SELF CONCEPT

[Guest]

Ok....just real quick....just got the idea.
What could we do here to work on our SELF CONCEPT?
Who has any ideas? I just recently bought the Dr Phil book "Life Strategies". I havent started yet. Its has a workbook. Maybe we could get some ideas from it or something?
Maybe it could be something RJ puts in the new stuff!
Gabs

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

I'd personally love to do some work on that.......you are GREAT gabby!! that is an awesome idea, let us know what to do,you can be the "leader" on this one!

I'll bet many of us have self image/concept issues....never addressed in AA, which is why it also didn't do much for me.............let me know what I can do besides buy the book, think I will!?: :b

Mary Anne:h :happy

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

My self image is finally beginning to improve, now that I see what can be done when I put my mind to something! Long story, won't go into it now, those of you who know me well know what I'm talking about! (Just used to feel pretty DEpendent, stuck in a "rut", fat, tired, lots of yucky things I have come a loooooong way on!!!).
Would definitely love to participate in this, now that we're working together to be buff, beautiful, strong, independent babes and dudes!
Not a big fan of Dr. Phil. But I'd be interested in any other activities/books/groups/threads, WHATEVER. I know this is a branch of the "forgiveness" thread. Looks like there are many people dealing with some really heavy issues. Let's keep helping each other through:h
Becca

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

Hi Becca, you say you have come a long way, is it MWO that has helped you int this!! I am not sure that people really say how the programme has helped them, not like RJ in her book, but maybe I need to read more posts.

thanks sophia

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

I'm not good at being a leader. We dont have to do Dr Phil either. I did a group tho with Pia Melody "Codependancy" . It was great. Does anyone know any other workbooks? I'll look on amazon. I dont know how we could do something here tho. Are there any "counselours (sp) here in the bunch? They could at least get us started. Really we dont need a facilator. Every put your head to it and I will too.
RJ.....what do you think? Gabs

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

Hi Sophia.
YES, this program has been a true blessing for me. Almost lost my marriage, my sanity, my life. I'm NOT exaggerating for effect here. It was a "rock bottom" situation. My husband and I were having serious marrital problems (turned out not completely related to my drinking, but nonetheless...it contributed hugely), and like I said, I was a good 15 pounds overweight, lazy, getting too drunk too often for no good reason. Major rut. Saw no real "way out". Refused AA or other treatment, because that didn't fit into my beliefs or my schedule, and I didn't think I was "that bad" or "like that"!!! Isn't that weird? But I know others felt that way after I found this site. A LOT of others!
So I found this site Feb 7th of this year. Signed on immediately and ordered the book, started getting the supps, went to my doctor, the whole she-bang! Oh, except for the hypno, it took me a while to get into that, and I kind of tweak that with doing a ton of overload on my exercise bit of the program. That's when I do all my deep thought and reinforcement.
Doctor insisted I go see an addiction counsellor and everything. I obliged. We did the whole "why do I drink" thing. And that's where I'm at now! The counsellor and I never got to a deep rooted cause. We laughed and joked that "geesh, I just grew up with a bunch of people who deemed it completely acceptable to drink for every occasion, nearly every day...". No abuse here, parents still together (I am very lucky and grateful).
Sure, I have my issues with mother in law nutjobs and marrital problems (seems- who doesn't?: ), and I'm in the process of trying to be STRONGER. When hubby takes a business call and is rude to me, don't be P*ssed, shrug it off (cuz he doesn't even know he did it) and go on with my day, because IT'S NOT WORTH MY TIME WORRYING ABOUT IT!! Not worth my precious energy! And certainly not worth my hangover cuz I cried into a glass of wine.

That was just the longest answer in history to a simple question. But it is how this program is helping me. To see these women... and talk to them... YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!! I bend so many ears here!! Never been a member of a support group before, but I GET IT!

Oh, and Gabby, don't feel like you have to lead this. It can be one of those things that takes on a life of it's own, maybe. I just think it's a wonderful idea. Obviously.

:h :d Becca

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

Becca..

Loved the "KNOW WHO YOU ARE "... I think that may be THE bottom line here.................

Thank you for sharing so nicely.

Blessings,
NAncy:d

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

What we paint ourselves to be is who we are. Some of us drink because we don't like the picture.

