30 days???

[1967]

30 days???

me too tomorrow is day 3 for me.

[toughintexas]

30 days???

MA, this is us you are "talking" to, if we can't be honest here, we can't be honest anywhere, I have screwed up tons, I admit it, this is our safe place.....you said earlier, no matter what you were typing on, that you felt just like Mike, you were drinking sooooooo much, and you were calling your sponsor you were so scared....its OK....we've all been there, just don't sugar coat it, the truth will set you free.....or so I hope! Just let 'er rip, I've learned if I kid myself, or anyone else, the guilt gets ya. I love you, you are awesome, and we all deserve a better life, not just an existence!

[greeneyes]

30 days???

TIT, MA isn't drinking. She said I feel like drinking soooo much. The extra "m" was a typo. Vacation has been stressful, has a big drive ahead and you know who/what is at home. I swear, MA, get "car trouble" and stay here a day or two and recharge. Welcome mat is out there! You can get a prepaid phone card for pretty cheap you know.

[cowgal]

30 days???

South Carolina!!!!

Made it all the way to SC. And we are going to try to get to Atlanta so we only have 5 or so hours to go tomorrow........ Driving isn't that bad, so I actually wouldn't mind getting home at 2 or 3AM! Who knows what I will do if I get a wild hair!? It is soooooooo much easier to travel AF!!! I couldn't do this if I was drinking.........

Check in later........TIT, sorry I didn't check back in last night to clarify things for you...... Thanks greenie, sorry for all the typos, I am rushing while I wait for dinner on the road.........

Luv,

MA

[Niblet]

30 days???

Great to see ya Tex !!! Gosh how I've missed you xxxx
A warm welcome to you 1967... come here often and enjoy the company !
Well, we got home from our 25th anniversary trip on Friday and as you may recall our computer is working at 16.9 kbps (Slower than slow.. I thought that 31 kbps was slow) so I don't like to spend an hour just trying to complete a single task or download emails... gosh !
Well, since I was a little girl I wanted to see the "horse park" in Lexington Kentucky... I really thought that my dream was coming true... It turned out that the folks we were staying with only had Monday and Wednesday off making that trip impossible. They felt that we would be happy to slip over to Loiseville to see the Churchill Downs. What !?!... I was so sad inside but could say nothing because they were escorting our butts around Indianopolis... busy place to say the least! We did see a zoo, king tuts exibit as well as a wine tasting tour... We sure wish we would have known then what we know now because we wouldn't have made the 9 hour trip to their house to sit day in and day out visiting.. Sorry to complain but Louiseville got a flash flood and had to evacuate the horse barns making it impossible for me to even see Churchill Downs..... Don't get me wrong our friends are wonderful people, but they didn't understand when this trip was being planned that we want to see Lexington.
They will be coming to Canada where they have a camp on our lake this September, so I'll have them over for dinner... We'll have to make plans for next year.
I hope that you are home safe and sound by now MA... Congratulations for staying AF through all that stress. Yahoo to you !
Well, I've got to get my butt in gear, so take care everybody, Hugs, xxx

[cowgal]

30 days???

Well

Don't congratulate me, screwed up and and drank Sat and yesterday......hope I am not going to start spiraling down, cannot call Rhonda now that I just blew a few grand on this trip....... Back at work aost feeling hopeless, vacation was no "vacation",
Ore stress than anything, that is why I drank, just soooooo frustrated!!!!!

MA

[momof3]

30 days???

MA,

I don't come here to MWO anymore, but I do check in from time to time to see how some of my favorite foks are doing, you being one of them along with several others on this very special thread.

When you are not here daily, or weekly, you can begin to see the huge leaps in progress that folks are making or in some instances the ways they are stuck. I see from your posts that you do so well for awhile but then you fall back into old ways; living on the edge of alcohol all of the time so to speak. And, most of this appears to be because of your husband. I'm wondering what it will take for you to leave. And, if you can ever be free of the demon Al with him in your life. I am not walking in your shoes so of course I truly do not know your experiences and perspective. However, from your posts, I feel like you are at a fork in the road in terms of alcohol and your husband. I wish the very best for you.

[toughintexas]

30 days???

