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[Paddy]

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Yes! And you, Breez will have you mouth washed out with chili and sent to bed without dinner! There!

[Paddy]

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What was that Gabsters? You're buying an apartment with your lawyer? Topa is having a heavy toll on you. Am I OFF TOPIC?

[betty boop]

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Hi All, thanks for this Paddy ...

[chrysa]

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Glad it is back to funny. But I wholeheartedly agree that apologies are "always" in order if sincere, "always". It is so easy to screw up on the internet but as long as we personally reflect when it happens & take a little action, if sincere, to correct...

You are still totally adorable Gabby!! Luv ~C

I was on a site the other day & whenever new member jioined the site admin would send a personal email to the new member welcoming them and listing the etiquette. That could for old & new members. Her eis what that site had to say:

Dear Members,
* This letter is sent out to new members and monthly to all group members.
* If you are familiar with and practice these guidelines already, please feel free to disregard.
* We are a large group and with over 3,000 members it can become challenging to follow some posts as well as to maintain the focus or our original founders who are students of ACIM and DU.
* Replies like one-liners with 'thank you' and 'good job' are better sent to the individual and not to the group. We have a high amount of email and this helps cut down on the number of emails members receive that aren't relevant to their own growth.
* Please abstain from sending marketing links and off-topic posts on a regular basis. It's ok to share a topic once in a while, particularly if it is occupying your mind and you need to run it by others or work through it.
What follows is a standard netiquette recommendation for those unfamiliar with posting in internet groups and is printed here to assist with new members on how to do this productively. If you already are familiar with this type of listserv, you can ignore the rest of this letter.
In Appreciation,

To make everyone's experience in the group more pleasant, we keep the guidelines below and would ask for your cooperation on keeping them as well:

[kitkatsue]

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Sorry if I have ever broken the rules sometimes they are difficult to remember especially if you are going through something stressful and want to share.

kitkat

[Paddy]

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Let me say this, too, these could just be guidelines. This is RJ's site. I did not in any way want to appear presumptuous or anything by posting this.

[happycamper68]

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Paddy yes a thank you from moi too.

[Roberta Jewell]

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Thanks, Paddy and others

Paddy, you're fine and I appreciate you sharing the suggestions. I think members will find them useful. We only added our FAQ information (found in the blue navigation banner above) a month or so ago, but the information contained there is not nearly as detailed.

As many of you know, I've always been pretty liberal when it come to rules about posting here. (Unless you're spammer.) But I understand how intimidating it can be for people to take that first step and I haven't wanted to create any barriers. The rules and regs on some sites are so restrictive as to send potential members running the other direction. I also want to create an environment that's flexible and comfortable and allows people to feel that they're "doing it right" regardless of how they do it.

Having said that, I can see that I've probably been remiss in providing a little more guidance about simple rules of courtesy. So again, Paddy, your list is very helpful and with your permission, I'll include some of those items in one of the FAQ links.

Here's another example of message board guidelines (for a soap opera forum of all things) and it also contains some good stuff. It's well organized and comprehensive. I just may steal it. I took note of two items in particular given recent activity:

"You can disagree without flaming. You can set forth a different point of view without attacking someone else personally."

And this:

"Follow the Golden Rule. When posting, treat others as you'd like to be treated -- don't be insulting and don't harass others. Everyone who posts on this board is a real person, just like you."

Thanks again, gang.

RJ

[southernbelle47]

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Ok children!
I'm so happy that Paddy has been thoughtful enough to post the "rules" for us!

I was thinking this might be a good idea but couldn't figure out how to say it!

So sorry if I've ever bent the rules....it was unintended.


I love you ALL.
Nancy

[happycamper68]

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OMG Fan please let it go, please you are only embarrassing yourself. Please enough already.
Part of the rules are to let go of past issues.

[happycamper68]

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Thanks Fan!

[Determinatrix]

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It is part of human emotion to get angry, defensive, or upset. It is even more complicated when matched with over-drinking, I think.
Many over-drinkers use alcohol to avoid dealing with emotions, so when they stop over-drinking,
they have to now deal with many emotions that they may never have really dealt with before.

So we should expect some freaking out.

We all have baggage: our issues, our hot buttons, our defense mechanisms.

This place seems designed for us to bring our baggage here; for us to feel safe dealing with a secret most of our loved ones are not privy to.
So we store our baggage under the bed. Every now and then we pull that baggage out and fling it all over the room.
But then we get it together, pack it all back up, and shove it under the bed again.
Sometimes when we are packing it back up, we find there are some things we just don't need to hold onto anymore, that we can let go.

Feel what we need to feel, but take responsibility and clean it up.
It would be helpful if we wouldn't be so destructive, since we know that we will be apologizing for it,
and that sometimes apologies are not accepted if the cut is too deep.

Let's work hard to preserve the sacred sanity this place offers us.

Respectfully, Dx

[Roberta Jewell]

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Fan

I do feel that was uncalled for and I will, indeed, follow up privately. Please, no more public references to grievances in chat and harm you feel is associated with activity there. The regulars around here may understand what you're referring to, but it's simply unfair to newbies who may turn away from a helpful and healing opportunity to connect with others. I've heard from them and I am unable to control the effect of repeated innuendo that has cropped up all over this board. It does no good for anyone here, you included, to hang on to this.

Fan and Camper, no more barbs. I will close this thread before it spirals out of control and take whatever other action is necessary.

RJ

[happycamper68]

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Ok RJ.

[Roberta Jewell]

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Thanks, Dx

For reminding us what this place is about. :-)

Also glad to see we're back on track.

RJ