Day 1 , again

[big bad mo]

Hi , really wanna stop drinking but can't, simple, been going to AA for years on and off, been to rehab but left after 2 weeks, been to community addictions, tried Baclofen, Campral, my health is really suffering, i used to be a daily drinker (bottle of vodka) but now i drink for couple of days and am really ill , stop for a night and promise the earth then after 1, 2 days max nothing else matters except getting a drink. any excuse , I've worked hard and deserve it, I enjoy a drink, i will stop tomorrow any excuse to justify drinking. I convince myself i am getting away with it even though i know numerous people who have died from drink. Any help would be appreciated .

[abcowboy]

Hey Mo! First off, yes you can!! It's your AV trying to convince you that you can't, he wants to keep his grip on you. But you can do it, many of us have and you can join us. This is a great place for help and support, lots of people who have been where you are and managed to change their life around! Why not join us? Just start with today, the next 24 hours, read, post, read! There are many threads here with all kinds of topics, whichever you chose, you'll be accepted for who you are. Welcome to Day 1, lets make it the last one you have to go through.

[lizker]

Hi Mo and welcome to MWO. I know well, too well where you are right now. I have been there. Daily binge drunk for over a decade. For seven years I drank everyday single day...it got so bad I was drinking every day before going to work. I didn't care whether anyone could smell it...of course they could and knew I had a problem by my appearance and behavior and how they avoided me. My journey started 2 years ago. My first sober day though the most terrifying, was also the most liberating day. When I finally came to agreement with my high power that I can live without alcohol, and was willing to do everything possible to stop drinking, things started to shift. It has been the toughest 2 years but the best years of my life. I have had two relapses, but I have clinged to this path. Iam almost done with month 5, can't wait to start my 6th month. Long story short, if I can be sober for over a day, ANY ONE can. You can do this. We all have it in us. Set a quit date. Gradually taper with beer to that date. Join a gym. Stock up on nutritious foods, eat like a professional athlete or dietitian, you will be amazed at how powerful nutrition is. 90% of cravings are due to deficiencies. You will be healing your body, mind and Spirit. Stay close to us here and learn how others have overcome or fighting this disease. Just don't give up.

[briseus]

Hey Mo, I've been where you are. I think everyone has that are on here. I never thought I could stop drinking but am at 95 days so far. Or something like that.
I know it's hard to get out of this viscous cycle of drinking. But all you have to do is make it through day 1. Quitting is easy. Staying quit is the hard part. I am sure you have heard that before.
Just buckle down and say you are NOT drinking today. That's all that you have to do. Don't think long term. Or you will set yourself up for failure. Just think of right this moment. That u won't drink.
It's important to set up a plan as well. Like Lizker said, gym, good food, etc. although be gentle to yourself the first few days. That's important.
And there are a tonne of helpful people here. So stick close. Go to the newbies nest too. There are a lot of people here that are going through what you are going through or have already gone through it.

You can do this. Just believe in yourself.

[Choices]

I put quitting off too. The days just keep coming and I just kept procrastinating it. I'm almost 30 days now, and my thinking has changed. Now I feel like I deserve to be healthy because I've worked hard to get sober. You'll be amazed at how well you'll feel after some time. Detoxing was tough, I won't lie.. But it's worth it. Good luck to you and all the best.

[Eloise]

You know I wish I could say 'lookie here... do A,B,C and you will be fine.'
Lord if it were just that easy.
You are the only one who can make this happen big bad mo. All the AA, therapy, lockdown units in the world cannot stop you from drinking until you decide 'i am done drinking.'
I don't envy where you are right now, it is a terrible place to be. One of the things we do is put things in our way... 'impossible to stop unless I move houses... impossible to stop until I move to Jupiter... Impossible to stop if I am going to continue to pay my mortgage ... Impossible to stop if I continue to do this job... impossible to get a new job and stop drinking... Yet, it really is all possible.

You gotta decide dude. What is it you really want?

[Eloise]

And I think if it takes 40 day ones then so be it. This takes practice.