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    #1

    When did you come clean?

    I'm a mere infant in the alcohol free zone. I find myself in the middle of conversations with people who just took their 45 year old son to detox and 30 day treatment center. Others talk about prescription drug addictions and how they overcame them and other conversations all surrounding addiction. In all the recent conversations I have observed, commented and listened but not once have I said anything about my own struggles. I guess I am afraid that if I tell someone then I'm accountable. Or maybe it's that I have so much shame around it. Not the actual drinking and making a fool out of myself because I always (99%) of the time drank at home OR with people who drank just as much or more than I did. So I don't have the horror of having to ask forgiveness for making an ass of myself...but all the same, why am I keeping my struggle with alcohol a secret? It concerns me on some levels.

    Curious...who came clean and when? Did you wait until you had some time under your belt? Maybe never say anything at all and just waited for those around you notice?
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    #2
    When did you come clean?

    I told my children i was going to slow down drinking and they said great. Last weekend i told my children i was an alcoholic but i loved them and i wanted to be there for them. They told me they loved me and were very proud of me. At this stage i am only telling my children as they are my world and I know they have been very worried about me. I am on Day 20 and they cannot believe it, neither can i, soon i will tell other close family members but not just yet, i have the support and love of my children and that is all that matters.
    AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

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      #3
      When did you come clean?

      I hardly ever reply to threads outside of the Congratularory ones (if you stick around you'll know what I'm talking about!)

      Coming clean... well, I signed myself into rehab and told my close family and close friends. It was a bit difficult doing the 28 days... and to be honest I'm not sure if I needed to be in that specific place... but I did it, got the t-shirt and I am glad about that.

      I don't think there is anything to fear about coming clean. Nobody looked at me like I had two heads and some actually thought I was brave for facing it head on...

      I don't think "addiction" is a nasty word. It's just a fact of life. I don't think we should HIDE! Stand up and be proud for being pro-active I reckon.

      Comment

        #4
        When did you come clean?

        Unraveling our journeys is such slow process, I believe. And of course trust and comfort are paramount. For me it's also being able to articulate what the hell is going on...

        I had my 2 best friends supporting the beginning othe journey about 2 years ago...geez, it feel like 2 days!!
        My friends are gone now...so my process is now marveling here.
        :l
        On My Own Way Out Since May 20, 2012
        *If you think poorly of yourself, you can fail with a clear conscience.
        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f11/tool-box-27556.html tool box
        https://www.mywayout.org/community/f19/newbies-nest-30074.html newbie nest

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          #5
          When did you come clean?

          Available, Zen & Kradle - thanks for taking the time to respond. I guess what I'm hearing is that when the time is right, I will find the words. My daughter is 7 (almost 8) I don't know that she'd understand and might be too young to get it. Maybe not, but I guess I have all the time in the world.

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            #6
            When did you come clean?

            Its not easy saying them Sake but once said I felt like a weight had been lifted from me. My children are aged from 20 upwards to 26 so they certainly knew that i drank and they certainly seen me embarrass myself and them too many times. I think 7yr olds think its funny when we are drunk (mine did) but they still know something. I am lucky I am still extremely close to my children and for every sober day I have they love it and so do i just quietly lol.
            AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

            Comment

              #7
              When did you come clean?

              hi sake,

              I suppose I am coming clean right now. i am at a crossroads! It has been recommended by an addictions specialist that i go into a 28 day recovery rehab. I have to go or lose my job? I will also be made to be medically monitored for the next 2 yrs at a cost to myself. YUP this is a real wakeup call!. I am just fine tuning the dates, I will then have to tell my kids 19 and 21 that I will not be home for a month!. This will be the hardest but perhaps the most warranted discussion yet. I am looking at this as a change for the better and to finally be accountable for my drunken decisions. In a way I am looking forward to getting off this roller coaster and digging deep for some clarity and peace of mind. Its all good....
              You've been CRITICISING yourself for years and it hasn't worked. Try APPROVING of yourself and see what happens......

              Comment

                #8
                When did you come clean?

                Available...sounds like you have an awesome family. What a blessing!!

                Comment

                  #9
                  When did you come clean?

                  Columbia..it sounds like you have a rough but promising road ahead of you! I wish you all the best, only good things can come from getting sober!

                  Comment

                    #10
                    When did you come clean?

                    Yes Sake and thank god for that, they actually say I was and am a good mother. Maybe they are the drunk ones and I am the sober one ha ha.

                    Columbia best of luck. Was it work that said you had to go or your choice? Your children will be proud of you for taking such a step i am sure. Let us know how it goes and keep on here.
                    AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

                    Comment

                      #11
                      When did you come clean?

                      Available...I am sure you're an awesome mom. Something I've come to realize is that most people are that have good hearts are still good when they drink, we just have to get rid of the booze and then the really awesome stuff comes shinning through!

                      Comment

                        #12
                        When did you come clean?

                        Sake123;1558587 wrote: My daughter is 7 (almost 8) I don't know that she'd understand and might be too young to get it. Maybe not, but I guess I have all the time in the world.
                        You know my boys are 7 and 9(basically) and I told them without hesitation. They knew I was drinking beer obviously..but they are very well adjusted little guys. Did I Need to tell them?..No. They were like "really dad..you stopped drinking ? " and happy about it too. I could have also not have told them and just shown them by action instead of words..All things considered I chose to tell them for my own reasons. Mox Nix for me. I think it boils down to like you said up there .. its when you feel the time is right for yourself.

                        My family knows, my friends know, my client "boss" knows. my landlord knows .. everyone knows. I have no problem telling people..Its just my nature...my personality.. I know what your saying though..
                        Progress lies not in enhancing what is, but in advancing toward what will be. - Khalil Gabran
                        AF: 9-10-2013

                        Comment

                          #13
                          When did you come clean?

                          Columbia... It will be fine. ) Bring treats (candy etc.) with you and lots of comfy clothes. iPod if they allow that, books and a DVD player. (The comfy clothes are a must.) They'll take your smartphone away so be ready for that...

                          There really isn't anything bad to come out of focusing on yourself for 28 days. My rehab was a kinda crappy one but it still helped so I think you will find it beneficial...

                          Comment

                            #14
                            When did you come clean?

                            Nice looking kids Gambler!

                            Yeah... there is really no shame in acknowledging it. There is more shame in being in denial (read as being dumb!) than facing it...

                            Comment

                              #15
                              When did you come clean?

                              hi available

                              well work has imposed this agreement. i don't really need this job...but it has bitten me in the butt to do something about it . Inpatient will all be paid for therefore I decided to take advantage of the opportunity. Nuff said
                              You've been CRITICISING yourself for years and it hasn't worked. Try APPROVING of yourself and see what happens......

                              Comment

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