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**NoSugar** · May 1, 2014, 01:01 AM

Looking for advice

Damo,

You said you are looking for advice. Mine is that you read this thread before you take that post-race drink: https://www.mywayout.org/community/f9...ect-78410.html.

I hope you don't drink Sunday or Monday or ever. Give your brain a chance to truly heal. 3 months is not enough time.

A drink will not improve your day - and could easily put you back to where you used to be.

I hope your race is fun and reward enough. All the best - NS

**available** · May 1, 2014, 01:38 AM

Looking for advice

Dont do it Damo. You came to mwo for a reason and that is because you are an alcoholic and for us one drink is never ever enough.

Read your signature line, it really says it all and if you do drink then that date will change.

Why are you looking forward to drinking? What pleasure did it give you in the past? Why did you give up if you enjoyed it?

Only you can decide to drink or not, I know for me it is not an option anymore.

I hope you decide what is best for you. x

**paulywogg** · May 1, 2014, 07:53 AM

Looking for advice

Damo,what if you give yourself permission to drink just the couple of days and your mind switches to "well i broke my sober streak,may as well keep on"?it's too goddamn hard to quit,i'd hate to see you go backwards

**j-vo** · May 1, 2014, 09:24 AM

Looking for advice

Damo,
Everyone here has already given great advice. You did the right thing by posting your thoughts and being honest. Now you can receive the advice you're looking for and I think you're looking for us to tell you NOT TO DRINK. You wouldn't have come here if you didn't want to be talked out of it. So here I am telling you to please think about where you started. How did you feel when you were drinking? Why did you start posting here? I bet I can answer all of those questions and more. THE DISEASE is the DISEASE OF DENIAL. Of course it's gonna come back from time to time and tell you it's ok for that celebration after the marathon! It's gonna tell you just drink Monday and Tuesday. Because it hates us and wants to see us in pain. Read your earlier posts on MWO. Were you desperate to stop drinking? You stopped. How have you felt, your physical and mental self these last three months. Spend some time reflecting on all of this. The easy part of not drinking is yet to come. We still have to deal with the ugly beast and that's why we should be here posting, just like you did. Don't give into that voice. Take the voices and advice you're getting from MWO.

**damo180** · May 1, 2014, 11:38 AM

Looking for advice

mollyka;1655865 wrote: Ok Damo -- lets see can we untangle this one

Have you thought through to the 'consequences' of drinking? All of us have different consequences -- back in Dec 2011 I hadn't had a drink since the October -- but my consequences would be (after October) the end of my 35 yr marriage - a probable permanent rift with my 4 kids - and me having to leave the family home because my husband said he wasn't going to leave ---- AND I DRANK ---- that manifested to me the cunning and baffling nature of my relationship with alcohol -- and funnily enough - it was what re-enforced completely my 'knowledge' that I was/am an alcoholic

ok - that's my story -- what's yours? What's going to happen to Damo if you drink? --- emotionally, physically - every way? Could this be your final quit - do you have another one in you? None of us know that for sure -- so an element of Russian Roulette there----- What's going to happen to Damo's family if you drink? Emotions, trust, belief in you -- etc etc??? and Damo's running that he loves? --- and on and on and on and on --- for most (read 'all' really) of us on here -- IT'S NOT A CELEBRATORY/CONSOLING DRINK -- it's allowing a toxin back into our system that we have - (and in your case I KNOW THIS -- cos you told us) with great difficulty eliminated over the last 3 months -- nothing more -- it's NOT a reward --- it's NOT the icing on the cake after your marathon -- it's a toxin -- it's an addictive toxin that can potentially ruin your life --- and you are contemplating allowing yourself to be lead by that????
You KNOW it's madness -- I knew it was madness back in Dec 2011 - but I still did it -- it culminated in me going to rehab and having to slowly re-build trust with my family -- and so much more -- but I still did it --- because I'm an alcoholic --- and I think from what you say Damo -- you know you are one too --- that's the fact -- that's why it really cannot be an 'option' --- I'm ALWAYS here Damo -- I love your honesty and your passion re. your sobriety -- pm me anytime - and d'ya'know what? You sign yourself off as 'Damo in Dublin' --- well - I'm 'Molly in Dublin' -- and it's a very small city -- you ever want to meet up for a coffee -- I'll be there --

think it through Damo -- think it through:l

Hi Moll,

Ok, to stop you nagging me, I ll start a plan for Sunday and Monday :H.
But seriously, I am overwhelmed by your kindness and advice.
You are my unofficial "sponsor"

I know what I need to do, and of course you are right about everything.
I give you my word I will stay sober this Sunday and Monday and will log on here.
The power of this site strikes again, thank you, thank you, thank you.

