~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

[Rava]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

Good morning. Big Al, your deep thoughts are welcome on this forum. Thats what we are here for to support each other in the good and bad. I have had those thoughts as well so I get it. Just keep moving, one foot in front of the other. Fake it until you make it!!! You have come so far since your first post. We have all accomplished so much. Even with a slip we seem to come back. A slip might be bad but if you don’t count day 1’s a slip is not so terrible considering all the sober days we have racked up. I do not want to beat myself up anymore. Right now I feel like I’m on a good course, but never too sure because I have slipped. So today I continue on my sober path and ask for 24 more please and thank you. I DO NOT want to live like I did in the past with alcohol flowing each and every day…. No thank you.

[Quit wining]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

Another 24 hours please & thank you.

Big Al, your family is better with you in their lives, the Cafe is better because you’re here. You’ve been through a lot since the accident. Time will help heal the physical injuries plus you’re getting al out of your system. Hang in there Big Al!

The hospital protesters seem to have settled down a bit and in most cities are no longer blocking hospital entrances. Police presence at these protests is just one more cost to be paid for by us all. I wonder if the protesters should picket in front of government offices, you know, the places where decisions about treating Covid are actually made. Maybe then those in health care wouldn’t be disheartened by these protests. Maybe patients going for treatment wouldn’t be subjected to this nonsense. Just a thought.
Ginger, we’re averaging about 80% unvaccinated people in hospital. Our ICU beds are near capacity and there has been talk of patients having to be moved to other facilities. And what I find scary, discussions have been held to prepare for triage procedures. Doctors should not have to decide who will and who won’t be treated.
As many of you know, we have universal health care in Canada. I read a suggestion yesterday that perhaps unvaccinated people should have their health coverage suspended should they refuse the vaccine. Interesting thought. Might be a better incentive than a lottery or cash “reward”.

Back to the audiologist today. I’m going to try a hearing aid in my other ear to see if that helps. Hey, if nothing else, because these hearing aids have Bluetooth, I’ll be able to listen to music in stereo!

Have a great af Wednesday everyone.

QW

[Ginger999]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

BigAl, some times getting those feelings out, helps wash them away. Never feel like you can't talk to us here. We've all been on the dark side one way or the other.

I listened to NPR yesterday talking about stick or carrot with regard to getting the vaccine. The carrot (incentives) helped a little, maybe it's time for the stick!

Had a really rough pain day yesterday. I pushed through and got everything done I had on my list. I paid for it last night and still this morning. Counting my blessings though! And asking for another 24 AF hours.

[BigAl]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

I appreciate the thoughts and hugs. I have been off the sauce for a while now, what I am dealing with is the aftermath. I am normally a fairly positive thinker, but I find myself looking around at the world and wondering how I let it get so out of control. Every once in a while I end up rolling around in my own self pity and my thoughts plunge. Jude, I am seeing a therapist once a week just to get things sorted out. In fact, I see her this evening. So, anyway, I again apologize for letting that moment of pity and self-loathing climb into my posts. I don't have room for that in my life, but the brain goes where it wants to at times.

[dill]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

I think perhaps we have all at one time or another posted something which we regretted, but that's part of posting on a forum. The only thing that really bothers me is when someone directs their negative feelings onto others with angry, mean posts. There were some dark times on the forum several years back when many members actually left because of nasty trolls! But self pity and dark thoughts, well that comes with the territory and I think we all know the feelings... BigAl, we're glad you are here!

Cowboy we are certainly glad you are here as well!! You may not have built this cafe, but you sure have been it's mainstay for a very long time!

I made a batch of hot pepper jelly this morning and after that I decided I needed to make an apple crisp to celebrate! Come have some with me, I'll get the ice cream out!

24 more please and thank you.

[techie]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

Good morning Cafe friends and All in need of a hug. We have your back [MENTION=24510]BigAl[/MENTION]. You know that is your ego talking. Not your entire operating system. Listen, I’ve been there. I would typically get some sober days in, and then immerse myself in self loathing to create an excuse to drink. I did this repeatedly from November ‘09 till my wake up call, April ‘10. I’m happy you recognize it for what it is. I did read your message last night. Self forgiveness is often needed when we go to that dark place. When this happened to me, I would say, “ I forgive myself for judging myself as not worthy, or unlovable, or a failure, etc. Another tool is to create an ideal scene. On a sheet of paper, write I Am…(create the scenes you want to see manifest. These things work. It is doing the work that is critical in creating lasting change.