One of my biggest issues besides alcohol is weight. I have to lose ten pounds and want to lose twenty. Ten years ago I lost 45 pounds and have started to put it back on again. I work in the weight loss industry, so it is important that I set an example.

My biggest problem is that I just could not get past the fact that I allowed myself to let my weight creep back up. I used food as a punnishment - the worst thing I could do to myself is gain the weight back, and I wasnt' worthy because I was failing, so I ate and hated myself even more.

Drinking is the same way. I see myself when I'm drinking and I hate the picture I paint. The next day, I can't get past the fact that I did it to myself again and drink to punnish myself for being such a loser.

The hypno tapes are helping me get past that. The mere process of losing the weight makes me feel better. That's all it takes - getting started. Not to mention that part of my process is not drinking, so how could I not feel better. What I have to focus on is that:

RIGHT NOW, AT THIS MOMENT EVERYTHING IS OKAY. I AM STILL A LOVELY PERSON WHO IS WORTHY OF A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE. JUST BECAUSE I EAT AND DRINK MORE THAN I SHOULD DOESN'T MAKE ME A BAD PERSON. FOCUS ON WHAT COMES NEXT - ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER.

Barb

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

One of the things that has occurred to me recently (someone posted this and it stuck in my mind) is that we are in a way guinea pigs. This is a program that is still evolving. It has this amazing energy that new movements have, and even with the rapid growth, it's not as big as it is going to get. Because the research is still being done, it's going to be huge, and when the drugs are accepted and it all goes public, there will be millions of people looking at what RJ has done. Anyway, the CDs are helping me a lot with self esteem. I don't like the guy's voice much, but I find that I can listen and then emerge ready to believe in myself. I think that hypno can do a lot to wash away a lot of the damage of the past. There is also a new concept called "mindfulness" that is being used with PTSD patients that sounds interesting.

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

self concept

I think all of your comments are correct and very informed. As for myself, I've gone to a hypnotherapist a couple of times and found some issues (not totally resolved) but I have found a hypnotherapy tape which is about forgetting bad relationships because I learned that a couple of my major turning points where I stopped hobbies and such and started turning to bottles were related to a couple of major relationship issues. So, I'll start with the one hypnotherapy tape to forget the bad relationships, then I'll see if I can find one to let go of the guilt for bad decisions made for the right reasons..any thoughts?:eek

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

self talk

Well, I have no self help books that come to mind, but I am trying to be easier on myself on self talk. I would never say to other people the things I say to myself! "You are so fat!" "Your hair is such a mess!" "And, are you are seriously going to wear that in public!"
I want to be nicer in what I say to ME! It all goes back to that self-loathing pattern of "I hate myself"---I mean when I greet myself every morning that way for 20 years what do I expect, "why don't you go have a big bottle of wine you big, fat drunk!" ...so, I'm working on that.
I want to say things like "You look great in those pants! They didn't fit 3 months ago!" Little baby steps.
(I'm re-reading this, and I sound like I'm bipolar--I'm not!)
Buff and Beautiful, was that it Rebecca??!
Have a great day Beautiful Ones!
SM

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

Re: self talk

I mean it when I say I really love you all. You are truly such strong and inspirational women (and men :happy ). You all put a smile on my face. I am so, so, so glad to be here. You are all such strong, special, beautiful people and I hope each and every one of you know how much you are worth.

Jen

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

self talk

Gabby (I just spelled that Baggy!! TOPA!!??)
I didn't really mean "leader", well I didn't know what I meant, but I was just so excited about the topic, think it could benefit lots of us.:rollin

I know personally I am always doing the "negative"self talk, would love to look in the mirror and say "hey good looking BUFF chick!" that sounds nicer than what I actually think tough (not so sweet)

The CDs do help if I could stay awake for the whole thing! I (and I have heard others have this same prob) haven't heard one in it's entirity as of yet!!

Gabby, or Baggy, great topic, and it doesn't have to be Dr. Phil either, just was excited, haven't read any of his books, except the diet one...............nothin new there(have read EVERY diet book ever written!):eek :lol

Mary Anne:h :d

[Guest]

SELF CONCEPT

Re: self talk

Thanks Mary Anne, I know ya didnt mean literaly for me to be the leader. Now baggy is a different story. I know how ya are!!!! :d gabs