30 days???

[brittzak]

30 days???

Cowgal, I tell you Iwas RIGHT WHERE you are now!!! I really thought if I didn't do something, I was going to die. It was Lenair or rehab and rehab to ME is like paying 13,000.00 to go to prison...JUST MY OPINION...I would have gone if Lenair didn't work though. WHY? Because even prison was better than what I was doing to myself. I'd binge for a day or 2 and then take a day or 2 or 3 to recover from the binge. I was merely exisisting. Sober life is SO MUCH BETTER. I go to AA too Cowgal, but I can say one thing....I am NOT powerless over this. I can make a difference in my life and I vow to from June 19th foward...first day AF! I have changed my diet to improve my health, started the tinctures, and exercising. I am just learning to live again. Last year when I had 8 months, I would have a glass of wine here and there.....eventually I fell off...this time I have accepted that drinking is no longer an option for me. I can not have even one. I am not using motuhwash with AL, cooking with it, I don't even take cold meds with AL in it. Focusing on my health has replaced the focus on AL. If you ever need to talk...please call me!!!

[Niblet]

30 days???

Good Morning
Cowgal a big "Congratulations" on making this life changing decision !!! As for the financial aspect, there is no price on the freedom you will have for the rest of your life xxx Go forward my friend.... grab onto the rope that is hanging in front of you.

And, Best you absolutely "ROCK" !!! Good stuff enjoying the 4th sober .... Wow !!! 92 days AF today for you !!! Congratulations, you are a true inspiration to us all xxx

I'm happy to hear that your health issues are getting sorted out Cindi. I hated hearing that you were living in such pain before. Yahooooo !!!

Bird, I'm so happy that you and your girls were blessed by receiving that synthesizer. You deserve these happy things to happen for you. I'm thinking that maybe your home sounds a titch like mine... Haaa !!! Haaa !!!! Oh well, my fellas could be doing a whole lot worse things than making a racket !!

So, guys !!!! I'm so excited to share with you the wonderful news !!!! Tex emailed pictures from her gallery of " the world champion paint mare, Lola " They won world champion !!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know I sound byass, but I saw the reserve and there is simply NO comparison !!! When Lola is in the ring, she is ALL you can look at !!! Congratulations Tex, hubby, horse and trainer on a job amazingly done !!!!!!!!! xxx

Well, last night it poured rain and there was some thunder in a distance... I sure hope that we get a drying trend soon so that all the hay can be put up for the year.... I'm getting a little worried as we usually have all our hay in by now..... My fingers are crossed.
I hope that everybody is well and enjoying their Tuesday... Hugs, xxx

[Cinders]

30 days???

Hello my dear friends on this hot, hot, hot Tuesday in the south.

Nibs, I hope it dries out for you soon. However, be careful about what you pray for...
I hope your guys didn't get too worn out yesterday with the pipe and the rock. I love hearing about your life, mine is so different and yours sounds so idyllic. However, like Bessie's on the ODAT thread, idyllic doesn't mean easy. I imagine you work your hiney off.

More2 and Tex, good on you BOTH for the Antabuse. It is a difficult decision, because it really does take drinking off the plate. I mean really. However, it is a good decision because it really does take drinking off the plate. Dichotomy. Sigh. More2, I also talk to Bear. He is there. He cares. Now my eyes are tearing up. He was such a calming, inspiration, and more than that, KIND, presence here. I miss him so much.

Mary Anne (CowGal)- Hang in there. I am like you. I hate being abstinent on the antabuse because sometimes I want to tear my hair out. Literally. I grit my teeth and smile at hubby who is so clueless because he doesn't drink. I try so hard to look "normal" and inside I am screaming. You can get to your appt, and I will get to mine. Trust me, Mary Anne, if I go there and think it is whooey, I will let you know asap. It is better to lose $1200 than $3200. However, between Buckle, Luv, Lorisunshine, Best and Greenie, I am feeling pretty good about this. Pretty darn good. If Lenair doesn't work, though, I am not giving up. I will keep on keepin' on, because that is what Bear told me to do. He told me to never, ever give up giving up. I trust him. He knew. (Okay, tears again.)

LUV and Best, it is awesome you were around drinking and didn't even consider it an option. I hate beer but given nothing else.... I am so grateful both of you are doing so well. I know how hard it is to fight this thing every day.

