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**MonaCat** · June 3, 2007, 05:50 PM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

LOL's Happier at this story. Your hubby is quick witted.
Humm...I am going to have to think about this one. It's been awhile since my kids were young and innocent.
But, I'll be checking this thread, and am sure it will be funny.

**Flip** · June 3, 2007, 06:35 PM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

Just after I got rid of my ex, my then 6 year old found my vibrator in my bed.... of course she wanted to know what it was. I told her it was a massager and proceded to demonstrate how it was used by rubbing it over her back and neck.

A couple of days later, I'd completely forgotten the incident (pissed again) when walks out with it when I have some friends over. She says "look at mummy's massager" see how it works? bbbbbbbzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Dear god, the humiliation!

**Guest** · June 3, 2007, 06:39 PM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

When my daughter was born I was the first of all my friends to have children and the last of all my ex-husbands friends to have children so she got all the attention for a few years...my girlfriend finally had a baby when Brit was about 3...we went out to dinner and someone stopped to ohhhhh and ahhhh the NEW baby....Brit sat at the other end of the table and kept hollering "what about me, what about me" It was so funny.....

**buffy** · June 3, 2007, 07:35 PM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

My daughter watched The Wizard of Oz so many times when she was young, when someone asked her her name she would tell them Dorthy Gale...from Kansas...and she called me Stepmother in public, I guess from Cinderella. I got some weird looks in the grocery store when this would happen.

**MDBiker** · June 3, 2007, 08:04 PM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

We went to get in the hot tub this weekend and my granson asked why i had "fuzz" all over me. But then fuzz could be manly.

**Flip** · June 3, 2007, 08:21 PM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

AS long as it isn't mould MD!!!

**Prest4time** · June 3, 2007, 09:15 PM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

My last one is not shy at all... so many things he said to make me want to move to another city. But a few of my favs are these.

When he was two-and-a-half approx, and I was just about done potty training, I was changing I think the LAST diaper I ever did. He was lying on the den floor and my husband was out of town. (Now just a side blip here... we have "code" names for certain body parts and with good reason). So I'm like doing the "wet wipe" thing and praying its the last diaper I ever change and he's just smiling at me and says, "I know where Daddy's Po-Po is." I said, Yeah?? He goes, "Yep. Its riding in the front seat of his car."

Another Po-Po story. About the same age that he was, I was getting out of the shower one morning. He's in and out of the bathroom and at that age, they dont notice much as long as issues are not made about anything. So all the sudden, he says, "Where's your Po-Po?" I said... "Ummm, Mommies dont have Po-Po's!" He said, "What's wrong? You dont want to wear yours today?"

Okay, I've said enough!

**imatree** · June 3, 2007, 09:36 PM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

A Target story...
I have very small breasts, and for several years I didn't wear a bra. So my daughter, about 3 at the time, is sitting in the shopping cart as we're wheeling past the lingerie section in Target. She reaches her hand out and grabs a big cupped bra off a rack, holds it up high and says - quite loudly (because she's never seen one) - "Momma, WHAT'S THIS???"

**Happier** · June 3, 2007, 09:40 PM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

All of your stories are funny and Mona your story must have been so good that your hair fell off your cat.

I have 2 good ones from the same child. When my son was about 3, I was at a kiosk at the mall looking at sunglasses and my son kept saying he had to go to the bathroom. I said, ok just a minute. A little bit later, the gentleman that was helping me was asking me, "Is that your son?" I said, "Oh my god." Here he was peeing in the water fountain and his pants were down to his ankles. I said, he has never done this before and the man was laughing so hard and he said that he has never seen that before. I'm sure he is telling this same story to people too.

When this same son was about 4, I took him through a nice department store and there were these 2 mannequins side by side. He came up to them and said, "Hello ladies, let's see if you're wearing any panties today." Then he went and looked up their dresses. I busted out laughing but these older ladies did not find it very funny. Hey, he is just like his father. He learned the name panty from his dad. What 4 year old uses that word?
Kids will be kids.
My son's turned out to be very nice gentlemen!

**julie001** · June 3, 2007, 09:58 PM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

A long time ago when we were just kids, my family went to the outdoor movie theater. My brother was probably about three. The movie was a dud...Anyway a little while into the movie my brother blurts out, Could you please change the channel!" Probably not that funny, but back then we were all rolling with laughter.

Julie

**irishlady** · June 4, 2007, 03:01 AM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

I was in the supermarket with my daughter who was about six at the time, money was really tight back then and I picked up a pack of butter to have a look at the price, she suddenly says in a loud voice, mum, why are you looking at the butter, its not Christmas yet... Oh the humiliation...

**soccermom** · June 4, 2007, 05:56 AM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

I don't go to the mall--ever. Well, one Christmas I decided to take my kids to show them the decorations. My daughter, who was probably 5 at the time was is awe and says, "Mom, this is the most beautiful Wal-mart I've ever seen."

**Cinders** · June 4, 2007, 06:10 AM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

My son got me!!

Once, when my son was 5 and my daughter was 3, one of our lamps got broken. My husband and I were asking the kids who broke the lamp and neither child would 'fess up.

So, pulling out the old ammo my mom used to use, I said "Well, God knows who broke the lamp."

My son looked me straight in the eye and said, "Yes, but He's not going to tell you!!"

My husband I knew at that precise moment that raising this one would be hard, and it has been. However, he turned out great and has two wonderful boys of his own that keep him on his toes now. :-)

**Guest** · June 4, 2007, 08:40 AM

Children Do or Say The Darnest Things

This just happened last week, I had picked up my Grandson and was running late getting back to pick my dog up at the groomers. I was loosing it in traffic (my town decided to close down to pave on Memorial Day weekend) I kept hitting red light after red light. ARRGGHH! I exclaimed, he said "MamaNan what's wrong?. I just keep getting red lights and I need to get moving I said. He began, with hazel eyes wide to say" MamaNan God and Jesus put thoses lights there to keep you safe, so you won't be in a accident." Who knew God was a city planner?. Also just a day later he told me he thought it was time for him to get his own place. He's 5!! So precious
Smiles
Mar

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