One Step at a time - April 2015

[NoraC]

Quick check in. Dottie.... Big hugs. You are an amazing woman.

K9 - is this from your move? I'm so sorry

[NoraC]

I don't have a good connection here. How is everyone doing?

[paulywogg]

Does antabuse make people tired? Sorry about the ribs K9,hi Nora,Rusty,Dots, I'm having a shitty attitude day for no reason! TTFP thank goodness, but feel exhausted from it,or maybe I was already exhausted

[Rusty]

Pauly, I take a 1/4 tab of Antabuse if I even THINK I might THINK I might THINK about drinking...and as a person who got a horrible reaction from Clinique alcohol-based products while taking 1 AB, I think 1/4 of tab will be fine for you...because I did not get sleepy at all. I took the AB with the food and I was fine. How are ya, darling? Not feeling strong today. TALK TO ME.

Hi Nora, how is it going as a juror?

[Rusty]

Pauly sweetheart---maybe you were tired already. Take a 1/4 tab and it will do the trick. No kidding. For two days after even a 1/4 tab, you CANNOT drink. Sending loving thoughts all the way to Sinful Vegas. :-)

[Lizann]

Hubby's birthday today. Dinner, walk, cake celebrate day two. Have a good night my loves.

[paulywogg]

Rusty, just a yucky mood for some reason, these past few days, I REFUSE to get back into the pit of drinking! I popped the antabuse out of desperation to avoid al at all costs, no craving just wanted to escape my mood/head cripes,I always get this way a few weeks into being sober, I always blame pms,period just ended, blame the full moon,that's over, I guess it's just me,dammit

[mama bear]

I am hone from a very long day and am tired, 3 people gave notice today so I am not in a great mood. Rusty, I am glad you had a happy easter.
Gonna eat and flop

[Lizann]

Sorry everyone is having a tough day. Sending hugs your way!!! Let's head out to the blanket fort guys, this time I'm bringing cheese cake! Hope you all have a good nights sleep, tomorrow is another day:hug:

[mama bear]

present and accounted for in blankie fort!!

[sunshinedaisies]

On my way too ..... and bringing Cadbury Eggs (again) .....

[Rusty]

Mama-sorry to hear about the 3 people quitting! :-(

Pauly-great job on popping the AB!

Lizz---enjoy husband's b-day party today!

Nora-thanks for popping in.

K9-broken ribs are sooooo painful. Try not to cough...and sneezing....owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!

Dottie-I was awake quite a bit last night, trying to come up with a reason your dh is not with you anymore and here are some thoughts I had. I hope I do not appear to be harsh or critical. Forgive me in advance, please.:hug: I've thought about something you said a good while ago, when you were new to the thread....I didn't post then but I did read. you mentioned that your dh was 17 years older than you were...that you were about 40 when you met. He he had two kids, but at your age, you didn't have many options as far as a husband, and it was too late for you to have children, so you just had to put up with his kids. Your post had to do with the actions of his daughter and you were sick of him always taking her side, even though she was a manipulative person and she was giving you fits. Maybe God's plan was for you to be able to enjoy the rest of your life, doing what YOU want to do, without having the burden of his kids in your life. A red flag for me was that you have only mentioned them ONCE since he passed away. I was shocked that when someone here asked about them you said you would just meet them at the funeral home. Maybe the next stage of your life will be doing things you've always wanted to do, but couldn't because he didn't want to do them and since he was so much older than you, maybe he would have been extremely limited as far as activities. I know you said you saved so you two could enjoy retirement, etc., but what if he had had a stroke, like my friend's husband? Her husband was a real jock, and they did everything together...they were so in love. Then, at the age of 65, he had a stroke, and his brain has been reduced to that of a 10-year-old. My friend no longer has a strong partner; she is tending to a small child who pitches fits and isolates himself in his room all day. Maybe God was saving you from a permanent, miserable situation like that. Or another thought I had...maybe one of his kids would get them in a situation where they would have had to move in with you and dh...imagine the strain that would cause on your relationship? One thing that helped me when I broke off my long-term relationship was that I made a list of all the things I could now that I was no longer in this relationship...rather than to focus on things that I could not do as a single person. I was also glad to be done with his 5 grown children from his first marriage. Talk about 5 underachievers. He used to brag about his middle son being the smartest of all his kids (I thought to myself, that kid is such a loser...and he's the smartest? Oh, now that is scary!!!!) Well, that middle son has been jobless for a few years now and moved in with his father. I smirked in delight because I knew that "smart" kid would never amount to anything, and I was right!!!

Don't even think about the thought of another relationship right now. Wayyyyyyy too soon.

Well, Dots, I hope I have helped. Dr. Rusty unfortunately has to be a with a new client all day and won't be holding free office hours. Hahahah. Hope you have a tolerable day.xoxox

Hope you all have a great day!

Rusty

[Dottie Belle]

I go to see the financial guy today. It seems I have to re invest hubbs IRA or pay taxes on it so one more thing to do. Still dont have the paperwork on the RV from probate. What a major pain. RV season will be over before I get the thing in my name. We thought it was OK the way it was titled but oh noooooo, So I wait and wait.....
Raining and gloomy which doesn't help my mood at all but I did sleep a little better last night.
Grief group tonight and that is a good group of folks. But I think maybe I am proceeding a little farther but that is me. I know hubbs would not want me to give up or give in to a life of nothing but sitting here watching TV....I cant imagine that either. I am trying new things and trying to get out. NOT how I saw my life at all but what choice do I have???

Rusty very interesting take on things. His kids were brats in the beginning but they were adults so I didnt have to have much to do with them. I think his whole family thought I was his mid life crisis wife and it wouldnt last..fooled them...
They will inherit whatever is left but I do intend to have some fun and maybe travel but I need to find a group to do that with. I was never one to travel alone. I hated business trips when I was alone.....boohiss...
Yes he was 16 years older and he was in very good shape physically and would do most anything I could if he wanted to. Yes doing what I want when I want has some appeal but being here alone is strange too. I have no clue about any other relationships I wasn't looking for one when I met him so I think that is the best approach.

[Lizann]

Interesting rusty. You are very wise.
So where is everybody today?

[Lizann]

Dr. Rusty, I like that! Dottie, I'm glad you have a meeting to look forward to tonight.
Mama, are you ok? You seemed a little down yesterday and I didn't see you check in today.
K 9 oh my, how did you break your ribs? I here it's very painful.
Sunny, did you buy those Cadbury eggs on clearance? What am I thinking, they never go on sale.
Waiting for my people to come home. We are taking hubby out to dinner. Meanwhile I'm eating everything in sight
Hope you guys are all doing ok, I'll check back in later if it's not too late.