TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

[TrueGrit]

This thread is going to be updated as much as possible through my moderation journey. I created a post in "just getting started" about my moderation movement and there were some people that really did not believe that it could be done through their experience and I am sure that is true as this might be a hard thing for people to do that are really good friends with AL...too good of friends. I put it here in the General Discussion as I do not see some of those that posted really taking a trip down to the moderation threads.

I have not had a drink since Monday which puts me at three days sober and Friday and Saturday will be my days to enjoy drinking. I will be brutally honest about what is going on in my moderation and any ugly detail will be for all to view if there are any at all. I will update this on Monday and any infractions, which I will force myself to not allow, during the week and again updated on Thursday.

I look forward to being able to use this to keep myself accountable and to also show those that didn't believe that it is a thing that can be accomplished.

Thanks to everyone that decides to take this trip with me in advance!

[Overit-still]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

I'll be waiting anxiously for your posts. Not to see how/when you fail but to see how you accomplish this. I am all for personal experiments with one's self and challenging oneself. Good luck to you. See you Monday.

[TrueGrit]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

Overit-still;1614480 wrote: I'll be waiting anxiously for your posts. Not to see how/when you fail but to see how you accomplish this. I am all for personal experiments with one's self and challenging oneself. Good luck to you. See you Monday.

Awesome. Glad to have you along for the ride! See you Monday.

[bettygirl]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

sounds like a plan man. more power to you!

[TrueGrit]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

bettygirl;1614510 wrote: sounds like a plan man. more power to you!

Thanks! I hope to see you around the thread.

[j-vo]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

I'm sure this modding thing can be done, but the question is, will you be happy while doing this, not all-consumed with weekends, or the next time you get to drink? Will those be the only times you'll be happy, or feel comforted? The whole culture thing actually surprises the hell out of me. I didn't know it was like that. So if a person has a serious illness, mental or physical, they expect you to drink - respect for them comes before your health? Good luck TG. I've tried many times and failed at modding. Not because I'm not strong, but just the way my brain is wired I guess.

[TrueGrit]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

j-vo;1614571 wrote: I'm sure this modding thing can be done, but the question is, will you be happy while doing this, not all-consumed with weekends, or the next time you get to drink? Will those be the only times you'll be happy, or feel comforted?
That was a very intelligent question and one that I actually considered while planning this out. When I did this before half assed I did not white knuckle it to the weekends and nearing the second month I found a lot of happiness during the week especially with my children. Then again I did not want to make that moderation a lifestyle choice at that time like I do now. I guess time will tell and I can tell you one thing, if I am miserable during the week and only looking forward to the weekend than I will call the whole thing off and become abstinent...I could not see myself living like that either.

j-vo;1614571 wrote: The whole culture thing actually surprises the hell out of me. I didn't know it was like that. So if a person has a serious illness, mental or physical, they expect you to drink - respect for them comes before your health?

The way they view things has a lot to with the turmoil and pure hell they have had to endure as Cambodians/Khmer. They hate hospitals as they see that as a place where people go to die. If someone shows that they are ill than they try to mask it and act as normal otherwise it is a sign of weakness and there is no such thing alcoholism in their culture...they do see it a bit now since they have assimilated somewhat but they still call it a weakness and something that can be cured relatively easily. Their remedy for hangovers and even giving birth is booze with a wood mixture that someone said was blessed. A lot has to do with them being from a third world agricultural society and some from the torment they had to suffer during the Khmer rouge. I could go into it a lot more but those are the basics.

j-vo;1614571 wrote: Good luck TG. I've tried many times and failed at modding. Not because I'm not strong, but just the way my brain is wired I guess.

I would never say that anyone was not strong here especially since so many here have conquered it, you are right to say about how the brain is wired among certain people. I guess I will have to figure where I stand both willpower wise and wired wise. Thank you for the wishes!

[halo]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

True Grit, I was able to accomplish 5 1/2 months AF by constantly posting on the MWO, once I stopped it didn't take me long to slide back into the world of AL much to my dismay. I think it's great you have started your own thread to keep yourself on track regarding your goals. I hope you know that all the advice you receive is out of concern and support. Please don't let any comments deter you from keeping AL at bay. Wishing you the best and please continue to post as I believe it will help you in your quest.

