Hey guys :'-(

[dmarchelak]

Im sorry to mention this but I feel so awakward,
Was with my mum all of the day today and she was great, I heared her murmor earlier when she watched me buy the wine.
I am starting to get uncomfortable with this life, and im feeling very depressed. Things arent going in the direction i was hoping. I know this is a normal feeling for someone who drinks too much, but its such an overwhelming feeling. I dont know what to do.

Maybe its because i might be drunk, but i dont think it is. It's like I said on my previous message. I dont have confidence, I wish I was dead when I get into situations where I feel uncomfortable, but when I am drunk, like I am now sadly, I feel great, feel like I can take on the world and that no one is above me. But I know how I am going to feel tomorrow so its going to be a highly depressing day and a very ifficult day for me to deal with.

So sorry guys.
I love you all.
Dan
xxxx

[Beaches]

Hey guys :'-(

Hi Dan and Welcome, again

I have to tell you that when I came here I was very depressed with my whole life and who I was as a person. I didn't like the image in the mirror.

You can change that for yourself if you put your mind to it and get serious. Order the book to begin and figure out what path you want to take. I started with Topa then moved to the supplements and am doing great now. I am in such a better place and actually wake up liking myself in the morning.

Best of luck

[hablur]

Hey guys :'-(

Hey Dan!

Don't beat yourself up. You may feel worse tomorrow but come right back hear and we will still have encouraging words for you. You can get through this.

I don't know if you find this funny but I am having a tough day today and still I think you and I can both pull it off. Stick with this group... they will help.

I am not the best at giving any advice right now but I just wanted to say hang in there and take a day at a time. It will get better. Come post here whenever you need a pick-me-up

[dmarchelak]

Hey guys :'-(

Thankyou beaches,
I really appreciate your comment, but unfortunately like yourself, I am unable to afford items of help to assist me, thats why I am seeing all you guys for advice.

I really dont know what else to say, other than that I am really drunk, unfortunately, I am not proud of myself, but I was extreamily releaved when I was drunk. Even though I hurt my mum made her sad. I feel bad for it, but she really does have to deal with it because I'm not going to change, theres nothing more that I get excited about other than the poxy booze. And I am so sorry to her since I know she deserves so much better especially since she is recovering from her own extream alcohol addiction herself.

It's way more awakward than most people could possible understand, although I am not saying u dont understand because im sure u have had to deal with so much urself.
It;s just so fu'c'ke''d up atm.

DaN X

[dmarchelak]

Hey guys :'-(

and that was meant for u too halbur, soz i sent msg after u sent me that msg!

[happycamper68]

Hey guys :'-(

Dan,

If you can afford the booze you can afford the Topa, it costs less to take Topa than it does to drink on a daily basis, that is for sure. If you feel like you need immediate help though, and it sounds like you do, and I am fearful of your trying to do it by yourself, you should go to the hospital and detox. If at all possible you need to get the alcohol out of your system safely, then you will have some clarity of thought and will be able to take next steps. Can you do that? Are you ready to make a move?

Good luck, by your photo you look very young and if you can beat this now you can have a lifetime of happiness. Good Luck, Camper :h

[dmarchelak]

Hey guys :'-(

i dont think that this "topa" may be avaliable in england. i know i can get diazepam on prescription but thats a lil too much for me... lol.
im self medicating with cannabis,l that seems to be helping alot, i dont htink i could have come off drinking alcohol on a dependent scale if it wasnt for the marijuana.
I know its bad, but it helps me from getting extreamily psychotic.
Dan x

[happycamper68]

Hey guys :'-(

You can buy topa online, ask the Brits where they get theirs. I cannot remember the name of the website, I think it is eshoprx.com - do you have the website's book and stuff?

you should take your pic down, for anonymity, you never know who could see you on here. It also looks like you may have used your name as your screen name. be careful with stuff like that. Plus there are a lot of ladies on here that will be all over you, LOL! Just kidding!!!

Oh and watch the pot!! geez! You are better off tapering off booze on valium (under a doc's supervision) than pot!

