need a drink so fedup

[Bella]

Hi. Im 25 days sober. I need to drink today. So fed up. It looks like my husband and i are splitting. Not good when young kids r involved. Feel so selfish. Maybe i should stay together for the kids sake. Im so unhappy and im craving badly to jst get drunk and forget. Usually i drink when im stressed and i cant now. Im sitting in my car waiting to go into an aa meeting. I really dont want to go...i feel so awkward there. Im climbing the walls for a drink. Jst need to let off steam by writing this instead of going to the shop. I jst need to breathd and remember that i knew it wasnt going to be easy. There r always going to be times like this...i need to ride this craving through and then let it drop. Thats what my sonser said to me. I dont NEED to have a drink....i dont have to do that. I feel a bit better. Jusf need to breathe.
Thankyou for letting me vent off likd this. It helps. Im not great at phoning an aa friend...i rather txt or come here. Gotta go now. Thankyou. Bella xxx

[DancingGirl]

need a drink so fedup

Post here - go to aa - think of your kids. S&^% happens, but we all know that AL makes more.

You will win. As you said, ride the craving and it will leave.

:l

[vynan]

need a drink so fedup

Bella,

Stay strong...I can understand and urge is no stranger to us. Time is a healer....live today, fight tomorrow...don't drink

Vy

[Nelz]

need a drink so fedup

You are ohhhhhh so close to that 30 day mark, the one coveted by everyone. After reading your post, I think you said it best. "I dont NEED a drink" when this urge passes you will feel and be stronger

[roxane]

need a drink so fedup

glad you got it out there (here).

you know what you need to do. and that its hard. would be harder if you drink though.

[FlyAway]

need a drink so fedup

Getting through real life shit sober and actually feeling emotions is all a part of recovery. Instead of numbing yourself with booze, try to feel the emotions and hurt. Feel it in your body. Do you feel tightness in your chest? Do you have a headache? A lot of times emotions will manifest themselves in a physical way in your body. Look for the emotion, acknowledge it, and give yourself a pat on the back for staying strong.

[sunshine_gg]

need a drink so fedup

Well done for venting, Bella :l

I hope you made it to and through your AA meeting and heeded your own words: You don't need a drink! Not over this or anything else.

[Byrdlady]

need a drink so fedup

Tough times, Bella...I am so sorry for your troubles.
When life changing things happen to me and I think " Dam, I need a drink!" It dawns on me that normal people don't NEED drinks to deal with life, only Alkies....that pulls me back down to Earth where I can ride it out. It is a new way of handing problems for us, but it is a skill, like solving puzzles or ice skating...it can be learned!
I cant wait till you hit 30 days and get your hat! Be sure to post in roll call so we can all see it. Ride it out...things WILL get better. Just sort thru them. ...one at a time. Byrdie

[Bella]

need a drink so fedup

Thankyou so much. I went to the meeting wearing my mask of smiles..then someone was nice to me and i cried like an idiot. I got through most of the meeting then left and sat in my car and called my sponser. Cried again and told him how angry i am and "why can't i be like a normal person and drink"...you see..im missing my husband in a way. We still live in the same house but im alone with this mad mind of mine. No love or a hug or a nice chat. So im here talking to you and i have my sponser friend who is Amazing. Im doing ok now. No drink...have a terrible headache! Chin up bella!
All the best to u lovely people...and thankyou xxxx

[Pavati]

need a drink so fedup

Hi, Bella:

That was so strong of you to go to an AA meeting and post here when you had such a strong craving. I hang out here and copy what the long-timers do even if it doesn't seem like what I want or need. They post when they want to drink, I post when I want to drink. They check in here daily, I check in here daily. Sometimes it does feel like that false smile you describe, but eventually in typing and reading I get to the real root and find the real emotion, just like you did with your tears.

Hope you have a better day. Sorry for what you're going through.

[mama bear]

need a drink so fedup

Bella-
your post inspired me this morning and I am so sorry for what you are going through

[NomoreJim]

need a drink so fedup

Bella
a friend told me once "just keep smiling and living like your happy and soon you will be" I thought they were crazy but tried it any way. It is starting to work I'm sober and feeling happier. I had some serious marital problems as well alcohol compounded them. It's much easier to deal with it sober you can remember the converstaions and are less likely to say something you will regret later. Sounds like your on the right track though. Like you said Chin up Bella!

[K9Lover]

need a drink so fedup

I am so proud of you Bella :l

You were so strong and you got through it! I hope things get better for you. Remember, you never have to drink again, even if you want to. Stay close to us and ride out the cravings like you did last night....that's how you kick AL's ass! Way to go :h

[YouKayBee]

need a drink so fedup

Drinking alcohol never fixed anything, even for 'normal' people.

Well done you!

[A Better Me]

need a drink so fedup

:l:l:lBella. You're a strong woman.