30 days???

[Guest]

30 days???

I am SO glad you are HOME! I MISSED YOU DEEEPPPPPLLLLLYYYY!!!!

[toughintexas]

30 days???

Niblet, glad you are back, glad you had a great time, too bad LUV isn't close enough to have gone with you! Try to catch up, "see" you tomorrow!

[bootcampbarbie]

30 days???

i need to start my hormones? god anymore time without energy and i'm going to have a meltdown. lol anyway, hello alll. how is everyone? i forgot nibs was going on a girls trip. so hope you had fun. ah tex i've got to caught up on the new shows. i've just been having hubby time as now he is gone for hte week. and that is when i get all sad sad girly. but the first day is the hardest. i know i'm some kind of weirdo. hahahaah but last nite i start crying as my heart hurts as he is leaving. then this morning i can't get out of bed hardly as i'm going to miss him. and by mid day i'm able to function. phew. so blood panels will be done this week and then they put me on hormone replacements. thank you jesus. i feel like a fricking nut case. lol so i can't even believe all these people are in and out of your house luv. i'd go crazy. oh and by the way everyone. that treatment center in vermont where you go and supposedly well you don't desire drinking anymore? well i booked myself an opening. so i'm there the first week of january. wish me luck. i've just booked hotel, airfare and took their last opening which was a cancellation. who knows, someone posted about it. and i'm ready. my hubby interviewed them, it's 3200. and he figures i sure spend that annually on wine. so he said girl, let's give it a go. and hell, he's going snow boarding while i work with their doctor. hummm never been to vermont. kind of like being on topamax though. like being skinny barbie. hahahaa. okay, more 2 hi. ummm new guy posting. welcome hummmm morrison. i'll start pm ing you again with prayers. i know you hate that. lol and magic and bird how are you. hope you enjoyed camping birdie. anyone i'm missing? bear hope you are having fun. nite

[magic]

30 days???

Oh, LUV.
You are magical but you're not superwoman.
You need a rest. Physically and emotionally or you're going to burn out if you're not already.
You just can't do it all, sweets. It's impossible. You need to say "no".

And yes, eventually , if you choose, alcohol will become someone elses problem instead of yours.
I have my higher power who guides me daily, medication to help me sleep, antidepressants and a good shrink. I'm working on my other demons as well.

I am far from figuring it all out, I probably never will, but I can cope with life now...with whatever it hands me and I truly never think about having a drink.

But...my house is a mess, my bed full of leaves, the living room full of antique china and OMG you should see the bathroom. I'm expecting another litter in 2 weeks......Sam is building a robot.

The kids are clean, there is fresh food in the fridge, the bills are paid and there is gas in the van. I think the dishwasher is clean tonight too. I'm sober. I do not drink.

Stop for a minute and figure out what is really important right now. To you, your kids and to Mama. Everyone else takes the backseat.

Read TIT'S post again, she is very wise. Mama's husband needs to step up to the plate and at least hire a house keeper. One who cooks and cleans. Brit gets her bed back.

All this work and responsibility is not fair to you. Mama will not think that you love her any less if you delegate. I promise.

Ask for some help, LUV, please. :hug:

Bootise girl, when they draw your blood, get them to check your thyroid too. I don't think your fatigue, depression and weepiness are all hormonal, I wonder if your thyroid is acting up.

I'm down to 100mg. of topamax at bedtime and am feeling so much more alert and smarter LOL! I see Dr. Shrink tomorrow, forgot my last appointment, that's bad........

I'm expanding the business too so I have my work cut out for me and whatever kid I can grab.

Good night, good morning to everyone, lurkers too ( I hope you post),

Blessings to all who are broken tonight,

m. xxx

[Guest]

30 days???

Thank-you all for letting me lean on you !!!!! I love you

[bootcampbarbie]

30 days???

ah yes you are right about that to magic. the dr had taken one look at me and said your thyroid is off. i said it's been off since childhood. lmao no one will listen to me. he said well here are all of your symptoms. i said yep now compound that by 10000. so yep thyroid being tested lets see paper says hypothyroid fati8gue anemia dysmenoria and menapausal and then 55000 other things. lol there is even a panel for dipstick. but i got rid of mr. 5 minutes quite sometime ago. i should tell them they don't have to test for him.
luv bug. we mean it. housekeeper and a cook and help for mama. enough already. i checked and your real name is not mother theresa.

[magic]

30 days???

Boots.....just woke up and you are already making me laugh. Go forth and fix your thyroid!
You'll feel so much better!!!!!!!
Luv we love you too!

m. xx

[magic]

30 days???

Luv, I was just thinking back to when I was caring for my mother and how incredibly anxious I felt all the time, I was just "waiting", deep down, and wondering how I was going to handle it, I guess. I was drinking then and I drank in a miserable attempt to control my anxiety. It didn't work.

I could not imagine a life with out my mom. She died 5 years ago next month and I miss her every day but I have grown so much since then and life is good.

I think that your doctor would be happy to see you and help. That's what they do.

m. xx :l

p.s. If Boots is sending her pack, I'll send Sable and Bob but the heat will bother them so you'll have to give both of them one of those "poodle cuts". Hmm, a collie with a poodle cut.

[toughintexas]

30 days???