Bird, what an incredible story about the keyboard. God is granting you some time to keep that stimulus check and use it when you really need it. If you get the house, you will need it, trust me!! Moving ALWAYS costs money. I, too, am hoping you get the house. It will be a much safer environment for you and your girls. My son and his wife and children live in a trailer on my property -- mine actually, we lived in it while we were building our house -- and every time tornados are in the area, I make them come up to the house to stay. Not saying the house would survive a full hit by a big one, I've seen the devastation of an F4, but it would do much better than a trailer. We live in the south and we have real weather. One of the things that makes us so tough.

Oky, for some reason I am thinking you are at Lenair this week? Am I wrong? I am hoping I am right and you are being healed even as I type. :l

Bootsie, get well, girl. Get well.

Everyone else, I am sorry if I forgot you but I am in the middle of some busy work and must get back to it.

btw, the new med is helping greatly and I am no longer in excruciating pain. However, the weird sensations are still there and I am wondering if I should pursue the cause, not just a bandaid. Kind of afraid to. Maybe Rhonda Lenair can help? Who knows?

Love to all my 30 Days friends.

BearFamily, I am thinking of you, too.

Love,
Cindi

[cowgal]

30 days???

ok

I am better today, just had a humdinger of a weekend, did lots of drinking and other stuff...........my body is still aching, but my mind is more positive, I feel a little more hopeful..........:h

Thanks for being here for me................:thanks:

Cindi, hope it works for you and me....................LUV, Best, Barbie, anyone else who it (Lenair) worked for, I hope it keeps on working...............I have been able to stop drinking for months in the past, but been miserable, as you all know EVERYONE I am around drinks like fish and totally rub it in when I am not drinking (how much fun they are having..............or maybe it is just what I "choose" to see???)

Bird, I am so excited for you and the house, the girls are too I bet!

Tex, I am so proud to know you, WORLD CHAMPION!!!!! WOW, beautiful horse btw.............thanks for sharing the pic, still have your #, just didn't really feel up to talking, not to positive if you know what I mean...............

Nibs, I'll help w/ the hay too.................I am sure it is a bit cooler up there than it is here, gladly I will be outside working w/ you.......................

I am not going to drink today, going to my favorite AA meeting, and LUV, I feel I am not powerless over this either..............just once I start drinking is when I lose the power..............eventually and not always, oh it is so rough what I do to this body (and mind) sometimes!!!!

Today is a new day, I hope you all are doing well, I don't mean to miss anyone, but have just 2 min. to jot this down and I am REALLY bad w/ all the names.....................

love you guys all ALOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!:l:h:l

MA

[bootcampbarbie]

30 days???

hello hello. hey more2 i'm calling you back tomorrow. i'm on the rebound. ah geez i have to say this has really got to stop.lmao i'm just so over it. and you know all that drinking all those years certainly tapped out the body. well borrowed time it was borrowed fucking time. tomorrow i play with tinctures. i am done with one bunch of mega antibiotics and now i'm going to start round 2. .whoop whoop. so, dr. says thursday i can jump on bike for like an hour. whoop whoop. okay okay it is a start. yes exercise. hubby says i'm flab city. oh god least of my worries honestly. i live for the day to get back to the gym and be my old bootcamp self.
so let's see to add in here on your happy posts. well, ma im so proud of you. gosh have been praying for you for a long time as i've seen myself in your when i was drinking. i can tell you this as lenair was a blessing to me and my last stop as i didn't actually think rehab would do it for me. going on month 7 now. and i was thinking as a friend had sent me a case of special special wine. and i was unloading it and putting it away in the cupboards. i gave away 3 bottles. but for say oh 2 months i've had the rest here in the house. and i have not thought to open them up cept one time and that was a passing thought. now funny too, when the drs. gave me all these pain meds these last two weeks and i do mean a ton.. like to do believe i took about and i counted 18 vicodin. i woke up one day and i said oh god i just cant do this i have to get off this. the old me would be like hey this is cool. but the new me just has to be sober. and my friends were cracking up cuz i said hey can't smoke up, can't drink cant drug it. i'm just clean barbie. and everyone is way happy about that i think. cuz i just noticed even on the pain meds that i was different. and i asked a few friends of mine i said you know do you like me better normal? and they all said yes. you are much more fun and lively. so see everyone notices.... no matter what you are using. so i just don't know how to explain the change since lenair cept to say that my system is just plain ol convinced and happy to be sober in all ways. it doesn't even like cold medicine. no way baby. i can barely tolerate tylenol pm and only cuz i have to use that instead of vicodin.
so nibs you are having way too much of a good time. and i didn't see bird but did you get the place? and best sounds like you had a great great time for the 4th... i want to see those photos too tex of the horsey..... and lisa i'm so happy you are getting into the health of it. cindy can't wait til you get to go. did you say you were taking your daughter? and i pray for good health for all. and more 2 did you sell your home? okay off to bed. i just finished writing up my class outline... whoop whoop. still havent figured out how to put my other class on utube. i'm going to ask hubby.

