~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

[Marylou123]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

Checking in for 24 more please.

Really good conversations and comments in the cafe today.

LC - thanks for the great quote. It's so true. And then that person or circumstance has control over us. I really think forgiveness is key to breaking that bond. Ironically maybe, that is always in our own control. Certainly easier said than done though. Personally, I fall into Wildflower's camp of turning it over to God, but I'm still young in that journey. I do know forgiving the offense is relatively easy compared to not feeling offended. That doesn't "just happen". And, at least for me, the longer I stay offended, the bigger the shit pile of resentment grows. Making it even harder to forgive. Ugh...it's vicious.

Time for the final cuppa the day - that'll be a decaf. Wishing a wonderful next 24 to all.
ML

LOL: I got the answer to final jeopardy wrong tonight and the category was Potent Potables!!

[empyr3al]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

[MENTION=16893]Wildflowers[/MENTION], I wrote out my feelings of AA in the quick reply and its about 1000-2000 words long. Turns out I won't post it and it was more about resolving my internal issues with AA. I don't want to damage another persons experience. I will take out some pieces that are more interesting without the opinions and what I saw happening.

History - I was raised like that already in a Christian private school. I don't want someone more disfunctional than me working step 4 be my guide or sponsor. I've had problems with sponsors before. I have enough PTSD from childhood and religious dogma. Modern Christianity is quite interesting actually and in some ways aligns with my beliefs and spirituality as I approach situations and people. It seems to be more psychological. I was raised by my mother while she was in univeristy for her masters in social work and with university style language and psychoanalysis between the ages of 12-19. Believe me there are things you don't want to be taught because you never forget them when taught during the mental development years of your life. Having your mother talk to you like a peer about her topics in university for her masters is pretty strange for a developing brain. Leaves me with some strange abilities and an incredibly abstract way in approaching people/accessing situations already at this point and to most unless you know me well I am pretty cryptic in conversation if we delve into personality traits and disorders. I think I drank over the skills for a long time because I wanted them gone so I could be normal and not see what I can see. So AA is not for me as I grow impatient with people. Potential defect of character I need to resolve !!!

Social in relation to addiction - Yes if you can keep it social. I like trading knowledge with people and skills and insights and the odd laugh. Once in a while the mirror being shown back at me by some people you've disclosed highly sensitive parts of yourself to compare and contrast behaviours. Where is that paper. This is interesting. Its called the Johari Window. Something I got in a rehab which is mind blowing. Johari window - Wikipedia. My interests are not in finding a belief as mine is well established. I'm interested in psychology and pharmacology, so outside the circle after the meeting the rules change. So yes having coffee after is nice. I prefer the CBT/DBT aftercare and consider it the best asset because you actually have discussion just like group rehab setting, one person does talk at a time but its insights from and for peers. Its not in any order like a circle. Sometimes I liked being first in AA discussion meetings to set the model, sometimes second to last so I can listen (at which time I forget what I was going to talk about!).

To summarize, I'm intellectual and spiritual but people would not understand my spirituality as there is no real description for it and it would be lost with words. And language and assumptions and selection of words is only interpreted by the others experiences so its misunderstood and frivolous to explain.

Take this test, its kind of enlightening. Its called True Colors. I am Green primary, Gold secondary and every six months I take it Blue and Orange tend to swap around depending whats been on my mind. True Colors Intl. | Personality Assessment Training – Workshops, Keynote, Professional Development & Color Cards. Odd, they are charging money. There are free ones. Or you use a template from pintrest or Google "free true colors test".

If you want to spend more time. This 144 questions.
Myers-Briggs MTBI/Jung Types personality tests. Jung Preference Exploration Personality Test
Another synopsis of what it means. ESTP - Jung Type Descriptions

I am ENFJ most of the time, but refreshing the page a couple times it swaps the last letter sometimes. Not sure it matches the last time I did it was during a weird time in my life. Should retake it but lots to do! I think I'm probably more INTP during the last half year. The therapist that gave it to me as homework cannot determine if I am extroverted (E) or introverted (I) as I am outspoken, but very introspective and do in depth self analysis of what I am thinking and feeling. (mental, state of mind check ins).

Enjoy your 24! I will too. Lots to do tomorrow.

[Mr Vervill]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

24 more for for all of us, please.

[lifechange]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

"We succeed in enterprises which demand the positive qualities we possess, but we excel in those which can also make use of our defects."- Alexis de Tocqueville

I like to think that if I let loose of struggling with my "defects" (procrastination!, insecurity, the need to control, etc.) that they can offer a chance for further learning and development.. and I guess I can pull out a few instances where that has been true.. "meaningful opportunities for growth and mature action".

Yesterday was a good day and today is also going well.. for that I am definitely grateful.
Here's to 24 AF hours for all of us.
xx

[paulywogg]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

5:12 am in Vegas another 24 please

[ssd858]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

24 please.

[abcowboy]

6:45am in Alberta, another 24 for me please, and thanks...

In the past 24 hours, these people have signed in for 24 hours of sobriety:
[MENTION=15430]lifechange[/MENTION] [MENTION=17632]Mr Vervill[/MENTION] [MENTION=23850]empyr3al[/MENTION] [MENTION=7944]dill[/MENTION] [MENTION=16893]Wildflowers[/MENTION] [MENTION=9531]catch22[/MENTION] [MENTION=20527]Marylou123[/MENTION] abcowboy

I'm thinking we could all use our defects in a beneficial way LC. For me, anger is probably my biggest one, although it's a way lot better now! I try and turn my anger into determination, not get angrier but try to make things right, or at least try not to let things get worse. It all comes back to "let go and let God"

Great to see you back Pauly! You get things put back into perspective?