Aw shucks Magic...thanks...ya'll know me, I just call it like I see it, feel it! Boots, no kidding, we test everyone for each hormone, and thyroid, and adrenal fatigue, usually they go hand in hand for those under stress....Gosh, do you think any of US qualify....lol....I'm due for my hormone check-up too....noticed I've been restless at night lately, and that usually starts off the "out of whack" syndrome.... Ok, Nibs, get back here....Morrison, come out come out, however you are!!!! More2, whats up girlfriend, are we going with Boots to Vermont....lol....? I miss Papa Bear...when's he coming back anyway? I hope before I go to Baltimore on the 20th for my check-up, I'll be calling all prayers....last time I did good, til something was "off" and then I bellied up the bar, and hurt myself...lol...that's the last time I pulled one that severe, it was May, so I'm much improved! Haven't graduated, but I'm passing my progress reports most of the time....getting more smiley faces than Red X's, so just gotta keep on, keeping on! Starting to see some results from the work-outs, that inspiration....feel better, wanna keep feeling better....motivation girls, gotta have it! Love you all....

[bootcampbarbie]

30 days???

well ready for my tests tomorrow, gosh i now notice that although i'm still skinny i have a pouchy on the belly. can't wait to have the umpphy to get back to the gym. i hit it thursday. with no energy hard to do the gym routine with any rigor. hell, even hiking the girlies today was a struggle but bootsie did it. and can i just say they didn't find the deer but they rolled in everything that smelled like deer. so i pretended like i couldn't see them on the entire hike. because they rolled in it and acted like they couldn't be seen. laughing really hard. they were camo dogs hunting. we hiked for 2 hours and you could see all the way from malibu to catalina and on down to palos verdes. nice nice. but of course i couldn't find the dogs. well until they were so tuckered they could only put their paws up and i had to haul their asses into the rented suv. were ever is my barbie mercedes? they've had it now 2 1/2 weeks. i think they are driving it and have decided to keep it. okay tomorrow i'm going to go in and demand my car back. but truth be known i like the little kia suv and couldn't care less about getting the 60K barbie car back. this suv is fun. so tex i think all these hormone things are awack starting about 35 as they say. read two books on it last nite. can't wait to get thyroid and hormones a humming. magic i will have book done in a week once that is done and tex i know i will stop being so fricking weird. well between hormones, thyroid, pnemonia, being sued. fricking weird ass clients. yep one hellofa two months. no wonder i drank again. and i was doing so well. at least i'm going to vermont where all good people go to get cured for once and for all. hubby is doing that and he also is taking me to another place i guess as a back up plan. this place sounds devine. they promise as in money back guarantee. he is on a mission. now you have to get i'm not like a crazy drunk. but he is so committed. so he booked us a precaution for feb/march for 2 weeks as a fun time for surfing and detoxing i think is one week there for fun time gentle at this place. friends of his. nice nice.

[morrison]

30 days???

I want to, no, I want to and NEED to come back. Sorry for being flaky. Again. I told you all I was a selfish prick. I was on a horrible binge again. Wow. I think I'll just go crazy and end it all, but the irony is, when I feel like I really am going to die, it is pretty scary. Just had some chest pain and pain shooting down my arm. I know that can't be good. I'm a freakin' mess. Don't know what to do. I already had 6 drinks today, because I can't stop cold, or I'll freak out. I had to get up at 4:30 to make work by 5:30. Stopped and grabbed a 6 pack of Mike's Hard Lemonade. I pounded 4 of them in the parking lot in about 5 minutes to take the edge off. I just snuck out to hit the other 2. This is pathetic. I'm such a waste. I need to sober up again. I just have so much self disgust, I don't even want to face reality. I look like shit. My face looks pummeled from all this partying. When I drove into work this morning, I was still smashed from last night. Well, more like smashed from the last couple weeks. I get into the parking lot, its still dark, and I realize that my right headlight it out. Holy shit. That is what got me busted recently for a DUI, except it was the left headlight. I'm so lucky I didn't get nabbed. Christ. Anyway, this is the shit I guess needs to happen to scare me, but I'm still scared. My luck is going to run out soon if I don't stop. I'm scared, because I just never learn my lesson. What the hell is wrong with me? I guess I may truly be insane.

[magic]

30 days???

Morrison, Go to the hospital.

Chest pain shooting down your arm etc. You know that.

Get someone to take you, you don't want to die.

Now go and get someone. Go. They don't care how much you've been drinking.

They will help you, that's what they are there for.

magic xxx :l

[Accountable for Me]

30 days???

Morrison, you are NOT insane. I remember the days where I would be on a binge and brought some booze to drink in the parking lot before work!!! I remember them all to well. It wasn't like I wasn't intoxicated enough from the previous days of drinking hard. Then I would sneak out to my car and have a couple more every few hours to take the edge off of not dying. I agree with you tho and that is not to go cold turkey unless you have a doctor to help you off. DANGEROUS!!!! Your chest pains are a good indicator your body is shutting down, so high time you try your best to get a grip on this. I know what you are going through!!! Believe me your pain is what I had felt in my past. You and me - we could be twins!

There is nothing wrong with you other than you can't do this alone. You need to get into some sort of out patient treatment program or seek a physician to help you with a program that will work for you. Please take my advise. I was where you are and I am in my 9th month of being rid of this shit. It can be done. I am rooting for you big time!!!

XOXO AFM

[Accountable for Me]

30 days???

And yes, get to a hospital you are playing with fire if you do feel you are on the verge of a heart attack or stroke.

[toughintexas]

30 days???

Hey good buddy! You are not insane, the alcohol is! You really, really need to get to a hospital, they will take you in at the ER, and they will keep you and detox you with meds...just be honest with them about what is going on....BETTER TO BE IN THE HOSPITAL THAN JAIL DUDE!.... We love you no matter what, its why we are ALL HERE! Please take care of you, please! We need you too much!