What comes next.....?

[Softy]

Sort of followed the one day at a time mantra and on 6th September will have completed a full year without alcohol for the first time since I was in my mid teens over 30 years ago.

I have Enjoyed the year off and I achieved a lot fitness wise and felt mentally strong.

I never ever envisaged giving up for ever and I am thinking that the 12 month mark is sort of a point I can relax the strict regime.

How do you ever know if you can control it and go back to enjoying a beer once in a while without rolling a double one on the dice, falling down the big snake and landing back on square one?

[Sunbeam]

What comes next.....?

Most people regret that choice to enjoy a beer once in awhile. For some, there is an immediate binge. For me, it happened gradually, but I did go back to drinking a whole bottle of wine some days, at least once a week. That's way less than some people here, but still too much: not healthy, not in control of my life. I am much happier now without alcohol, nearly two years. Alcohol improved nothing in my life. Nothing.

[JackieClaire]

What comes next.....?

You don't unless you try..................right that was the simple answer...........so lets get serious.

Ask yourself some questions?

Will it be special occasions, birthdays, Chrimbo..........just a couple Friday night?
When you last had a block of AF time how long before you were necking a swift one before you got home?
How long before you were hiding the drinking?
Will you apply rules...............only 2 drinks, no spirits, only wine with meals (meaning a glass not a bottle)..........after all rules are made to be broken.
Do you like yourself as a non-drinker.

And finally why would you want to go back to drinking at all?

A year is a year and it is fantastic but its not going to make us into normal (whatever normal is) drinkers any more than 10 years will.

[Starfish1]

What comes next.....?

What comes next?

Softy;1695793 wrote: Sort of followed the one day at a time mantra and on 6th September will have completed a full year without alcohol for the first time since I was in my mid teens over 30 years ago.

I have Enjoyed the year off and I achieved a lot fitness wise and felt mentally strong.

I never ever envisaged giving up for ever and I am thinking that the 12 month mark is sort of a point I can relax the strict regime.

How do you ever know if you can control it and go back to enjoying a beer once in a while without rolling a double one on the dice, falling down the big snake and landing back on square one?

Softy, Square one comes next, if you drink that beer. Believe me! I know! Please don't do it. You have done so well. Protect your quit. It is worth more than gold.

[Starfish1]

What comes next.....?

Softy,

Take a peak at the Relapse in Retrospect Thread. I bumped it up for you.

[Softy]

What comes next.....?

Thanks all

I appreciate the advice and support

Big thinking to be done and to be honest I am enjoying not drinking so much I will probably stay this way for the time being.

I still can't bring myself to say that's it forever but at the same time whilst I don't need it don't do it seems the simple choice

I have a 10km race at the end of Sept so there is at least one goal to take me way past the year mark

Thinking about the new me running 150km per month, losing two stone, sleeping well, and not feeling guilty but feeling proud of myself - it is easy to see the benefits.

:thanks::l:h

[satz123]

What comes next.....?

Softy;1695818 wrote: I appreciate the advice and support

to be honest I am enjoying not drinking so much I will probably stay this way for the time being.


Thinking about the new me running 150km per month, losing two stone, sleeping well, and not feeling guilty but feeling proud of myself - it is easy to see the benefits.

But you are answering your own questions Softy - I don't understand ?
Why are you wanting to go back to:

• Not having the energy to run 150k a month
• Putting on 2 stone
• Feeling guiltyNot SleepingNot feeling proud of yourself

????

[Softy]

What comes next.....?

I know

Spatz I know what you are saying and I agree - I suppose it is still inside me to think I am a drinker - one year off after thirty isn't enough to erase what has become my DNA.

Conscious abstinence has to be the way forward

Truth is every now and again I need a third party view to point these things out

It means a lot to me to have good gentlefolk at MWO to help me see sense

[spiritwolf333]

What comes next.....?

Softy;1695793 wrote: Sort of followed the one day at a time mantra and on 6th September will have completed a full year without alcohol for the first time since I was in my mid teens over 30 years ago.