[bird]

30 days???

Hi all,
Yesterday we went to the free movies and saw Surfs Up. It was so good and had me in tears. Might just have to buy that one. Was feeling like drinking yesterday and got mad cuz I was on anty and couldnt. Wanted to rearrange the living room but didnt want the mess and just really PMSing. Finally ended up going shopping out of town and driving all these country back roads trying to find a shorter way to get there. Got a bit of school clothes for the kids and me a couple shirts. Then we wanted to eat at this buffet everybody is always talking about. So we walk in the door and it smelled awful. My kid says eww it stinks and so did I so we walked out and all these people are going in and I;m laughing my ass off and snorting. Ended up going to Subway.....do you all notice theres no guys on the thread lately. Since we lost Bear and Morrison and Det dont stop in much. So happy for Morrison. He must really have some time in by now. I've heard about the 3 month mark your head really starts to clear up. How about it Best??? You are at that mark....well I hear the kids getting up. More2 I think that anty hangs around in your system longer than they say. Those last few times I drank I really felt poisened and probably was. Cindi glad you are doing better. Arent you going to Lenair also or have you already been.?Nibs, love hearing about what is going on around your place. Luv,CG,Bootsie,Tex,Oky and everyone I missed. have a good day...love bird

[cowgal]

30 days???

hey all

Hi guys, better today, still not 100%, but with time that will come.................think this weekend at least taught me a lesson, gotta look at it that way................Can't drink!!!!!

Nibs, Bird, More2, Barbie, TIT and everyone else, just wanted to say hey and have a great day, been busy today, and will be for the remainder, but want to check in later and see you guys..................:h

Just got off the phone w/ Barry at lenair and the Houston thing may be off if more people don't' go.....................OMG, don't know what to think.................I just called to confirm my EXACT dates so I can plan the travel arrangements, and now I don't know what to do..........:upset:

Anybody else feel like doing it w/ me??? I know I have to................

Love you guys!!!!:l:h

MA

[cowgal]

30 days???

thanks!

More2, that was nice of you to do that, I wish I had come here all the time and gotten to know Bear, thanks for sharing some of his old posts..................

Appreciate it,:thanks:

love and hugs,:h:l

MA

[toughintexas]

30 days???

WOW, More2, I remember getting that one from Bear too! Now I'm tearing up, sure do miss him, but I talk to him alot too! I'm feeling great on the anabuse, funny how it just takes the drinking off the table and you just are forced to find something else to do, and it sure is lots more productive! Yesterday I went to the yoga class at UT Tyler that my daughter teaches, we had lunch, got pedi's, and then did a bit of shopping, came home, swam, cooked dinner, and then chatted til forever...lol...had to answer a million e-mails, and I couldn't sleep, I think I exercised too much, or swam too late in the day! Slept great tho, and feel awesome today. Being AF is awesome! I may just stay on this stuff for a month! Bird, glad you are having such a fun summer, when do you find out about the house? More2 is putting hers on the market today, and I hope she doesn't sell it until after I get home from vacation next month, sorry More2, but I wanna come eat at Etta's and Campagne, and go to the fish market, and on your hike with the bears....lol.... Cowgal, you can call me anytime you feel like talking, sorry we missed each other last week! Somebody go with Cowgal to Lenair now! Boots, I want you well too, and punch your hubby in the nose, I happen to know you don't have any flab! Nibs, thanks tons for making the announcement on Lola, she is an incredible mare, we had a great 4th, and I didn't overindulge either, had a few, but very controlled, plus, More2, my common sense monitor, called to remind me not to celebrate toooo much...she tried to watch it on the video, but missed it, but called me, I got her call right after the ribbon was put around Lola's neck, so getting to tell her first, was special! Cindi, I'm so happy you are hanging in, and have so much AF time, I know you and your daughter will be perfectly fine after Rhonda's. Who am I missing? Please forgive me if I missed someone! I'm still trying to catch up from being gone! I love you all, each and every single one of you, tons!!!!! Will check in later!
Bird is right, we need more testosterone on here, talked to D last night tho, its always great to catch so many in chat! Ya'll log on later!

