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How did you get to 6 months AF?

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    How did you get to 6 months AF?

    Hi all,

    I'm interested in hearing from people with 6 months plus sobriety.

    I thought folks would be interested in hearing how you got there. What was that journey like? What worked for you, and what strategies did you find useful? How did you make it through 30 days, 90 days, then onto 6 months AF?

    It would be an honour and i'm sure helpful to many here, if you could share some of your journey. Thanks in advance everyone.

    (This community service brought to you by Gman inc.)

    'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

    Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

    #2
    How did you get to 6 months AF?

    Hi there G man.!!!
    Although I do know the day I last quit - I didn't obsess about milestones like 30 days, 60 days etc. I kept busy and just got on with my life but I also made sure I gave permission to myself to blob and not feel guilty about chilling out. I planned things carefully for when I knew I would be around booze so that I would not drink. My biggest battle was myself and being honest with myself as most of my problem daily drinking had been at home, alone. I couldn't change totally certain things like going to the supermarket, travelling or work or home stress so I had to learn to live with these and not use AL.
    I also kept remembering the crap from drinking, the toughness of the early days of quitting and the fact that I would probably die from an AL related illness too soon if I went back.

    As for MWO - I kept with the daily Abs thread and tried to post daily and read a lot. There was a really rough patch when I had problems at work and the support of the daily Abs people (bless their socks!) was fantastic. I am fortunate to also have a loving and supportive partner and daughter.
    We are all different in our lives - so what works for one may not work for all - and what works at one stage of our lives may not always work at another time. I certainly came to realise that moderation was not for me and I made my peace with AL - it was a battle - now something that is removed from my life. I can be in the same room as it but I just am not interested in engaging with it anymore. But I realise I must be vigilant and not complacent.

    Comment


      #3
      How did you get to 6 months AF?

      Good question, Mr. G.

      My long answer is documented in my many posts on MWO - I made a commitment to post instead of to drink and I kept it. I immersed myself in this place to the point that there was no space for serious thoughts of drinking - my world became focused on not drinking. I asked for help and received it from wonderful people here. I read MWO, blogs, books about addiction --- finally learned about the subject I'd spent years denying.

      The turning point came after a few months when I realized that my posts sounded like those by someone who was ready to be done for good and was happy about it. My brain had been changed. Relief just washed over me! The job wasn't done at that point (and in some ways never will be) but that is ok. There are ups and downs but the path to take is clear - there is no more internal bargaining and debate and false promises. I don't drink. And I won't ever again.

      Now I do what it takes each day to make sure that that goal doesn't change. For me that means being constantly aware of and grateful for even the smallest benefits of a sober life and trying to help others who have the same goal to reach it.

      I cannot imagine going back and would love to be able to help anyone who wants to be free.

      Comment


        #4
        How did you get to 6 months AF?

        Today is my 6 months. I didn't set any time goals...I did count the days for the first 5 months...my real goal was to NOT drink....the days seemed to accumulate with that goal in mind...surely not easy with life getting in the way but being able to come here and vent and gripe etc was how I coped.
        Dottie

        Newbie's Nest

        Tool Box
        ____________
        AF 9.1.2013

        Comment


          #5
          How did you get to 6 months AF?

          Thanks everyone.

          Great stuff.

          'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

          Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

          Comment


            #6
            How did you get to 6 months AF?

            Guitarista, we joined the same year, a pretty long time ago. During that time I posted mostly on the mods thread, relatively satisfied that i was drinking a lot less. I was never a daily drinker. I read an awful lot everywhere on these boards. I think the reality of how alcohol was holding back my life sank in gradually. There was a period of time that I posted with the daily abs group, but I wasn't successful in quitting for good, couldn't make it through a month. I've always thought the big question was how do you gather strength, resolve to really quit. I was finally ready after looking at too many bottles in the recycle bin. My drinking had morphed into a bottle of wine once weekly for awhile, then began encroaching on other days. Not such moderate drinking, but No DUI, no big event of any kind. I posted a daily prayer for the first month. I wavered after that, then grabbed onto that list in my signature line, that's what helped me finish the six months.

            I am adding gratitude: I don't deserve a drink for any reason. I have a great life, why would I mess it up with alcohol?
            My life is better without alcohol, since 9/1/12. My sobriety tool is the list at permalink 236 on the toolbox thread under monthly abstinance.

            Comment


              #7
              How did you get to 6 months AF?

