in your lives as a direct result of quitting AL! Congratulations to all of you! you deserve it! :h

            Comment

              #7
              It's a new life!

              Another thing

              It seems that I have finally FINALLY realized that I am NOT a bad person!
              It seems huge! Always in the back of my mind, when thinking about stuff I've done, is the persistent voice degrading me. Calling me all sorts of things.
              But now-there seems to be some sort of profound realization that this is not the case.
              I'm not sure how this came about.

              It's like I just know that I am not a bad person like I've always thought. It is amazing.
              I can't explain it, but I am happy about it.

              Through much soul-searching and pondering, I finally get that though past behavior can be a predictor of future behavior--this does not have to be so.

              I think also that I've thought a lot about people I know who used to do things that they no longer do. Perhaps when thinking that they are OK now, and never were BAD people-it has extended to this realization that this applies to me as well.

              Seems simple I guess but it is having a great effect. It feels like I can go forward with a guiltless agenda of taking care of myself and proceeding in ways that I know are right.

              Thanks for listening to my ranting. Personal power is a terrific thing.

              Comment

                #8
                It's a new life!

                Made my day to read, great post.
                FT
                AF with a few speed bumps during 2014 & 2015 but will succeed.
                As of 4/12/2014 I have not smoked at all and feel great.

                Comment

                  #9
                  It's a new life!

                  Hey Ann, just wanted to pipe in here, I know exactly what you mean and its brilliant. I thought I knew everything once upun a time, I had this critic running round in my head and I thought it must be true because I knew no better, it fueled everything I did and now its unfamiliar and uncomfortable at times to live for the first time the other way but everytime I burst through another barrier in life with my new way of thinking and using what I 've learned I'm never let down and the payback is brilliant, who knew. I'm discovering myself again or maybe for the first time ever and I love it, I'm opening up, I'm not the person my head was telling me I was, and how lucky am I to have discovered this..
                  That's my two pence anyway and wishing you wonderful future Ann..
                  "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it"

                  Comment

                    #10
                    It's a new life!

                    sugarbeat;1526278 wrote: I'm not the person my head was telling me I was, and how lucky am I to have discovered this..
                    ..
                    Wow Sugarbeat...I need to get to that place. :new:
                    My head runs the show WAY too much.

                    Beautiful post, Ann. Things I need to hear,
                    :l
                    On My Own Way Out Since May 20, 2012
                    *If you think poorly of yourself, you can fail with a clear conscience.
                    https://www.mywayout.org/community/f11/tool-box-27556.html tool box
                    https://www.mywayout.org/community/f19/newbies-nest-30074.html newbie nest

                    Comment

                      #11
                      It's a new life!

                      Sugarbeat-EXACTLY

                      Isn't it amazing? I just feel like I don't have to second-guess myself all the time.
                      I'm OK just the way I am. I don't have to feel bad about myself! It's wonderful.

                      Being sober can be fun! I don't have to drink to be comfortable. I don't have to feel bad about myself. The feeling that my whole family is a bunch of misfits is dissipating.
                      Like the Desiderada-there are always lesser and always greater. It finally makes no sense to compare myself to anyone else at all.

                      AND others do not have some sort of exclusive rights to be happy. I can do it too!
                      And as long as I proceed with my actions reflecting what I know is right, I don't have to think about what anyone might think about it. I can just live.

                      What a relief

                      Comment

                        #12
                        It's a new life!

                        Ann Carolina;1525833 wrote:
                        I also realized lately that I am a good mother. I never thought about it much. My daughter and I were recently discussing a troubled friend of hers, and I mentioned talking to the friend's mother about it. My daughter said, "Oh no mom. She wouldn't get it. She's not a good mom like you." I was stunned.
                        Then I started thinking about it, and by golly I AM a good mother. I'm pretty sure that my daughter knows she can (and does) talk to me about anything at all without a hysterical response, or judgement. I treat her with respect and get the same back.

                        SOOO... hell-it's starting to look like all in all I'm not that bad bad person I always told myself I was. Not by a long shot. And that is priceless.

                        Peace and love
                        That is beautiful and I am SO very happy for you to have found peace and self love through this process. For me, even the drinking chapter was an integral part of my life story and it's wonderful to come full circle; home to oneself. :h


                        All the best, P.
                        "People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone."
                        
? Audrey Hepburn, Actress and Philanthropist :heart:

                        Comment

                          #13
                          It's a new life!

                          Ann, great post, thank you for putting your thoughts down for us! Sometimes someone puts it down so well that it almost takes my breath away, this is one of those posts. I'm so grateful to have all these brilliant colleagues in sobriety! I'm amazed at the process of fading back into one's self. The outline was there, but empty. AF time slowly fills in that outline and we reappear. Relief and a feeling of peace are just some of the rewards on this path. Thanks again for your post!
                          "When you have faults, do not fear to abandon them." Analects of Confucius
                          AF 11/12/11

                          Comment

                            #14
                            It's a new life!

                            Wow...couldn't have come at a better time! Thanks all for sharing I'm at a point were things seem a bit dark? Since the physical challenge and goals of quitting have passed. I'm realizing thought that its just the end I part 1 and the start to part 2 which is really exciting and gives me something to look forward too. So much has changed for the better in six months and I can't wait to see how much further ill be in a years time.

                            Thanks for this! And I'm really excited for you! Hugs all around

                            Comment

                              #15
                              It's a new life!

                              Additional thoughts

                              Another thing-it was always in my head that I was not as good as my own siblings.
                              Sisters especially. But that is not reality either. I was the one with the drinking issue but of course they have their share of issues!

                              As a matter of fact their issues are worse. I have changed. They have not. Their issues are involved in personal choices,willingness to take abuse, excessive behaviors that are harmful etc etc.

                              Yet again I'm not the worst person in the world.

                              Comment

                              Previous template Next
                              Working...
                              X