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**Bella** · May 24, 2007, 06:21 AM

Celebrating without alcohol

I know what you mean Lotus. Its like at weddings, everyone toasts the happy couple with champagne and toasting with a glass of squash doesn't quite seem right does it! I'm going to a wedding on saturday, I wonder what I willl do. I think you should toast your husbands success with a special soft drink. Love, Bella xxx

**MDBiker** · May 24, 2007, 06:27 AM

Celebrating without alcohol

I think a lot of times people don't understand or know about our problem drinking. I have found when I tell them I am an alcoholic and can't drink, they stop the badgering. For some that may be TMI. If so you will just have to stick to your guns or not go. If your hubby knows you are trying to stop and he still insist, he has no excuse. Perhaps he has a problem also.

bear

**Lotus** · May 24, 2007, 06:58 AM

Celebrating without alcohol

MDBiker
I think you hit the nail on the head there. My husband drinks most night and I have said he needs to cut down but then come the excuses. I try to support him but I know myself the more you push someone to give up the more they do it. I just find the whole idea of having a drink to celebrate ludicrous. I mean he drinks every night so how can today be a celebration drink....just another excuse ask me.

Bella
That is what I will do. Many a times I have gone out and just had coke. After all no one else knows what's in your drink.

Thanks

**Guest** · May 24, 2007, 07:41 AM

Celebrating without alcohol

People always associate celebrating with drinking; it's been ingrained for hundreds of years. You toast to a promotion, new jobs, new house, new baby, new BBQ, getting the landscaping done, everything... there is always a reason to celebrate with liquor.

I've been trying to convince myself that I am trying to become healthier and I've started exercising again. I remember the days when I used to skip the pub after work to go to the gym; how much would I love to get back to those moments.

What about a virgin ceasar? They look the real thing and taste it somewhat..plus tomatoe juice is good for you!

**Lotus** · May 24, 2007, 08:03 AM

Celebrating without alcohol

Thanks GG

I am looking through the old posts to find ideas on non-alcoholic drinks and mocktails.

BTW I've started exercising too. Joined the gym last week but very demotivated as only lost 1LB. Maybe we can motivate each other. I'm definately going tommorrow as being a Friday I don't want to be tempted to drink. After a workout I won't want to undo my hard work.

Let me know how you get.

**nancy** · May 24, 2007, 08:13 AM

Celebrating without alcohol

That's a tough situation. I don't know why people put so much pressure on others to celebrate with a drink.

Your husband is in the wrong here and I guess you just need to be strong with him.

I am temporarily AF. I think one way to get around it in some celebration situations is to ask for just half a glass if you can trust yourself! You lift the glass for the toast. Then, to others, it looks like you have already had half but you didn't really. When people come around to refill you just politely decline and leave the half glass there.

I am going to try this sometime. I don't like it when people call attention to my lack of drinking, makes me very uncomfortable.

Lotus, one pound weight loss is good. I always wanted to lose a lot quickly, but from what I am reading it's better to lose 1-2 pounds a week so you can keep it off.

**Guest** · May 24, 2007, 08:16 AM

Celebrating without alcohol

Lotus;139345 wrote: Thanks GG

I am looking through the old posts to find ideas on non-alcoholic drinks and mocktails.

BTW I've started exercising too. Joined the gym last week but very demotivated as only lost 1LB. Maybe we can motivate each other. I'm definately going tommorrow as being a Friday I don't want to be tempted to drink. After a workout I won't want to undo my hard work.

Let me know how you get.

Sure thing! My lift here is broken so I had to carry my baby girl in her stroller up and down two flights of winding staircases.. with her milk and diapers in the bottom on the way up. I am thankful I don't live any higher now. Once I start seeing results I get hooked. If you want to see them right away, start working on your legs. That's the first place you will tell any difference. That will help the drive to start. The more muscle mass you have, the better. I should have been a trainer..I think I may when I get home. I might look into that, as I hate the job I have if I ever have to go back to it.

**Lotus** · May 24, 2007, 08:28 AM

Celebrating without alcohol

I'm terrible I find I can't even walk up 3 flights of stairs at work. I take the lift!!! By the time I get to the 3rd floor I am gasping for breath.

**Breez** · May 24, 2007, 11:12 AM

Celebrating without alcohol

I had a 1st Communion this past Saturday afternoon & the wine was flowing freely for the ladies. I thought to myself because the week before we had my daughter's & did not offer alcohol (just beer for the gents who asked because it was 12 in the afternoon & only lasted 2 hrs after). But I watched these ladies at my sister in law's thinking "why the hell do you need 3 glasses of wine at 1:00 and then have a cup of coffee after?". Just because you are in a celebratory atmosphere you need to drink? It was a Communion for goodness sake. I was happy with my Diet Coke-no calories, no headaches.

Then they went on talking about Happy Hour and how people drink way too much and that Happy Hour ought to be a one drink thing. My phony in laws are hypocrits.

Stick to your guns. The more AF days you have the stronger you will feel in social situations. Congrats on 4!

**paula** · May 24, 2007, 11:20 AM

Celebrating without alcohol

Hi Lotus; I understand exactly how you feel. If I'm in the situation you describe, I just say
I don't like the taste, or that I'm on antibiotics.
Paula.

**Popeye** · May 24, 2007, 01:58 PM

Celebrating without alcohol

Hi Lotus,
MD Biker said it for me.
I don't think it matters how close you are to someone, They can't feel what you feel all the time. Also, a lot of people can't ee why anyone might not wish to drink....for any reason. That is their problem, not yours.

**hart** · May 24, 2007, 02:45 PM

Celebrating without alcohol

(((Lotus))

I admire your determination in not drinking. Four days is great! What I have been doing when I go out.......especially since I NEVER passed up drinks...LOL, is tell people I am on a rx that I can't drink with, which is true, I shouldn't drink w/Campral.

People seem to respect that too!

**Arial** · May 24, 2007, 03:10 PM

Celebrating without alcohol

Dear Lotus,

Good for you for sticking to your guns - I gave in to pressure just to toast someone's birthday and although I stopped after a couple, it was a couple more than I wanted to drink. I'd been AF for a few weeks and proud of it and then to make them feel more comfortable I compromised my own feelings - so well done for keeping to your own decision - I certainly have done so since then and feel much more in control because of it - it's them with the problem, not me!

It is interesting how uncomfortable not drinking makes others feel. I find it doesn't bother me being around people who drink, but it bothers them that I don't. Even though I've made it very clear that just because I'm not drinking I don't expect them not to aswell, it seems to make them apologetic, and yes, I really think it makes them more aware of their own drinking which I know is under question with a few of them! I now have a couple of different responses to different situations which I reel off and I find people respect my decision.

So many congratulations on your AF days and on your determination - I really applaud your strength of mind that has enabled you to make your own decisions and not give in to pressure. :goodjob: !

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