One Step at a Time - August 2015

[NoraC]

Hi there Idaho.....how are you doing?

[Dottie Belle]

((((Mama))))

[fennel]

Hey there - so........

Hubby's sister & BIL are going to be down here next weekend. They'll be about an hour away. My BIL's Mom lives down south from us and they are going to come visit for her birthday. Well, hubby and I decided to get a hotel down (it's really close to the beach) there so we could just have a fun night away from everything. We'll visit with them during the day and then spend the evening at our hotel.

Well - we were talking and looking at rooms. Hubby said that maybe he would even get a beer. (He used to drink to excess but stopped several years ago. I didn't even drink when we got together. ). He very occasionally will have a beer (once or twice a year). Anyway, I immediately felt panicky. I started thinking about my days sober and that I didn't want to drink. What was I going to do?!?

I thought about it for an hour and I just told hubby that it was ok for him to have a beer but I wasn't going to. He immediately said that he wasn't either and he apologized for having brought it up. I told him again that he could. But, he has said he won't.
I have been thinking that I'm going to start taking AB. Make sure that it's in my system and I won't end up drinking if we go out to dinner with them. I am trying to do this without AB and have been doing well. But, I don't know that I'm up for that challenge yet.

Thanks for letting me vent........

Nora, I really feel your pain. As you know, Mrs. Fen had strict guidelines on my consumption (0%), but was pretty loose on what she could consume, especially on vacation. I felt it was completely unfair. I am so glad that hubs will forgo the beer. You really don't need that. As an alcoholic, I can safely say that it really irked me when Mrs. Fen would indulge and expect me to be perfectly A-okay with it. Our spouses need to abstain, too.

[fennel]

I had a really good talk with my sponsor tonight. I read Bill W's story in the big book tonight.
I have p.t. for shoulder issues in the morning, but will hit a noon AA meeting after. I will sign up for classes at the local community college in order to make myself relevant in the work force.

I hope you all have a wonderful evening.

[NoraC]

Thinking of you, Fen. :hug:

[Lizann]

Aww mama, sending hugs your way. I am glad that you work bud was there for you. Nana being in the hospital now too, that is just too much to all at once. Hope this week is a better one.
Fen, I agree our spouses do need to be supportive. Thankfully hubby rarely drinks. Good for you for going back to school.
Just a regular Monday for me. I'll check back later, have a good one.

[Dottie Belle]

Morning all
Gym later then laundry.
Went for a long motorcycle ride with Jerry yesterday. Then we made dinner together. I am drawn to him like a moth to a flame. I dont get it but am just going to enjoy it for now.
Paul is very nice but he cant even take a vacation for a year or retire for at least 6 so that is not really what I want. sigh....
fen so sorry about things.
mama hope you have a less stressful week
Hi Nora and Liz
Pauly where are you??
Back later

[paulywogg]

Mama,its good to see you, sorry about all the stress though, hi Shades how are you?feelingbetter today but still rresidual muscle pain,I'm kinda torn on what spouses should do,if the table was turned and hubs was a the alkie and I was in control, I would quit completely for him,but on the other hand I don't know if he should abstain if I'm the one with the problem, gosh,that's a toughie! I guess I just don't think about it much,I barely notice when he drinks,it doesn't tempt me like that,my relapses have all been shit mood related or euphoric recall related,have Mondayitis not bad but still,much love to all,see ya after werk

[NoraC]

Hello all -

Well, I just took an AB. I think it's all for the best. I know that I'll be around drinking this weekend if we go out to eat. If I need a little help to keep me strong right now, then I'm gong to use it. Just another tool to keep me AF.

Pauly - glad that you are feeling some better. Don't work too hard today.


Dotts - you don't need to make any decisions. You just need to enjoy yourself. :hug:

I've got to get back to work. Just wanted to check in. Have a great day everyone!!!

[blue1]

Hi guys!
Have a successful Monday!

[SKendall]

Hello all.

Hugs being sent to Mama, Pauly, Fen. Lizz, you are doing well and how long is your son in Switzerland for?

Nora, you are rocking' this.

Happy New week to everyone.

[fennel]

Mama, I missed your post somehow! Sorry things are so stressful, but I'm glad you had a good cry. I find that to be helpful. <3

Pauly, I guess to clarify I should say that in early sobriety, I believe our spouses should be supportive. I wouldn't expect a normal drinker to abstain for the entire relationship...just the early days when things are so hard.

Sorry about Paul, Dottie...I wouldn't rule him out completely, though. As for Jerry, remember...it's easy to have physical attraction. Make sure there's a mental and emotional compatibility with him, too. Ha! I can't believe I'm handing out love advice!

Good for you on taking the AB, Nora...:hug:

Hi, Blue! Hi, SKendall!

[fennel]

I've been perusing courses for the local community college. I was thinking that Medical Coding might be a good job for me...but I looked at the website and got discouraged. The course is designed to last for 32 weeks. 0% of grads were able to complete the course in that time frame and 64% found employment in that field. I wanted the stats to be a bit higher. I guess I'll keep on sleuthing.

Worked out and took mom mall walking. Going to make supper for my sister wives.

If anybody has any ideas of courses that won't take too long to complete, don't require me taking care of people and will provide me a half way decent living, chime in with your thoughts!

I went to a meeting today and felt I didn't have a lot to offer advice wise. My sponsor told me I looked tense during the meeting, and I laughed. I'd been studiously trying to not jiggle my leg continuously, like I always do when I'm seated for a long period of time. I'm a fairly hyper person and it's a nervous habit. Here I thought I was being so "quiet" and controlled- and I ended up looking tense. :egad:

[paulywogg]

Fen,my daughters bf's mom has done medical coding for years and she makes bank!!gets to work from home,however it took her years to build the business up to where it is,I too am looking for something to further educate myself but I don't know what I feel like I won't have time for a real degree and I don't want to do a vocational course,I'm stuck, but looking

[Nursie]

Hi Guys, checking in. I miss all of you.
I'm done with radiation treatment now. I am making a commitment to myself that I am living a healthier life now. That means exercise, diet, and of course no drinking.
I don't know why the no drinking part is so stupidly ridiculously hard. I quit a million times and a million times I have "changed my mind".
I survived stage 3 cancer. I can survive and flourish at being sober!