[chris_ckd]

Hey guys :'-(

Dan, I think the thing that makes it worse for a lot of us is the constant anxiety. Smoking marijuana is only going to make that feeling worse. What you need to do is accept the alcohol for what it is, a disease. Get your self into a mindset that you are prepared to lose absolutely everything, this way you wont be anxious about material or wordly things. You need to get yourself better, and unfortunately, the first 3-8 days are by far the worse. Count the days, the hours or even the minutes if need be. Stay away from the pot and stay away from the wine store. You can do it Dan. - Chris.

[ScoobyDoo]

Hey guys :'-(

Dan, welcome aboard. I feel for you... *hug*

I'm curious as to how old you are. Do you think if you chat with your mum about how you are really feeling that she would be supportive?

Doo

[dmarchelak]

Hey guys :'-(

Thanks chris for ur words of support dude. I hear what you say and I kinda agree, however. Drinking puts me in a temporary state of happiness, I know that now and I accept that even though I wish to carry on with it, yet cannabis doesnt cause me any violent behavior, rudness to people, being nasty and mallicious for no reason.
I find cannabis to be a support for me, I always did since I was 15, maybe thats a completely different addiction that I have to come to terms with, but I feel alcohol has to be the first since its caused so much family problems, issues with friends and general self hate. I find that when i smoke marijuana, that all my pain, mental and physical seems to disappear and thats what I like, that feeling of complete happiness. I know I got to reach it in a totally different mannor than the way I am doing now, but you know, its a little bit supportive. And yes, I have heared my friends say moving from one thing to the next isnt going to help, but personally for me it does!! Thanx Chris!!! X

[dmarchelak]

Hey guys :'-(

Hey scooby I am 19, i chatted with my mum, she was a sever alcoholic dependent herself, but shes recovered and doing well, and yeah i think she can understand me, but I think its more personal to me not to mention the hurt and pain she caused me and my brother when we was younger with her alcohol induced violence, so sometimes it feels like im beating her by being nasty to her before she gets the chance to do it to me. i know its sounds pathetic, but i am mentally affected by the things she has made me experience in my life.

[chris_ckd]

Hey guys :'-(

OK, Dan read up in the reply to me in the first sentence. Operative word in that sentence is TEMPORARY. As far as your friends telling you that you are going from one thing to another, they are right. Although Pot is not a physical addiction, it is in fact a mental addiction. Now, couple that with the alcohols mental addiction, it could very well lead you to physical alcohol addiction if it hasnt already. Dan, you want to quit and it is obvious. I agree with Camper on this one Dan, you are too young and inexperienced in life to seek out past life experiences to get you through this. Since you are also genetically inclined to alcoholism, the only thing for you to do is MAKE at least 5 days and check into detox center. Not sure what your insurance is like there, or if there is a public facility for it, but if it is impossible, then get your hands on some type of anti anxiety medicine and find the closest group of friends that you know and ask if they will watch you 24/7 for five days. Make sure there is plenty of food and water and they understand what the end result is going to be. Rent plenty of videos, stay away from newspapers and TV in general. Shut the phone off also and keep the outside world OUTSIDE. You can do this Dan, but you may not be able to do this alone. YOU are WAY too young to be having problems Dan, of which most of us are associating our issues to alcohol. You have your entire life ahead of you, kick yourself in the ass and make the rest of your life a productive one. Show pride and respect in yourself and the rest of the world will see it. - Chris.

[irishlady]

Hey guys :'-(

Dan, marvellous advice there for you, the next step now is for you to take it.. I think you know what you have to do.. There is a whole new life waiting out there for you, take the first step now towards it, don't look back, look forward, you CAN do it, and we are all here to help and support you on your journey..

Good luck,

Louise xx

[Guest]

Hey guys :'-(

Dan you can order everything online....what you will save not drinking will pay for it...but I KNOW...you'd have to be able to stay AF a few days to save first. Is there anyone you could ask to assist you? It is ok to need help, but I also know asking is hard. keep coming here for support...