30 days???

[brittzak]

30 days???

I am just reading this before work this AM, I am devastated as I KNOW you all are here. he has been our constant companion for over a year now. I just can not believe this.....I will post more tonight when I can gather my thoughts.

[Niblet]

30 days???

I'm almost out the door for work and will walk with such a heavy heart today... I will be back later on... I don't know if I've said it enough, But I love each and every one you so much.

[toughintexas]

30 days???

Nibs, you know I e-mailed you yesterday, because I had a feeling you didn't know, and didn't want you to just log on and read it.....I told you then, and I'm telling EVERYONE here, how much I love you all, how much you all mean to me, how much I appreciate everyone's posts, support, input.....I really consider this a big part of my "family", and this "family", has helped me keep my real one, in such better harmony since I found this place over a year ago...I'm such a better person, and so much more healed, happy and together since getting here....because of everyone on this site. Papa Bear was like a mentor, friend, and fellow Texan, and a soft place to fall, and Papa words of wisdom...I'll forever miss him...BUT, I vow here and now, to follow his advice about living each day as it could be your last...and I am looking towards the heavens, and promise Bear, riding his Harley in the clouds, looking down upon each of us, that I'll never have another drunk day ever....I'm doing it for me, I'm doing it to make Papa proud, and I'm doing it so a day in my life is never wasted again, being stolen by the beast...life is too short! I've mod'ed very well, talked to Bear when I thought I might overindulge, and he stopped me with his kind words everytime I asked, with complete understanding...So, I know I'll hear him on my shoulder, whispering, anytime I think I feel a weak moment, and I'll be ok. TODAY IS ONE WEEK AGO THIS HAPPENED TO HIM, SO I WILL REMEMBER ALL HIS WISDOM, AND HONOR HIM BY NOT EVEN THINKING ABOUT THE BEAST TODAY! AS HE SAID, SURRENDER, YOU CAN'T CONTROL THE UNCONTROLLABLE. I love you Bear....please be our Guardian Angel, motoring all about, striking us with lightening if we faulter, we'll know its you.....

[brittzak]

30 days???

I am just so overcome with grief. I STILL have the message he left me on my cell phone when Mama died. He has been a rock for us all through some real rough times and been our Papa Bear!!! He left us WHOLE, like others have said. He was happy, he was loving life.... Mama Bear, PLEASE KNOW we love you and your children. When you are ready, come visit us. We will be here for you like Papa Bear was for us. You all have been part of our family for a long time now. Your pain is our pain.
The war against this horrid disease....our Papa Bear WON!!!!! I love each of you!!!!! We will win this fight too. Every time I think of taking a drink, I will remember his voice telling me to pour it out and get my ASS to an AA meeting. He never sugar coated it for us, told us like it was. He was a true father to us all.
Fly with the angels Papa Bear, ride raindrops with Billy and Mama.

Hugs and love to you all here!!!! I LUVUALL very much!

[morrison]

30 days???

Hello everybody. I am very angry about this as well. I want to also say how much I love and appreciate everybody I've met on here that put up with all my shit. Bear was just the best. I am so sad about this. Sad and angry. I want to understand why shit like this happens, but I can't. I know Bear wouldn't want us to be sad and upset, but it is hard. I really don't know what to say at all. I just want to say I love all of you.

[Niblet]

30 days???

I'm simply lost for words. You all are such a part of my life that it pains me so much to feel the loss of our Bear. Dx suggested planting a tree in his memory and I will be doing just that... The Lord is a very wise man to know that this is transplanting season in Northern Ontario... I'm just lost for words guys please excuse me... I just want to send so much love to you all.. ... Heaven is a much better place having Bear there.
"May warm breezes and smells of blossoming trees be with you on your rides always my friend"

[Niblet]

30 days???

As I leave for our long weekend trip with our boys I will forever feel changed. Take Good Care One and all... I love you all, Hugs, xxx

[Determinatrix]

30 days???

Many Subscribers are planting a tree in his honor which I thought was a nice idea.
I know that many of you don't subscribe and I thought I would share.

RIP Bear

Dx

[brittzak]

30 days???

That is a wonderful idea!!! There is no answer why things happen the way they do. What we must take from this is to appreciate life. It can be over so quickly. In a flash! I love you all so much.

[brittzak]

30 days???

We have our own special MWO angel!

[Determinatrix]

30 days???

Bear would forgive her. He would probably drive her to AA.
I wish I was able to learn that from him.
I am not able to find that type of kindness in my heart.

Thinking of you all with love,
Dx

[Cinders]

30 days???

I have two trellises behind my deck. The vines planted there died last year in a freeze.

I am going to plant to climbing roses there for bear.

Love you all, too.

Cindi

[brittzak]

30 days???

Cindi, XXXXXXX to you my friend!

[toughintexas]

30 days???

I'll plant a tree too, and participate in whatever any of you, or RJ wants to do. Morrison, glad you are back, missed you tons, esp. now....You and D will have be the testosterone now for us girls... I'm so paranoid now, and I know that's goofy...More2 was driving home today, about 5 hrs. and I fretted, had to just go escape most of the day, I was so relieved when she was home...nutso I know... Like More2's new sig., we have to do this, win this battle, for our Papa Bear....and Morrison, trust me, I'm pissed too, and sad...its part of it I guess....Love you all sooooo soooooo very much! Boots, glad to see you here too, missed you too. I'll see you all tomorrow, promise!

[brittzak]

30 days???

Good morning all. We lost our lovely friend and our hearts are aching, but like TIT said earlier, we need to honor his fight and his support of us and his memory by continuing to be sober. The absolute last thing bear would want it is for us to relapse. I KNOW how very easy that is to do, but lets call each other, lean, lean, lean if we need it. We are all in pain, pissed, hurting... ALL of us. I wakeup this morning with the heaviest heart KNOWING that his family is hurting 100 times worse. Bear had a myspace and all the kids are on it. He and I spoke via that when I was gone from here. It is under MONTE.....you can send the kids messages if you like, I did. I have called Mama bear as well but she has not called back, but knowing the phone rings non-stop, she may have needed to turn it off or may be with one of the children right now. I hope she is and she knows how much we are all thinking of her. TIT, if you can get a fund set-up, I am SO IN! Let me know if I can do anything to help you. That is a wonderful idea and a way to honor his fight to sobriety forever. I love you all!