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As you all know my Mama is very ill, this week it was affirmed that she is terminally ill. We have NOT given up hope and are still going through with chemo and going to fight, but I have called my Granny (80 yrs. old this month.. my Mama is her baby) and my family, etc.. Have invited everyone to come in SHIFTS to see Mama if they would like to before she is so ill from chemo and in intervals. I am working, have children...blah blah blah. I can not believe some of these freakin people!!! My 80yr old Granny whom lives off social security is buying her own ticket here for 1,000.00 and will be here next week...because Mama is her baby and she is getting here as fast as humanly possible. My brother doesn't know when he can come because he hasn't enough money!!!! Makes 65,000.00...and I offered to pay 1/2 the darn ticket to get him here...he is my Mama's baby and only son. Sister calls my Mama (who lays in bed in pain most of the time...which by the way I have not spoken to in 4 years, but bit my lip, called and told her what the doctor said and was very nice and offered to let her come here...she is not welcome in my home...long story, but I told her she needed to come see her Mama) and ASKS MY MAMA TO BARROW THE MONEY TO COME SEE HER...WHAT???? You are going to barrow money from someone that is dying? That is a sure way to get a loan you never have to pay back...now you know why I don't speak to her...I was livid. I just said " Mama, we will not be doing that.", and left it at that. She has medicine and doctor bills. I am still AF, but this week has been REAL hard...hardest I have had since the beginning. AND of course, everyone asks how I am doing when they talk to Mama, so I guess they are just waiting for me to fall off the wagon and get run slap over by it which just makes me more determined to be the stubborn ol' mull pulling it............................Tags: None
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Family
Dear Luv -
I have a screwy family too. Just focus on doing what you can for your Mama. Don't let the crap from your siblings taint what may (though hopefully not) be your final time with her. They have their stuff, that's about them. Your Mama needs them of course, but you can't make any difference there, they'll do what they do. She needs what will be given, and you're doing that... know that. Continue to give her all the love, respect and appreciation you have in your heart.
(If this following message is premature I apologize!!) I'm so glad you all are not giving up and still going for chemo. IF however, the prognosis turns, I highly recommend Hospice. They were ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL when my mom was nearing her last days, also with my brother who died of liver disease a couple years ago. They'll make sure your dear one is comfortable, getting drugs to relieve any and all pain, hospital bed in the home, whatever... things a doctor won't do.... and they grant a great relief to the family members who are present and need to be still functioning in their own homes.
Kudos to you for sticking to your AF! Best wishes to your Granny, and I send healing love to your Mama.Hugs,
imatree
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Family
I'm totally speachless about your siblings ! This is sooo sad... Who you are as a person and who your Mama is will shine right through all this crap that is trying to fly your way... We are all here for you and your family sending up prayers for your Mamas comfort.
Hugs and Love Niblet :l
~ I hear a whinny on the wind~
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Luv, I saw my mama through her cancer and was with her when she passed on to eternal life on April 16, 1989, I was 19 years old and it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I am the youngest in my family and was the only one taking care of her through the months she struggled.
We were the closest durning that time that we had ever been. We shared everything we could in those 31/2 months. I got to have that and I still cherrish that time with her to this day.......almost 20 years later.
Luv, cherrish your time with her. If they can't be here, it's all yours.
:h :h :h :h
Rachele:h :h :h :h
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Family
Luv, Again I had it to you and say I have all the respect in the world for you. This is such a tuff time and you are handling it beautifully. Right before my mom in law died two years ago we witnessd her going through the steps of preparing her place in the after life. She seemed to be going through the motions of sewing and putting things in compartments while she laid there in bed. We read that you shouldn't stop them from doing this, but this is how their mind prepares itself to peacefully accept death. And she did die peacefully when the time came. That helped us to deal with it better as well.
As for your family, well enjoy your granny and let the others fend for themselves as much as possible while you look after you and your mama. That's what is important now. You have the rest or your lifetime (or not) to make up with them.
MelissaIf I ruin my body where will I live? :ranger
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Oh Luv-
the "SEE..even with the drinking problem "I am still the good one"" made me smile.
Stay strong-you're doing great. Your mama is seeing the new side of you & I'm sure she is proud.
Prayers are still for you & your mama.:flower: Change a life; make someone feel important. ................. ........................ ..................... ........................ ................. ....... sigpic
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My Mama has always told me that even as a small child when she was said I could make her laugh, so when I see sadness in her face lately I make and extra effort to try to make her smile. She came here last year in July to help me cope after losing Billy. When we found out she had cancer we were crying and she said " I was supposed to be here taking care of you"... I said "well, Mama...you know, good help is hard to find.." We both cracked up laughing. We cry, but we always end in laughter.
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My thoughts and prayers will be with you Luv. You are so darn strong.
I know all about wacky family. Mine aren't too bad but when we were trying to schedule a party to celebrate my parents' lives (lost them both last summer) nobody could change their vacation, miss a football game, etc. It was unbelievable.
Hang in there. You are doing GREAT!
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