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RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

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    RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

    These are pictures of Billy's car. I share these with you so you can see what we had to see the day after learning we had lost our loved one to DRUNK DRIVING....our world was literally turned inside out within seconds. On 4/23/06 at approximately 11:00 PM I saw headlights coming down the driveway...I thought Billy was home. Since he had left earlier in the day very angry at me over something truly that was NOTHING, it isn't even worth mentioning...a petty argument, I was on guard. However, when I opened the door what I saw was far from what I had anticipated...his brother stood in front of me with tears in his eyes, two highway patrol behind him, and a guy in a white long sleeved shirt, which I later learned was the coroner. Everyone looked so sad...I think at that moment I knew what had happened, but instead of accepting it, I asked what he had done. I wanted to think he had gotten himself into trouble. Michael, Billy's brother, said for me to sit down...I said "no". I started to cry and asked what had happened. He said Billy had been in an accident and was killed.......That he had hit a tree...my first question was had he seen him and he said he had not. I didn't believe it was him, someone stole the car...Mustang GT, loaded, we had just spent 3,500.00 recently fixing it up really sporty rims, etc...a desirable car by many theives, right? The officer then stepped forward and said it was him they had found his wallet...WELL...that proves it was stolen to me...he NEVER carried his wallet. Left it in the middle console of the car. He looked so sad...rookie cop...his first time having to tell someone this type news and I refuse to accept the reality. So he begins to describe him to me...descriptive markings ONLY he had...tattoo on his arm, etc...I sit in floor and begin to sob. Micahel picks me up, we have to go to the hospital. Their mom had collapsed and been taken there and Billy's body was being taken there for idetification.
    I never saw him. I never said good-bye. His brother had viewed his body and he was so damaged he was almost unrecognizable. He was cremated. His blood alcohol level was .22.
    I will never forget the look on my childrens face when I told them he was gone, the numerous calls to family and friends, and the pain and suffering of this past year. Depression quickly settled in...I nearly lost all control. Over the past 12 months I have totaled 3 cars, went to jail three times, gotten in a fist fight....it is insane and 1 year ago, no one I knew would ever believe this. I am sure Billy is very disappointed. I have managed to keep all of this SHHHH from my professional life and ex-husband for the most part....but, I knew I was in trouble and for the sake of my life and my children, I have to regain my senses. I found MWO almost 2 months ago. I have slipped terribly a few times, but got up, dusted off, and I am starting again. Although, this past year has been very painful, what I have learned is alcohol doesn't take the pain away, it makes it far worse.
    I will forever love and miss Billy, but I am still alive, but if I do not make drastic changes , I won't be. Thank-you all for the love and support of this site, it has truly SAVED MY LIFE!!!!
    LUVUALL

    #2
    RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

    Luv, words cannot really express to you my sadness, but I am so glad you found us and are making this change in your life. Billy is proud, of that I am certain. I am so sorry for your loss, and as I said in my PM to you I admire the hell out of you for choosing to go AF during this particularly rough anniversary. I wish you nothing but happy times ahead. Lots of love to you!!!:l
    I'm really easy to get along with once people learn to worship me

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      #3
      RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

      You are stronger than you know...tap into that strength....cry when you need to...big hugs my friend..I cannot imagine your pain but, I can be here for support. Keep sharing and posting we love you all the more...
      Sometimes I wonder...."Why is that frisbee getting bigger?"...and then it hits me.

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        #4
        RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

        Thanks for sharing Luv:huggy

        Always know you've got Billy by your side.

        You've been doing so well lately & I'm sure he's very proud of you-we are!

        Luv-You're doing all the work...we're just here for the ride (& the occassional harassments)! Keep up the good work.

        Thanks again for sharing- I remember his picture from your other post & he is truly an angel.
        :flower: Change a life; make someone feel important. ................. ........................ ..................... ........................ ................. ....... sigpic

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          #5
          RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

          Luv, he will always be with you as will we. Love and hugs kim
          Yesterday I dared to struggle. Today I dare to win!!

          Comment


            #6
            RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

            I am speechless.
            I can't even imagine the enormous pain you must be going through.
            I am sure Billy is very proud that you are working on turning your life around.
            Just keep working on one day at a time. Sounds like you are off to a great start!

            Comment


              #7
              RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

              Luvuall,
              I dont think I have the words to describe how I feel after reading your incredible post.
              I am so sad for your loss but I am so glad for your choice to free yourself from this curse we all have.This beast isnt some fun little creature we all tell tales of (what we can remember) what we did when we were blind...... it's a killer.
              Your post brought me to tears and touched me deeply, it is a haunting reminder of why I'm on this journey,thank you for that.
              I think your post should be put, prominantly, on the web site as a reminder to all of what we are all fighting here.
              I look forward to getting to know you.
              Love
              Victoria xxooxx

              Comment


                #8
                RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

                Hello Luvuall,
                I don't know what to say, except that you have been, and are going through, an awful experience. I can only wish you well.

                Paulx

                Comment


                  #9
                  RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

                  :h Luv,

                  I have a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes from your post. I am so very sorry for your loss and it is a great reminder of why we are all here. Thank you for sharing it with us. I would do anything to take some of the pain away for you. This site is good for making the load a bit lighter and I hope that is your experience here. I have enjoyed getting to know you in chat and I wish you peace.

                  xoxoxoxo

                  Comment


                    #10
                    RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

                    Luv,

                    I have a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes from your post. I am so very sorry for your loss and it is a great reminder of why we are all here. Thank you for sharing it with us. I would do anything to take some of the pain away for you. This site is good for making the load a bit lighter and I hope that is your experience here. I have enjoyed getting to know you in chat and I wish you peace.

                    xoxoxoxo

                    :h

                    Comment


                      #11
                      RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

                      Hey Luv

                      You know I think you are a special gal already so I don't need to tell you again

                      BUT I WILL!!!

                      You have been such a source of strength and support to me. Lean right back whenever you need to. You are amazing.

                      Kate x

                      Comment


                        #12
                        RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

                        Luvuall, We love you too!!!! Thanks for sharing that with us, stay strong love xx
                        sigpicXXX

                        Comment


                          #13
                          RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

                          LUV,
                          I thank you so much for sharing your story. I can't even imagine the pain this has caused you and your family.
                          I am glad you are here and you are doing great.
                          xo
                          "Keep your eyes and heart focused on the end goal at all times, and never settle for less."

                          Comment


                            #14
                            RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

                            Luvuall, My heart goes out to you at this time... Try to remember that the pain won't always be this raw.. As all wounds heal with time, so will this one... It will leave you with a sadness though which will come over you from time to time but, I know you will have the strength to handle it..

                            Thinking of you,
                            Love, Louise xxx
                            A F F L..
                            Alcohol Free For Life

                            Comment


                              #15
                              RIP: WILLIAM ARNOLD EDWARDS 4-23-06

                              Thank-you all for your kind words and support. One thing I meant to add was I am 7 days today AF. I promised myself I would make it 30 days and started the week before Billy's death anniversary...for me, my kids, and him. Staying drunk would not help this weekend and we all need each other. Off to the doc this AM for hopefully, I prescription of Topa!!!! Lots of hugs to you all...

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