One more thing this morning... for a certain member....

[dill]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

Looks like a late check in for me. Looks like my procrastination may've paid off bc thanks to [MENTION=21602]abcowboy[/MENTION] it looks like I won't have to be cooking tonight! LOL! It's gonna' be one of those "breakfast for dinner" nights! Looks delish! Thank you.:welldone:

Another thought provoking quote, [MENTION=15430]lifechange[/MENTION]. But, I really don't like taking a hard look at my defects. That's one of my defects I do believe!

24 more, please. Thank you.

[catch22]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

I never thought I had any defects until I did my steps :happy2: now am aware of my short commings. What I find that help me a lot is the serenity prayer. I have a serenity journal, I write down the things I can't control and why, And the courage if I can change it , and what I have learn from the wisdom from it. It helps me a lot to see am not always in control over everything in my life and to let it go.

Enjoy reading everyone's post

Another 24 from me ☺

[lifechange]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

Ha Dill! Your post cracked me up.. Procrastination is one of my worst.. yesterday I somehow convinced myself (forced!) to do a couple of the things I've been putting off for more than a week. I told myself I could just go slowly (I had to ride my bike across the city to get there) and enjoy the little journey. In the end it took a little more than an hour to do it and I felt good from the ride. I'm not quite sure about that defect. It seems to me procrastination might be one to try and un/re-learn.?

Catch, I love the idea of a Serenety Journal! I'm keeping a daily gratitudes journal which is therapeutic and fun.. thanks for the idea!

Wildflowers, what a beautiful and thoughtful post.. thank you for taking the time to write!

Hugs to all of you lovelies and I hope everyone has an "easy" or at least manageable day.. Nice to see you back Pauly!
I'll be back with a quote after work..

[Wildflowers]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

Only 1.5 hrs to go AF in this 24. I want to comment on a few posts, but am to tired. Briefly. [MENTION=23850]empyr3al[/MENTION] - thank you for your lovely post. My oldest daughter would like the links to personality and color tests. She will have a masters next spring in Industrial-Organizational Psychology. Will talk more later hopefully on your post. Have taken similar ones in past. Read everyone earlier, but no time.

Yes [MENTION=7944]dill[/MENTION] made me laugh to LC. Her humor is wonderful!... Enjoy everyone!... :smile:

[MENTION=9531]catch22[/MENTION] - I have plenty of defects to. Being aware of them and changing them is helpful for this alkie. Would like to discuss more later on this topic. My youngest girl gave me a serenity prayer stand cross. Its on top of TV. Also went to a class yrs bk. We all have them. Sometimes they are positive.

[MENTION=22857]Neo[/MENTION] - Hope you check in when you get a chance. Thinking of you!.. Wondering how it's going and whats on the menu. All most ran to store for salmon. Hopefully, tom. Need some ideas . Maybe celery, gorbonzo and tuna salad. Could add radishes as well.


[MENTION=15430]lifechange[/MENTION] - Your a go getter girl!... Great work on your bike ride! Your also a sweetheart!... Enjoy you and everyone here!.. :hug: back. Yes. It was lovely to see [MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION] back this AM. She's really lovely and a very caring person!... She will prevail!... :love:

[MENTION=20527]Marylou123[/MENTION] - Your comment on Jeopardy made me laugh. Think I do better with Wheel of Fortune. Always feel special if I get a few correct answers on Jeopardy. Lol Absolutely forgiveness is key!!!... It's not easy sometimes. I'll try to comment more on this. Feel it's God's grace that's helped me with this. My parents (mainly Dad) and hubs were the most difficult to forgive. So often I went back to drinking with those thoughts. Think I'm finally believing in who I am.


Sleep well and have a good day to our friends across the pond. :fairy:

[dill]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

Thanks for all the wonderful chatter here in the café, [MENTION=16893]Wildflowers[/MENTION], [MENTION=15430]lifechange[/MENTION] and [MENTION=9531]catch22[/MENTION]. Thanks to all who check in and make the commitment and give a greeting. Starts my day off with a smile and something to think about!

24 more please, and thank you!

[paulywogg]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

5:21 in Vegas another 24 please

[abcowboy]

6:35am in Alberta, I'll join this band of merry people in another 24 AF hours please, and thanks..

In the past 24 hours, these people have signed in for 24 hours of sobriety:
[MENTION=17632]Mr Vervill[/MENTION] [MENTION=15430]lifechange[/MENTION] [MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION] [MENTION=22385]ssd858[/MENTION] [MENTION=7944]dill[/MENTION] [MENTION=9531]catch22[/MENTION] [MENTION=16893]Wildflowers[/MENTION] abcowboy

I'm with you dill, brings a smile to my face to read the comments from everyone each morning!

[lifechange]

Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

"Happiness is more an endowment and not an acquisition. It depends more upon temperament and disposition than environment."- John J. Ingalls

Another one I'm working on!:happy2: How do I choose to respond to situations/exchanges in life? How do I choose to perceive life? My work right now is to pay close attention to how I'm feeling, my automatic physical reactions to situations/people.. then stopping (if I'm feeling bad)
before outwardly reacting to observe what's really going on. And usually I can manage to turn it around by looking from a different perspective.. I was happy to be able to do it yesterday as I talked to my ex on the phone.. it nagged at me for awhile and still isn't completely gone. But I didn't let it get out of control and ruin MY day/evening/next day.. I'm the one who usually gets hurt (or at least gets hurt as well) by my knee jerk, "negative" actions..

I'm happy to be excited about 24 more AF hours!
Hugs to you all..