Balmy Army November 1st

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

Morning ladies.

I obsessed on Why, Mary. Turns out its because I regularly drank an addictive substance that I had the capacity to become addicted to. Almost everyone who tries meth or heroin will become addicted so no one asks why the person who took it did. Plus, everyone knows meth and heroin are terrible, illegal drugs that no one should take. Those drugs are the problem. Alcohol is dicier - it is legal, people like it and don't want to give it up, and not everyone is wired to become addicted to it. But for us, it's really no different --- alcohol is the problem. The tricky thing about identifying the point of addiction is that you're probably past it by the time you think to ask if you've got a problem. Thank goodness we're done with all that, right???

How true, sometimes maybe there is no deeper reason why some alkies drink than its such an addictive substance to certain people. I am sure if I started taking drugs I would become hooked on them too. As Mary says 'It just is and probably always has been.'

[roxane]

being exposed to a circle that drank/drinks alcoholically and growing up not knowing that its not normal. it is a culture to some. no surprise that some of those people with that kind of exposure will become alcoholic. but. does it matter why? too late after all to wonder. how to cope/live without it is the more important problem. to me at least.

[Tabbers (a.k.a. KTAB)]

Indeed Roxy.

As a kid I grew up thinking that drinking heavily was the norm with the adults around me and that everyone did it. I think it blinded me to the dangers tbh and gave me the attitude as I became a young man that if you didn't drink there was something amiss, sad really.

[IamMary]

Good Morning Army..

Indeed Roxy.

As a kid I grew up thinking that drinking heavily was the norm with the adults around me and that everyone did it. I think it blinded me to the dangers tbh and gave me the attitude as I became a young man that if you didn't drink there was something amiss, sad really.

being exposed to a circle that drank/drinks alcoholically and growing up not knowing that its not normal. it is a culture to some. no surprise that some of those people with that kind of exposure will become alcoholic. but. does it matter why? too late after all to wonder. how to cope/live without it is the more important problem. to me at least.

Well that’s what had me thinking about it Roxy and Tabbers, although I wasn’t exposed to drink as a kid.
Until late 20s, it was non-stop boozing, so it wasn’t obvious to me that I had a problem, because if I did, so did EVERYONE else. It wasn’t until people started to settle down that I had to fend for myself.
Mind altering drugs, lots of those, but I didn’t like to lose control, which is why the evening glasses of wine, when all I have to do is walk up the stairs, became so attractive.

Pink cloud Starty – Im probably with Glitzy too.. it was gradual, ups and downs. Feeling more confident these days, but Im sure wobbles will come!

[JackieClaire]

And its a very 'respectable' addiction.......unless you end up with your back side hanging out of you pants and on the streets.............

This has been bothering me for days...............its a company Not on the Highstreet.............get the catalogue every year and I know some people will think these are fun fun fun and a great laugh for someone who 'likes' their drink................it made me a bit uncomfortable.

[IamMary]

No Roxy - its doesnt matter at such, as long a I accept that it is - but my head needs to have some reason, some logic behind it, just helps for me thats all.

[IamMary]

Agree JC. Its the culture that if anyone can cash in on it, they will.
I just threw out a fridge magnet: you know your Irish when if your not drinking, you must be on antibiotics.

[roxane]

i get that mary, i am the sort who needs to know why for a lot of things. child says to mum 'whys the sky blue?' mum, 'because it is'. some questions dont have an easy answer or that answer doesnt make a difference to the outcome.

i know though that i drink/drank to cover social phobia/self esteem issues, my background showed me drinking was the answer to that. ultimately though, it was because i was prone to addiction that it became a problem to me and not others. sometimes finding the solution is more important than the whys of it. though learning the whys can certainly help in not repeating history.

[roxane]

its funny to people who dont have a problem. its permission to those that are starting to have a problem. maybe? not funny either way.

[JackieClaire]

Thanks,loves. I thought I might have been over prickly.

[NoSugar]

Made me shudder, JC. When I started drinking wine out of 4oz juice glasses it was an attempt to limit the quantity but I also hoped people would think I was enjoying my late afternoon grape juice :wink:. By the time I moved on to (unlabeled!) 12oz ceramic coffee mugs, I was no longer fooling myself and who knows what others knew or suspected.

I desperately looked for a "reason", thinking that it would help me forgive myself and move on. But all the things about me that are often attributed to addicts (perfectionism, people pleasing, some codependency) are also found in so many people who are exposed (often regularly) but don't become addicted. I spent months learning everything I could about addiction, trying to understand how it happened to me but not to friends who drank as much or more. The short(ish) position statements linked here sum up much of it. The main thing for me was, even before I realized it, I had stumbled on a tool that quickly, easily, and affordably mitigated all stress. Why not get a hit of that everyday??? Everyone's does... Red wine is good for you... Yada yada yada.... It worked so well until it started being the cause of unbearable stress.

Now I'm with you, Rox. None of us will know for sure what happened, why, and if we could have prevented it. Maybe we were and maybe weren't "responsible". But once we know what we all know now, I think it is our responsibility to ourselves and those around us not to drink again.

[starty]

I think many more people have a problem than actually admit it and put it down to being gregarious, sociable, its the norm etc.....

For me, I think I always feel I should be doing something, saying something or generally more sociable than I really am. Plus the buzz of mind altering substances is just because I am not comfortable being me I guess

[GlitzyB]

Evening army. Don't like those cups/mugs either even if I was drinking they would not be something I would buy they are tacky rather than jokey.

[JackieClaire]

I've got go huddle down with the dog as she's having a dicky fit because of the fireworks even though she's had her pills.

As I've met a good few of the Army lot and I know we're a gentle and funny lot..........I've often wondered what we would be like if we'd met each other on a boozy night out in Dublin.

And Glitzy, they may be tacky but they're certainly not cheap £48..........67Euros..........$73.............plu s postage.

[GlitzyB]

Jeepers that's pricy they look like something you buy in euro store or pound world they do not look worth anything like that price. Ahh poor Bess fireworks are awful stressful for animal I always feel so sad for stays out there they must be terrified.