I have Enjoyed the year off and I achieved a lot fitness wise and felt mentally strong.

I never ever envisaged giving up for ever and I am thinking that the 12 month mark is sort of a point I can relax the strict regime.

How do you ever know if you can control it and go back to enjoying a beer once in a while without rolling a double one on the dice, falling down the big snake and landing back on square one?

Hey Softy -I think you know the answer. But thank you for the awesome reminder!!!

[Byrdlady]

What comes next.....?

Softy, you've been around about the same amount of time as I have. I went back and grabbed this post from 2/1/11.

Taking it easy

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Have felt so low for the last three months I have had to double my dose of ADs. Going to see the doc about it tomorrow. Weirdly just four days off the sauce and I feel ten times better. Been an eye opener. I ruined Christmas for everyone due to what they thought was genuine depression. My guilty secret is it was alcohol causing the low mood. I owe them all a big favor and I can repay that by finding myself again. I used to be nice. Progressive alcoholism soon stopped that! Onwards and upwards and strength to you all. End Quote.


In your 5 years on this site...have you EVER heard of anyone picking up 'a beer' and being GLAD they did? Haven't you seen thread after thread of how AL destroyed people's lives? Sounds like it was destroying yours, too, if the above post is an indicator. I would encourage you to seek out many of the links that NoSugar has posted about the addicted brain. Actually, I think they are in the Tool Box....I'm afraid this disease we have is NOT cured by 'time off for good behavior'. Those pathways in your brain KNOW when they get a fix! If you think about it logically, what has changed in a year? More knowledge? More self awareness? None of these things matter when you are an alcoholic. In fact, rational thinking has nothing to do with it, we all knew we should not drink and we drank anyway. Addiction defies logic.

When you open that door to AL just a little, you will be amazed at how you can start rationalizing it again. But play it out completely....it's not going to be ONE beer, one day, may not even be one year....some people fall and never manage to get back up. Don't be a statistic. The odds are grossly against you (in fact, I don't know a SINGLE success story). Don't fall into the mass of people who just drink themselves to an early grave...don't let AL be the thing that takes you down!

There are 7 years worth of stories on this site if you take the time to research it. Guard your quit as if your life depended on it.....because it does. All the best, Byrdie

[Sunbeam]

What comes next.....?

Softy, I think it was great that you posted your question here. Perhaps you expected the answers you are hearing. You seem to be listening, I am proud of you. We will all have days that " just a drink" will call out to us. I hope you are gathering strength to just say, " no thanks" .

[Softy]

What comes next.....?

Thanks all - great support as ever - I am greedy taking this from you but it helps

[frances]

What comes next.....?

Hi Softy - I've been around here since 2008. Quit a couple/few times for long periods (never a year, but a couple of months) and then thought I could moderate. Each time, I got back to the old habits that brought me here. I am now at nearly 6 months and don't want to get in that situation again! You need to remind yourself why you came here in the first place and is it worth that significant risk (almost certainty) of going back there? I also have a problem with saying forever and I am taking this one day at a time. I may take it one day at a time for the rest of my life and that's fine with me.

All the best I am so glad you posted and are thinking this through.

[paulywogg]

What comes next.....?

Man,i'd kill for a year sober,why mess with a good thing?

[NoSugar]

What comes next.....?

It occurred to me that I probably could "get away with it", but why?

Number one, it is a known poison. I go to great lengths to be healthy in many ways, including not taking medications that are hard on my liver, kidneys, mental clarity, etc. so why would I drink a drug known to affect negatively every organ system now that I no longer am addicted to it and (wrongly) think that I "need" it?

Number two, there is no way to know who among us could occasionally drink without starting the cycle all over again. The odds of any one of us being that person are very low and I'm not interested in taking the chance.

I really don't see any benefit for me (or anyone else for that matter) to taking a drink.

I hope you decide not to risk the good self-image, confidence, and peace that you've earned for undefined and uncertain benefits.

All the best, NS