Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

[It's My Time]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Hope the 5K went well Don!
Day 7 here - this is a time I remember well from past quits (at least the handful of times I made it to day 7) - the initial energy about quitting wears off and you have to find a way to get through. This morning I thought a lot about the idea Ginger999 shared that the first week is the hardest, and yes, for sure the old habits begin to tug at you, the excuses begin ... it's like I have to step outside of myself and watch it all happening, to get some perspective on it.

Right now I struggle with, what replaces the old habits? I have plenty of interests outside of work that I could be doing, instead of sipping the evenings away - I love to read, play instruments, sewing, ride my bike, go for walks ... and of course right now, picking blackberries ha ha! But I'm pretty unsettled at the moment, trying to envision what the new habits from day to day LOOK like. I'm wondering, how did others find a way to grip (and I do mean grip) onto new daily habits when the old ones were whispering in your ears? Any perspective on this would be appreciated. IMT

[NotHappyHourHappyLife]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Blackberry Queen,

New habits to avoid all habits?
I found some domestic habits that I used to embrace, which had been shoved behind the wine bottles and neglected for many years. I used to love creating meals, and I had changed our dinner habits from home made to "quick and easy"... so now I create meals, again. I found a recipe to make home made dog food and my dogs are enjoying this new habit...

I used to iron our work shirts and had changed from weekend ironing to "Oh, no one will notice"... I've started ironing creases into dress shirts again.

I used to "enjoy" a bottle of wine every night, while watching TV with my husband... now I will have a coffee mug of ice cream as my night snack. If I feel like the alcohol genie is whispering in my ear, I will leave the family room and do something else- Take a night bath. Read a book. Watch TV in bed. :l

Patty

[Ginger999]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

It's My Time, Man that is such a good question. I started making jewelry again as I sit in the evening with hubs. When I was drinking I was too busy getting a buzz on to do anything productive. An evening walk is wonderful now that I'm not drinking. I spent A LOT of time here on the threads. I stayed logged in and kept reading and posting. If you can just get through this first part, it gets so much easier. Now it just feels normal not to drink in the evening. I do have a soda or sparkling water every night as we cook dinner together. We always sipped on wine before I quit and I didn't want to lose the together time that prepping dinner together gave us. Oh and I got into coconut milk ice cream. I'm vegan so "real" ice cream was out for me. I found the coconut milk version and fell in love. Find a treat you love and stock up on it. Don't worry about the calories right now. Treats are better than alcohol. Read sober blogs. If you go to SoberSouls blog, she has some great links to others. Saturate yourself with sober energy!!! You can do this.

[SoberSoul]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Great advice Ginger and the rest of you.. was just thinking about starting some good habits. Being in limbo here living in a tiny trailer on the construction site during the week and cooking for a crowd most weekends at the lake house it seems that I'm too unsettled to worry about much except sobriety. But with each passing day I feel stronger and more capable of adapting permanent, healthy change.

The first few days are hideous as far as the grieving for that first glass of wine that represented relaxation, sensuousness, communication; even spirituality. We feel empty without the buzz that allowed us to sink deeper in our chair, tune out the unpleasant noises of life, chat and laugh and generally let our hair down.

You know I still need that buzz. I still have to find that buzz because I want a ritual to differentiate between the end of a day and the beginning of an evening. Living in this trailer, I sometimes fret about the limitations I have in creating my replacement 'buzz'. When hubby cracks open a beer or flops down under the canvas to snatch a nap at 5pm after working all day building the house, the witching hour is still calling me. But it doesn't necessary call me to drink. It calls for a diversion or a change of some sort. I sometimes use this time to go to the river and sit for a bit. If it's cold enough I brew a pot of tea. Often I just come online to pass the time and get through the funky phase. A game of online scrabble sometimes has to suffice.

Even though I'm over 100 days sober, I have yet to recapture that nice, swaying of my mind that only a glass of red can give me. But it's just not worth it. It really isn't.

I may or may not experience that nice let down of the glass of wine but whether I do or don't won't change the fact that life, in general, is a zillion times better without booze. I would rather have a thousand disappointing witching hours than one hour spent hungover and full of self-loathing.

[It's My Time]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

First everyone, can I give a big :h to hubby for ditching the beer tonight to help me get to my first AL free weekend in ... probably forever. He's not quitting (he can actually stop after one or two), but knew I needed some help tonight. I'll just need to figure out the one-person drinking, one-person not, scene - but it seems as if some of you have figured it out. Second, I can't thank this group enough. I DO worry about calories - years of wine have added pounds - but right now not worrying about them seems sane, given what I'm trying to do. And getting up, doing SOMETHING, getting away from the alcohol genie makes a lot of sense. Finally, from SoberSoul, "Even though I'm over 100 days sober, I have yet to recapture that nice, swaying of my mind that only a glass of red can give me. But it's just not worth it. It really isn't." So it isn't that you get past the feeling - it's that you've experienced the other side and know that the life you're creating is so much more worth it. This is huge - I was wondering if I was trying to get to the holy grail of never feeling the witching hour - but it seems instead that it's a different witching hour, somewhere down the road - one that calls for a different kind of change to get through it. OK.