MA, sorry I misunderstood the other day, and sorry it came true anyway.....damnit, thats the way it always goes huh! I agree with Momof3, but we've all told you to ditch his ass before, so I guess just like with AL, you'll have to decide how much is enough, and decide yourself you don't want to live this way anymore, when you're really sick and tired of being sick and tired, you'll move on. You deserve better, but you have to realize that yourself. I'm on day 3 of baclofen, and it's really kicked in today, hubby started it too, and has euphoric feelings, seems to be a real mood uplifter too, I'm weaning off the prozac, baclofen is an anti-anxiety acting drug anyway. I'd really recommend you go real the stories of Bill P, and Zenstyle, and Billyb, on the threads on baclofen, Cinders is on it too, and swears by it, its cheap, no topa side effects, and seems to work really well. I drank some getting titrated up, but today, its really starting to make me indifferent to the "habit". I hope you are ok....you know we love ya!

[greeneyes]

30 days???

How's everybody doing?

TIT, I'm really excited about the baclofen! Did you see the link to the article where it shows the brain activity on baclofen? Fascinating!

MA, did you try the exercise she gave you? It goes without saying I'm with mom3 and TIT.

Luv, come on out of subs, OK?

Nibs, whatever happened with your toenail fungus? That was you, right?

1967, how goes it?

Where the hell is bird? again.

[cowgal]

30 days???

Yep

Greenie, I tried and tried, prayed and postponed, even called people, still NEEDED to drink and now I can't stop, I am back to the bad part of my life, Mike, of course is happy, or not bothered yet as I have been "functioning" so it hasn't "inconvenienced him yet", which if I don't get help tomorrow,Sat and Sun will be wasted.... Going to my doc for baclofen tomorrow, and to an accupincturist Sat.......Rhonda won't help an now they are on "vacation", want me to go to Boston, guesss they think I am made of $$$$ feeling VERY hopeless and sorry to even post this.

MA

[cowgal]

30 days???

ok,

Mike just home, throwing a FIT............................."so you are drinking today, how many beers did you have, 100", (like, I wonder how many he has had!!!???) we are having dinner w/ his dad, and I guess he wants me to be on the "up and up" to impress his FAT, DRUNK-ASS SELF!!!?? I know I am such am B^thch, but come on, he is an ASSHOLE.......................believe me More2, I talked to TIT last night, things are in motion for me to get out of this.......................

MA:l:h

[toughintexas]

30 days???

MA, you know, and we know he's an utter asshole....I can't even believe you are surprised at his "normal reaction"!!! He's such a hypocrite, but I don't even want to talk about him, this is about you. I want you to get on the bac, get your head back on straight, and get outta that mess for yourself and the boys, period! Hell, More2 and I might get tooted too much now and again, but I promise you this, our hubby's would be afraid to lay down and go to sleep at night if they treated us that way, we'd never stand for it, drunk or not! If I have to come kick your ass outta that place myself, I'll call for back-up, and I bet I can get a posse together, we'll even bring Nibs goat to ram your ass into a new life! I wouldn't even go to dinner with the asshole and his asshole Dad, period, not, nada, zip, zippo!!!! The phrase f--k you comes to mind real quick, what's he gonna do.....LEAVE YOU....OH BOY! Ok, nuf said!
Call me Friday when you get your Rx!!!

[cowgal]

30 days???

done

The thing is Zac as siding w/ mike, his dad (Mike's) was cool and unspoken the entire dinner, I wonder why I even went!?

Off to bed and hoping I start baclofen tomorrow as I cannnot keep this up, it is bad enough af, drinking makes it SUCK!!!!!!!!!

MA

[cowgal]

30 days???

TIT

I would LOVE for you and a posse to take ms away, Anyone........ I am So Sick of this............can't came quick enough, kids will be in college, I am going back to Boynton Bch. Without Him!!!!!! Need to unload horses which will kill my soul, but have finally decided I have NO choice...........wish I met a horse person here so I could keep them, but I wouldn't trust Mike w/ me having even a "male friend" at this point, he is wacked!!!!!!

MA

[brittzak]

30 days???

ok

I AM HERE BUT BARELY! I am not posting here in geneeral because there have been times I was ugly and drunk and you guys here dont deserve it. We are here to heal to hurt. I have suffered a lot of pain in my life...Billy's death...was actually a tiny piece of it all. I was abused by my step grandfather...my Mama knew did NOTHING.....she destroyed us......her children. MY sister has tried to kill herself more times than I can count. I left home at 16 to get away from the pain. I did great for years, but I suppose Billy's death has resurfaced this all. 2 months before her death Mama tellls me my father is not my father. He is on his way to my home now......I can not do through this emotional pain anymore. I stay sober for MONTHS....MONTHS but then I get in this dark spot and for me dark is BLACK...pitch balck. I FAINLLY told my Dad....why will DNA matter at 37 hell no but for years my life has been a lie. OR she is just a liar that tried to destroy her child, but either way...I gotta fix this pain. Thank-you for listening.