[okydoky]

30 days???

Hello Friends!!!!

Guess where I am sitting???? In the Castleton Library
I wandered in here to look at a world atlas and saw the computer, so here I am!
Amazing is all I can say. I don't even know where to start. I had my 1st appointment yesterday and I am still in awe. After driving from RI, I arrived at my appointment very tired (5hr drive). Spoke for a while with Barry and then Rhonda came in. She "disapeared" my desire, yes, but so much more, I'm still trying to soak it all in.
So after my appointment, I drove to Applewood (exhausted) Up since 4am (1am PC time).
Oh...I stopped at the little deli in Castleton for a turkey (which I will have to eliminate for a while...don't understand all the diet stuff but will give it the best) sandwhich. After lovely Nancy gave me a tour, I went to my room (Hanah's), ate my sandwhich, briefly looked over the information Barry gave me and fell asleep on a very comfortable bed.
When I awoke, I strolled into town, and there happend to be a concert on the green. The whole town was there. So I sat on a bench and talked to some locals and saw folks with wine, but I was just fine without it and realized it was my first sober concert since I can remember and I really enjoyed myself. I walked home with Ralph and Samson (I love that dog). This morning Ralph made a delicious breakfast of french toast, bacon, fresh fruit and of course maple syrup from their own trees. They have a darling foriegn exhange student from Belarus (between Poland and Russia) the reason I am here looking at an atlas.
Well, that's probably enough for now. I'll try to pop in again tomorrow after my 2nd appt.
Love,
Oky

[toughintexas]

30 days???

Oky! How incredible for you! I hear the happiness and calm in your voice! I bet Vermont is beautiful right now, its 102 here! Can't wait to hear more, I am still holding you near my heart and prayers, and I'm so happy this is working for you!!! Have a wonderful visit and trip!

[bestlifeldms]

30 days???

OHHHHHHHHHH, Oky! So happy to hear from you. Been wondering how you are doing! Awsome! Just wonderful! So happy for you! I have my follow-up call tomorrow. Barry called me today. Enjoy the rest of your stay!

Tons of hugs, :l:h:l Best

[Cinders]

30 days???

Oky,

God Bless you for posting today.

It is awesome that your desire is disappeared. Wow.

Love,
Cindi

[brittzak]

30 days???

OKY...YIPPPEEEEE...I KNOW just how you feel. I am so glad it is happening for you too. I am 20 days AF today and NO desire at all to drink. It is just off the table. Out of my mind. Enjoy your new freedom. COWGAL...go to Vermont it is actually cheaper for you to fly there than Texas...the fee is 400.00 more for Texas. If this is what you feel you need...schedule Vermont.
More2...about start to cry reading those posts. Breaks my dang heart. I know he is so proud of us all right now. We kinda fell off the wagon when he died, but ALL of us dusted of and got our hinny's back in gear. I am proud of us.

[okydoky]

30 days???

Well, I'm back because the library closes soon and it felt so good to be able to tell someone about this experience. I haven't called any of my friends because none of them would really understand and I just love you all for bringing me here in the 1st place.
When I scheduled this appt, I said "Barry, what will I do with myself for 4 days?" And he said "When is the last time you spent some time alone?" And I thought, I hate being alone with myself.
Well...not any more. I am in tears now just thinking about this day. Sitting at the breakfast table with strangers (I would have hated that in the past) and really enjoying the conversation. Getting in the car and exploring Rutland and discovering Crystal Beach (I'll be there tomorrow with my suit).
This little town is beautiful and the people here are wonderful and life is good. (Is this what you AAers call a pink cloud?) Last week I had friends in town and the 4th and we drank and I look back and it really wasn't fun...especially the day after! I always thought I needed that drink in hand to be fun and social but just last night, I had the most fun and social time with these lovely Vermont folks and will always remember.
We flew in to RI on Sunday and I had promised myself I wouldn't drink on Monday night because you should abstain for 24hrs so the craving is strong when you arrive. But the wine came out and I had to have some. At least not too much. But those days are over!
I love you guys and gals!