The day is done, and I'm headed for day eight, y'all!! Appreciatively, IMT (otherwise known as blackberry queen, ha).

[fennel]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

SoberSoul;1691989 wrote: Great advice Ginger and the rest of you.. was just thinking about starting some good habits. Being in limbo here living in a tiny trailer on the construction site during the week and cooking for a crowd most weekends at the lake house it seems that I'm too unsettled to worry about much except sobriety. But with each passing day I feel stronger and more capable of adapting permanent, healthy change.

The first few days are hideous as far as the grieving for that first glass of wine that represented relaxation, sensuousness, communication; even spirituality. We feel empty without the buzz that allowed us to sink deeper in our chair, tune out the unpleasant noises of life, chat and laugh and generally let our hair down.

You know I still need that buzz. I still have to find that buzz because I want a ritual to differentiate between the end of a day and the beginning of an evening. Living in this trailer, I sometimes fret about the limitations I have in creating my replacement 'buzz'. When hubby cracks open a beer or flops down under the canvas to snatch a nap at 5pm after working all day building the house, the witching hour is still calling me. But it doesn't necessary call me to drink. It calls for a diversion or a change of some sort. I sometimes use this time to go to the river and sit for a bit. If it's cold enough I brew a pot of tea. Often I just come online to pass the time and get through the funky phase. A game of online scrabble sometimes has to suffice.

Even though I'm over 100 days sober, I have yet to recapture that nice, swaying of my mind that only a glass of red can give me. But it's just not worth it. It really isn't.

I may or may not experience that nice let down of the glass of wine but whether I do or don't won't change the fact that life, in general, is a zillion times better without booze. I would rather have a thousand disappointing witching hours than one hour spent hungover and full of self-loathing.

SoberSoul, I am finding that getting outside really helps to settle that "urge for wine". It's good that you are so near to the river you love...I find water to be most soothing. When you are feeling challenged, sit next to the river and close your eyes and just listen- this has an almost magical effect on me.

I miss the effect of the first half hour or so of wine or beer...but I wrote myself a list of "cons" that seem to slip to the background when I am yearning for a buzz. The waking up at three a:m, feeling like crap and wondering what the heck I did to land in bed fully clothed, with a mess in the kitchen. The feeling of disgust and worst of all, terror at not remembering.

Anyway, I have been experiencing a sea change of sorts these last few weeks. For the first time, I am AF and finding peace with it. I've discovered sober blogs, yours included! You are truly inspiring. :h

[Ginger999]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Fennel, I feel the same way about sitting by water and just listening. I lived in the mountains for 15 years and when I moved to town my heart longed for the sound of the river and pine trees. That's been 20 years ago and my heart still longs for it. If I ever need a boost, that's where I head.

Hope everyone has a great AF day. Sad one here for me today but I'm going to get through it AF, if it kills me!

[fennel]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Ginger999;1692141 wrote:
Hope everyone has a great AF day. Sad one here for me today but I'm going to get through it AF, if it kills me!

I have tried reading back a bit- I hope things are okay? I also hope you don't stay sad for too long.

I can see that my list of "cons" is the same as your "playing it to the end"...it's helpful to remember not that first blush of excitement at the beginning of a drink, but the horrible stuff at the end of the night.

And yes...there is something about the outdoors that affords a peace that can't be found elsewhere. :h

[Ginger999]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Fennel, Today is the day that I have to put down my beloved little dog Ellie. She's 19 and I've kept her longer than I should to avoid the pain that this will bring. My heart is breaking..... The vet will come here at 4p today and we will bury her in a petunia patch out back. She's seen me through more trials and tribulations than any other being on this planet. I love her so very much. But.... I'm sober and I can get through this AF. :'(

[fennel]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Oh, Ginger...I am SO sorry! There is no substitution for the unconditional love we get from our fur-babies- it's a huge loss. :l I am keeping you and Ellie in my thoughts and prayers.

[Ginger999]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Thank you so much, Fen.

[Lizann]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

I was thinking of,you today Ginger! My heart breaks for you! So proud of you for doing this sober!

I had a very quiet al free weekend. Lounged in the pool, did a lot of reading and some Netflix and a movie. Can't remember the last time I was so unproductive and content! Today i made up for it! Treated myself to some shopping while I was out and about. Sadly back to work,tomorrow.

[Ginger999]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Lizann, Glad you got a nice restful day. Thank you for thinking of me.

[Chief]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

We're proud of you, Ginger.

Just remember, you gave Ellie a wonderful life and took care of her all the way to the end. That's all you can do. :l

Don

[Ginger999]

Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Thanks everyone for your kind words and thoughts on the loss of my little Ellie. She's at rest now. The hardest part now is watching Ginger (my avatar) wondering around the house looking for her Mama. Ellie raised her from a pup. Pretty sad for Ginge.

I'm gearing up for a reunion in wine country and a week on the beach. I'm feeling strong despite the loss. I went back and read through my thread called "Into the Abyss". It was my first trips AF and I was scared to death. What a difference 100 days makes on this AF journey.

If you are just starting out for the umpteenth time, stay close. It's so much better on the other side. As Don would say.....Embrace your AFness!! Love you guys!