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    Hoping

    I am STILL waiting to start this program in it's entirety.
    I have my appointment with psychiatrist this upcoming Friday. My supplements have arrived and I've been taking them. But tonight, I went to the local liquor discount store and bought my favorite adult beverage:
    Little Penquin Chardonnay from Australia. I've had ALOT of it and am sitting here hoping that the Topamax is the link that will do it for me. Otherwise, I'll have to sign into rehab because I can't go back to teaching in Sept in this condition. I feel like the biggest slut about alcohol. Why can't I stop? Please tell me that the topamax will make the difference. Em

    #2
    Hoping

    Em,
    First of all - be gentle with yourself. You have a biochemical, neurochemical problem AND you are now working towards fixing it. Good for you!!! We have ALL been there - and we have been noticing on the abs board that we are a bunch of strong, competant, intelligent (mostly) women! You are too - look - you found where to go for help and are getting what you need in order.
    So, you had a slip - ok -- what did you learn from it??? Think about it, I'll bet there is something in there you can learn.
    I'm on Campral instead of Topa, but it sure has worked wonders for me with the supps and cd's. From what I hear the Topa is great too, so yes, it should really help you.
    Hang in there, keep on working the system and be really, really good to you - you deserve it because you are doing this great thing for yourself and just because you are you!!!
    Peggy

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      #3
      Hoping

      Thanks Peggy - I really needed that reminder not to beat up on myself. I learned, once again, that it isn't much fun to wake up the next morning and feel physically like crap and that my goal is to get to the point where I can enjoy sipping wine instead of chugging it. Em

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        #4
        Hoping

        Em, I never thought I would ever see myself having one or two glasses of wine and being able stop at that. Before starting MWO, I would start drinking while preparing dinner (5:00 or 6 oPM) every evening and drank till going to bed (10:30 or 11:30PM). And like you, I woke up feeling just awful most mornings. The topa has helped tremendously, but it's not a magic pill. It still takes a little discipline on my part. It takes discipline to put this program into motion and to the extent that you will get the most out of it. I think it can be said that you get out of it what you put into it. But I'm here to tell you, it's worth it. I have been in the program since May 8th, and I haven't had more that 2 glasses of wine on any given evening, and I'll add to that, no more than 2 evenings in any week. That's an accomplishment I am proud of that I owe to MWO. Hope you get your topamax soon and get going with us, I'm certain you won't be sorry. We'll be here to cheer you on!!! Eliziby

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