[spuddleduck]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

Truegrit, just want to add my support to you on your journey.

As you've found out it can be difficult to say you are going to try and moderate around here. I'm a big believer in working stuff out yourself. Take on board all the advice given and then choose YOUR WAY OUT.
Im in the early stages with nal/tsm so I guess im kind of trying to moderate myself. Only time will tell how it goes for me.

You sound determined to make this work and I wish you all the best.

[TrueGrit]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

Halo and Spuddleduck, Thank you for your kinds words. I hope you stick around the thread. Update coming Monday.

[Sunbeam]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

True Grit, I believe this is a great way for you and others to get a handle on your drinking. Many people are simply not ready to quit. Some are successful at cutting back. I hung out here mostly on the mods thread for three years or so. For that amount of time my life was improved over what it had been before I started posting here. I finally decided to go AF because I was tired of the struggle. This is an educational road, with many stops along the way.

[halo]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

True Grit, hope you are doing well....

[spuddleduck]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

hey truegrit, i may have the wrong movie (and your name may not be from it) but if it is the movie i think... it has one of my favourite words...... : this thief on my tongue has stolen my brain' .. or something along those lines. . hope things are good with you.,

[TrueGrit]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

Update post.

UPDATE POST UPDATE POST

I know that its not Monday just quite yet but I am going to be incredibly busy right off the bat tomorrow.

This is copy and pasted from the journal I am starting.

Friday 17th 2014
Woke up this morning and actually felt really good, I also did not wake up to a soaking wet pillow and it seems that the sweat are done with. I did not have any cravings for booze throughout the day even though I knew I would be drinking, that could also be because I KNEW I would have it later on.

There are plans to get together with the family tonight which sounds great because I am full of energy and ready to get out of the house with the kids.

Family plans fell through so I took a trip to the liquor store and picked up a bottle of Citrus Vodka, the clerk recognized me right away and said ?Haven?t seen you in a while?. I replied ?Yeah, I took a small vacation??I wasn?t really lying, I did take a vacation away from booze and I didn?t want to have a talk with her about moderating my booze intake as that would be awkward as hell since that is a conversation you have with people who are close to you or awesome people on the My Way Out forums?plus she probably wouldn?t give a shit.

The wife went over to her girlfriends house with the kids which gave me a nice peaceful night for a change and I got into a conversation with AL?To be continued Saturday morning.

Feeling pretty good actually, woke up with a very small headache but nothing major and nothing a couple Aleves wont destroy. I guess I am not hung over really because over the last three days of being sober my body was able to store up vitamins and nutrients. When I was drinking every day I had the worst of the worst hang overs and was due to my body being depleted of both of those. I am looking forward to tonight, got the boys coming over for some poker.

Saturday 18th 2014
During the game we had plenty to drink and I actually brought up the subject that I will be only drinking on the weekends, they were all pretty cool with it and thought it was a good idea because most of them are in the same boat as I was?got a couple of them to jump on board and moderate as well. It is a room full of alpha males and we did some good ribbing on each other to lighten the mood, hopefully the ones that said they would come on board stick with it.

After the game ended and they took off I sat back and relaxed with a few more shots of vodka and my newly acquired nickname ?Weekender?. I thought about these forums and my nickname here so I threw on the movie True Grit and had a few more drinks and went to sleep?To be continued Sunday morning.

Sunday 19th 2014
Woke up feeling lethargic, I am actually pretty excited to get on with the sober week coming up. One thing I noticed is that 3-4 hours of sober sleep is so much better than getting 10-11 hours of sleep while drinking.

I finished out today sober and we will see what happens during the week. Also had some pretty wicked cravings today, I kept telling myself that ?You are not quitting drinking, you are just not drinking today or during the week??that and plenty of ice cream seemed to help.

Another thing that seems to help is marking off on the calendar with a big X when I do not drink that day. It feels as I have to earn that big X, like a trophy for the day.

Thank any of you that follow this thread! This site has been a tremendous help!

[Alky]

TrueGrit's always updated mod thread.

Well, you invited me to look at this thread, and I did. After all the histrionics about moderating at the end of last week, it sounds like you drank all weekend. Sounds like you are off to a great start.