              I wish more people would post here. I am lapping up this info and thankfully see similarities between myself who would be thrilled with myself at six months AF and those who told their brief story. I want to be YOU!! Please keep posting. We need it.
              "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
              Lao-Tzu

              Comment


                #8
                How did you get to 6 months AF?

                What a great idea for a thread Mr G!

                Ok, I did my 30 days and thought yep, under control I can mod. Did that for a bit longer and was just as miserable as when I joined. So I made a plan. Set a start date. Shovelled vitamins like there was no tomorrow. Rested when I needed to - which seemed to be all the time. Ate well. Counted days then months and then that didn't seem so important any more. Checked into my home thread morning and night and sometimes through the day. Had and still have a great pm relationship with several people that always manages to lift me. Changed habits, introducing new things, one at a time and never in a hurry.

                But the biggest thing was probably losing an attitude that I had and that I see a lot of. Its an attitude that the world owes you something, and that you're so hard done by that every hurt needs to be salved with a glass of wine. And every win celebrated the same way. Get over that attitude. And always remembered how I felt when I first typed the words "help me stop drinking" into Mrs Google. Never forget what made you come here.

                Comment


                  #9
                  How did you get to 6 months AF?

                  myhappyplace;1633631 wrote: What a great idea for a thread Mr G!

                  Ok, I did my 30 days and thought yep, under control I can mod. Did that for a bit longer and was just as miserable as when I joined. So I made a plan. Set a start date. Shovelled vitamins like there was no tomorrow. Rested when I needed to - which seemed to be all the time. Ate well. Counted days then months and then that didn't seem so important any more. Checked into my home thread morning and night and sometimes through the day. Had and still have a great pm relationship with several people that always manages to lift me. Changed habits, introducing new things, one at a time and never in a hurry.

                  But the biggest thing was probably losing an attitude that I had and that I see a lot of. Its an attitude that the world owes you something, and that you're so hard done by that every hurt needs to be salved with a glass of wine. And every win celebrated the same way. Get over that attitude. And always remembered how I felt when I first typed the words "help me stop drinking" into Mrs Google. Never forget what made you come here.
                  I knew I loved you for a good reason
                  If your 8 year old self met you, would they be proud?
                  Rejoined life 20/5/19

                  Comment


                    #10
                    How did you get to 6 months AF?

                    byebyebridgetjones;1633633 wrote: I knew I loved you for a good reason
                    Reciprocated :H now lets start a thread about Undie love...wait, we've done that :H:H

                    Comment


                      #11
                      How did you get to 6 months AF?

                      myhappyplace;1633639 wrote: Reciprocated :H now lets start a thread about Undie love...wait, we've done that :H:H
                      Get a hold of yourself woman:H
                      If your 8 year old self met you, would they be proud?
                      Rejoined life 20/5/19

                      Comment


                        #12
                        How did you get to 6 months AF?

                        Mr G I'll have an internal chat about this and report back in the morning if that's OK?
                        Should probably talk about this more often yet haven't managed to articulate it adequately yet...
                        If your 8 year old self met you, would they be proud?
                        Rejoined life 20/5/19

                        Comment


                          #13
                          How did you get to 6 months AF?

                          byebyebridgetjones;1633641 wrote: Get a hold of yourself woman:H
                          :H Yes. I will.

                          Must add here: a sense of humour is also good. This is a serious business getting your life back, take time to laugh even when you feel grim. Hang out with people who make you smile, look for simple pleasure in "stuff".

                          That.is.all. x

                          Oops, except to say, that would be good Bridge. I think this thread is such a good idea. Thank you G.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            How did you get to 6 months AF?

                            It looks like I took a different route than others. I did in fact count the days(at least at first)

                            I didnt want to try to convince myself that I would "nevereverneverneverever" drink again, because that was just too big of a challenge. So I picked out an amount of days that would get larger every time.

                            The first day, The seventh day....the monumental 30 days.....six months and a year. I felt that if I had a target to shoot at, and it was reasonable, I could gain some traction and confidence. If I shot for a year right out of the gate, that was just too long.

                            Also, the silent mantra of "I dont drink" to myself when an urge would strike. Soon enough my brain started to believe me. My silly AL brain still talks a little bit here and there, but its not as bad.
                            Living on Planet Sober since 05/02/11




                            DAREDEVIL COOKIE MONSTER

                            Comment


                              #15
                              How did you get to 6 months AF?

                              Thankyou Sunbeam, SS, Happs, Bridge and Nelz!

                              Great posts.

                              'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

                              Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

                              Comment

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