I will just get through this weekend and worry about my holiday closer to the time when I should be even stronger in my will to abstain.

I owe you big time Molly and hope to meet you one day to thank you in person.

Take care my friend
Damo x:thanks:

**damo180** · May 1, 2014, 11:44 AM

Looking for advice

Dear friends,

Thank you so much for your advice.
It is exactly what I needed to hear.
I will read "relapse in retrospect" now and I have taken every word you all said on board.
I know what I need to do. I WILL stay sober this weekend.

I will be forever in all your debt.

Off out now to bring the boy training.
Hope I can log back on later.

Hope you enjoy your evening

:thanks:

Damo in Dublin

**available** · May 1, 2014, 05:51 PM

Looking for advice

Thank god is all i will say Damo. We can only do this one day at a time. Do not worry about your holiday, i just had one in "alkies paradise" (thailand) with my mum who i was basically estranged from (due to my drinking al) and i had a wonderful 2 week af holiday and could have gone longer, well i have, i am home and not drinking.

Good luck friend.

**A Better Me** · May 1, 2014, 06:00 PM

Looking for advice

Good luck in the marathon Damo. And I'm so pleased to hear you're putting a plan into place for the weekend..I'm really touched by your honesty & strength.
I'll be thinking of you on Sunday & Monday, brother.

**damo180** · May 2, 2014, 12:15 AM

Looking for advice

available;1655845 wrote: Dont do it Damo. You came to mwo for a reason and that is because you are an alcoholic and for us one drink is never ever enough.

Read your signature line, it really says it all and if you do drink then that date will change.

Why are you looking forward to drinking? What pleasure did it give you in the past? Why did you give up if you enjoyed it?

Only you can decide to drink or not, I know for me it is not an option anymore.

I hope you decide what is best for you. x

Thanks Ava, I remember reading when you were about to go on holiday with your Mam and am glad you enjoyed it sober.
Hope your relationship with her is improving.
You are are an inspiration here.

Cheers
Damo x

**damo180** · May 2, 2014, 12:21 AM

Looking for advice

A Better Me;1656114 wrote: Good luck in the marathon Damo. And I'm so pleased to hear you're putting a plan into place for the weekend..I'm really touched by your honesty & strength.
I'll be thinking of you on Sunday & Monday, brother.

Thanks ABM , and hope things are good for you.

Really looking forward to marathon on Sunday (well, first 20 miles anyway :-))
Simple plan has worked for Sunday.
Booked dinner with my wife and boys , and booked somewhere where I must drive.
I am strong enough to not drink and drive now.

Have a nice day

Damo in Dublin

**scottish lass** · May 2, 2014, 10:10 AM

Looking for advice

Well done for posting before it happens, that is huge. I am a bit behind you but having some similar thoughts....I shared them on another thread, I don't intend to do anything with the thoughts, just aware they are there - I am feeling so good, and done so well in my books - so the crazy voice says cured. A response said that yep, I am cured ......unless I start again....so, I better not

Good luck!

**FlyAway** · May 2, 2014, 10:30 AM

Looking for advice

I agree with Scottish Lass; good job in posting. You wanted to drink, but in your heart you knew it was wrong. That's why you posted. Great advice from Molls too.

I always found the 4 month area to be tricky for me to navigate. Always remember how drinking was when you first came here. Nothing romantic or celebratory about it. Best to you in your marathon!

**damo180** · May 2, 2014, 01:41 PM

Looking for advice

Hi all,
Thanks again for your support, it means a lot.
So i will keep this thread going until I feel ok again.
I took my guard down and i was very close to relapsing.
And I know now Sunday will be tough because I have let it drag on.
But I am ready now to fight it.

I am thinking it through what will happen if I drink on Sunday.
Get through Sunday, which I believe I will, i should be back on track.

But it has upset me and I am going to need to work harder on my sobriety.

A long weekend here and I hope you all have a lovely one.

Damo , feeling grateful in Dublin x

**satz123** · May 2, 2014, 03:24 PM

Looking for advice

Oh WELL DONE DAMO !!!!
HOW did I miss this thread yesterday doh !!!!

Let's concentrate on our hols next ? :yay:

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