choice

[little beagle]

I am looking for opinions. Is drinking and other addictions a choice? Other forums are telling me that addiction is caused by deep emotional pain and drugging and drinking is not a choice. These people are not responsible for their actions. What? Am I misunderstanding this? If so, what a load of horsehockey.
in my opinion we are all accountable for our actions. Sure some addicts are so far gone illness drives them on, but I feel their getting to that point was a lot of bad choices.
Please any input on this subject will help me. Inam trying to decide what actions to take with people in my house choosing to cross my boundaries time and again. Ie. No drugs.

[Dottie Belle]

choice

I think it is a choice...I may have had the predisposition to do this based on family history but I chose to drink...now I choose not to drink....it is not an easy choice but that is my take on it.

[red67]

choice

I believe it is a choice also. One thing I learned that really helped me in AA was the definition of being powerless over my addiction. I did not like being referred to as powerless, made me feel weak and not in control. But what I learned was that I had power over whether to take the first drink and if I did then I became powerless. So I have a choice to become powerless over my addiction and I choose to have the power and not take that first drink.

[available]

choice

Hard one LB but i am going with choice also. I have a choice to feed the addiction and i chose now not to feed it. Like my son with a crack addiction it was his choice to take it and his choice alone to give it up and ask for help as well but the help was due more to the withdrawals associated with such a horrible drug.

[hadit]

choice

Think it is a choice LB. Though I think addiction gets to a point where it is so strong and out of control it SEEMS like we don't have a choice, but we do, it has to be doesn't it? thanks LB

[Kradle123]

choice

Hi LB- I definitely believe this is a choice and more so once we learn the truth of our addictions once the physical addiction us gone.
Also, one thing we all suffer have years of AL abuse is denying our boundaries. Sounds like you already know yours are being crossed,

Hugs and Heart
:l:h

[vynan]

choice

Its absolutely choice driven. But in advanced stages, I would call addiction a disease, mental or physical depends from person to person I guess, but its just my way of looking at things

[Hypernova]

choice

red67;1609235 wrote: But what I learned was that I had power over whether to take the first drink and if I did then I became powerless.

Good one red. I like the way it sounds and the feeling it gives me. I have power(of choice) but if i choose wrong and surrender my power I become powerless to my foe. Losing control brings on all kinds of maladies so why would I choose this. I guess it gets down to impulses. Resist the impulse and make the right choice.~~ Thanks red & also to littlebeagle for beginning the thread.

[Pavati]

choice

red67;1609235 wrote: I believe it is a choice also. One thing I learned that really helped me in AA was the definition of being powerless over my addiction. I did not like being referred to as powerless, made me feel weak and not in control. But what I learned was that I had power over whether to take the first drink and if I did then I became powerless. So I have a choice to become powerless over my addiction and I choose to have the power and not take that first drink.

That is IT for me, Red. I hated believing I was powerless. Well, it turns out I am not - I am all powerful in deciding to not take that first drink (and it living a life and creating a plan for myself so that I do not make that decision).

I agree that in the later stages it might feel like you don't have a choice, but there is always a choice to ask for help. That being said, I know it is not easy.

I read a memoir written by a mother and daughter who had lived through the daughter's addiction. The daughter absolutely credited her mother's refusal to let her in her house as key to her finally getting sober. I am not saying that would be easy and I am not recommending it to you, LB, - I haven't been in your shoes. (By the way, the book is The Lost Years by Kristina Wandzliak (or something like that) and Constance Curry.

Anyway - choice but there are some mitigating circumstances... That's my vote.

[Guitarista]

choice

Hiya LB and y'all,

I think some folks are predisposed to becoming addicted more so than others. I reckon genetics are a factor. So we may not choose to become addicted, but i believe we can choose to stop it. Then staying stopped is the challenge, and people who have been hurt somehow, damaged as kids, or as adults through environmental factors, can find their choice of staying stopped too painful if they cannot address the hurt and start to heal. Just my take on it.

Take care LB.

[spuddleduck]

choice

Guitarista;1609322 wrote: Hiya LB and y'all,

I think some folks are predisposed to becoming addicted more so than others. I reckon genetics are a factor. So we may not choose to become addicted, but i believe we can choose to stop it. Then staying stopped is the challenge, and people who have been hurt somehow, damaged as kids, or as adults through environmental factors, can find their choice of staying stopped too painful if they cannot address the hurt and start to heal. Just my take on

Take care LB.

mr g, I read through this thread and that is exactly what I was going to say. most people try drinking at some stage in life (usually teens/twenties) and as no one expects to become addicted its no big deal. its when we realise that we are addicted or have a problem that the choice becomes important. I didn't do anything differently to my friends who I grew up drinking with, in fact I drank a lot less than most people, but I ended up with a problem and they didn't. that wasn't my choice (who would choose the living hell that we go through).but once we get to this place yes we do have a choice..... basically to live or die

[YouKayBee]

choice

spuddleduck;1609346 wrote: mr g, I read through this thread and that is exactly what I was going to say. most people try drinking at some stage in life (usually teens/twenties) and as no one expects to become addicted its no big deal. its when we realise that we are addicted or have a problem that the choice becomes important. I didn't do anything differently to my friends who I grew up drinking with, in fact I drank a lot less than most people, but I ended up with a problem and they didn't. that wasn't my choice (who would choose the living hell that we go through).but once we get to this place yes we do have a choice..... basically to live or die

This was my experience too, I knew the dangers but society makes consumption of most drugs quite normal - even illegal ones. So you try them, you have a few bad hangovers, oh it's just having a good time, some people cross the line into addiction. The only choice you do make is to stay in it, for years I was in denial, sure I was accessing help but kept blaming things about it, sure some of it isn't helpful or useful, but I was always blaming this situation, that situation, not the fact it was drinking in the first place getting me into dodgy situations.

[little beagle]

choice

This is very helpful. I choose not to drink. I hate being powerless. I am definitely powerless after that first drink.

[poppy62]

choice

I am with Spuddleduck and UK blond nobody expects to become the person who cant walk away from drink when they first start drinking. I feel its is definately a genetic pre-disposition to become addicted but that it is not an opinion that is presented in the public domain. Drinking is presented as being socially accepted and plays a large role in majority of celebrations and social occasions , so very difficult to avoid, especially when you are young and may not be as aware of you al problem and when getting drunk is seen as a normal young persons activity and a huge laugh. I think choice comes into it once you realise you have a problem then you can choose to deal with the situation or deny it. I think for most of us accepting and dealing with the problem is never an easy or quick process.

I have worked with people who are involved in drug but never taken them myself but drug taking like drink can be part of a social culture with big pressures by others in the group, especially dealers to keep you addicted, there is help but it is not often easy to access. Everything we do and say is guided by choice but those choices are often influensed and guided by thing other than our oursleves , so making the 'choice' debate not as black and white as it would often first appear !!. I choose not to drink only taken me 35 years to get there !!. I long time coming but a very worthy choice me thinks !!

[Sunbeam]

choice

I agree that we do choose to pick up that bottle or glass. But because of the difficulty of addiction, it is not as easy as choosing to have a piece of delicious chocolate or not. There are so many games we play as we slowly come to terms with this problem.