So, with a deep sense of loving gratitude for all my family here, I accept another 24. I wish you all the best day possible. If your day is not looking like your best, flip the fricking switch and make it so. Blessings x

[BigAl]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

I need to register my sincere appreciation for this group of people and the support that is provided. I'll be honest, I'm a rather burly guy who tends to suppress my emotions but I shed a tear (ok, I cried like a baby) as I read through the responses. I'm sorry for my darkness, but [MENTION=11089]techie[/MENTION] I forgive myself. It is a part of this quit, and if I need to go to the depths then that is fine, as long as I come back out the other side. But I really mean it, I can't tell you how much it means to me that there are people who care. I appreciate it more that I can put into words. Ugh, alcohol free for another day.

[Jude58]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

Good morning to all of my friends in the cafe!
[MENTION=24510]BigAl[/MENTION], so glad that you are feeling better, and no need to apologize for expressing what you were feeling at the time. The journey to an alcohol free life can be like riding a rollercoaster from hell, and there are times when it feels like the car will fly off the tracks without a moment's notice. My advice is to hang on tight!
[MENTION=20929]Ginger999[/MENTION], sure hope that your pain is better today!


Humbly asking for myself and others that we have another 24 hours of freedom.

[abcowboy]

5:57am in Alberta, 24 more please, and thanks...

In the last 24 hours, these people have signed in for 24 hours of wellness:
[MENTION=24080]Jude58[/MENTION] [MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION] [MENTION=24196]Rava[/MENTION] [MENTION=22409]Quit wining[/MENTION] [MENTION=20929]Ginger999[/MENTION] [MENTION=24510]BigAl[/MENTION] [MENTION=7944]dill[/MENTION] [MENTION=11089]techie[/MENTION] abcowboy

Today is going to be a darn good day not to drink!

[Rava]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

Good morning Cafe. Dill, I hope you saved me some apple crisp. My favorite. Hope everyone has a great day. We are headed out to lunch with friends. No alcohol for me. Another please and thank you.

[Quit wining]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

Another 24 hours please & thank you.

A cool, fall like day here. I love this time of year! Apple crisp is another reason to love harvest time. Dill, I’ve got my cutlery packed.

Most mornings when I walk, I meet our son the butcher walking to work. Nice way to start the day having a visit.

The new hearing aid is taking some getting used to. Sadly the tinnitus is still there but I love listening to music in stereo and the sound is surprisingly good.

Have a great af Thursday everyone.

QW

[BigAl]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

QW, I have been battling tinnitus for years now. Oddly enough, back when I was in college I went to bed one night and woke up with tinnitus the next morning, and my ear has not stopped ringing since. To me, it is like a super high pitch sound, I describe it to my wife in this way: have you ever entered a room and just "known" that the TV was on? I'm not talking about the sound of the program, I am talking about the pure electrical "whine" of the device. This is what my tinnitus sounds like and it is constant. Most times I don't notice it until someone brings it up or I read something about it and then it is front and center.

My doc told me that it was probably stress induced. I was a double major and taking 24 hours my junior and senior year, my audiologist believes the stress was the cause. Anyway, I know where you are coming from and it is no fun.

Apple crisp on the other hand, that sounds like something I will make for dessert tonight.....

[Ginger999]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

I LOVE YOU GUYS! Just needed to say that this morning. You are all so inspiring.

Awwww. Tinnitus! BigAl, yours sounds exactly like mine. Like you, I can ignore it most of the time but at night I use a sound machine to cover it up.

Yesterday my chiropractor fired me. She said no more adjustments until I see a neurologist. She thinks something is going on that adjustments could make worse. I applaud her integrity.

I wish we could all meet up and enjoy your apple crisp, Dill. I'd love that!

Hope we all have an inspirational AF day! 24 more for me!

[techie]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

**Admin has deleted the Quote**

Go Away, bottom feeder!!!

[techie]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

Good morning Cafe friends and apple crisp lovers. I also suffer from tinnitus. I use a sound machine at night, listening to the soothing sound of ocean waves. I generally ignore the sounds in my head but once you lock in, OMG. Off for a long run. I must mention, that I have been avoiding riding the bike as my recent labs are concerning. It might be the cancer coming back. I have an appointment with Stanford Oncology mid October. While riding the bike should only be a concern 48-72 hours prior to a blood draw, I wonder if it is a contributing factor!? The medical jury is out on this issue. In the meantime, I will adhere to my policy of worry less, live more. So, with undaunted gratitude I accept another twenty four. I wish you all the best day possible. Remember, as the great Joseph Campbell said, “The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are.” Blessings x