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    Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

    Love that quote and so true.

    Got a text from my ex-daughter-in-law saying my nine year old granddaughter wont stay at my son's any more because of his drinking. She is his world and I'm so afraid he will do something even more stupid than his daily drinking. I'm trying to get hold of him and I've let his older brother know but he's not returning my calls. I bring this to you all looking for some advice on how to handle this. I'm hoping this is his bottom and he'll seek help. I don't want to do or say anything that might interfere with that. If it were you, how would you handle this? Thanks....

    I'll take another 24, please and thank you.
    Last edited by Ginger999; November 18, 2019, 08:05 AM.

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      Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

      5:47 am in Vegas another 24 Ginger I'm sorry to hear that have you talked to him about it in the past? The hardest part of all this is the person has to want to stop more than they want to drink, hopefully he'll wake up and hopefully someone here has some words of wisdom and can help
      I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

      I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
      Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

      Comment


        Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

        Originally posted by paulywogg View Post
        5:47 am in Vegas another 24 Ginger I'm sorry to hear that have you talked to him about it in the past? The hardest part of all this is the person has to want to stop more than they want to drink, hopefully he'll wake up and hopefully someone here has some words of wisdom and can help
        Yes, I've tried many times in the past he wasn't ready to hear it though. I'm hoping this is his bottom and will get the help he needs. I just want to be ready if he were to reach out for help. I'd point him here, I think. He went through treatment in his early 20s but it was forced due to a dui so didn't take. He's progressed from there. :~(
        Last edited by Ginger999; November 18, 2019, 08:59 AM.

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          Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

          I didn’t realize that you had a son dealing with this too, Ginger! We all seem to have family members who struggle too. I’m glad you let your other son know, and hopefully he can help support his brother through these consequences, especially if he lives nearby. It may just be the wake-up call that he needs. Maybe supervised visits can be worked out for now, so he still stays in good contact with his daughter?

          I read on my vitamin A toxicity site yesterday that the benefits of supplementing with magnesium are a reduction in what people call “low blood sugar” episodes and in joint pain & stiffness —my two main symptoms! I have also learned that applying magnesium in the morning can make one sleepy, and that I haven’t been using near enough. So I sprayed a lot on at bedtime last night and slept like a baby!
          I figure whatever ways we can find to stay comfortable & balanced will keep us from wanting to reach for the bottle, so I’m happy to have this in my toolbox now! And maybe it could help others of you too.

          Asking for another sober day today, for all of us.
          Last edited by Slo; November 18, 2019, 09:50 AM.
          Once a pickle, never a cucumber again.

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            Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

            Another 24 hours please & thank you.

            Ginger, sorry you’re having to deal with major family issues all because of alcohol. I don’t have a solution but I believe the comment that a person has to want to stop more than they want to drink. If you can bring him here, great. I don’t think he’d find a more supportive, non-judgemental group anywhere.
            My son the chef drinks more than he should and I worry about how his health is being impacted. He knows about MWO but I don’t think he’s checked it out yet.

            Sunny and mild here again today. Ginger, I’m sure glad I only have to watch out for mice when walking Jessie!

            Have a great af Monday everyone.

            QW
            AF since 26-02-19 NF since 04-83
            F*ck PD, cancer, dementia & covid-19

            24/7/365

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              Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

              That's super bad news for you to be dealing with Ginger. What is your relationship with the ex-DIL like? Do you think her actions are justified? I think it's important for your son to come to the realization for himself that he needs to change. If your gdaughter is his world, then the thought of losing contact with her may be the wake up call he needs. But if he feels like his ex is blowing things out of proportion then he may not appreciate the seriousness of his situation. If they have a custody agreement then she may have to tell him she is going to go to court to make an official change. That would bring everything to a whole new level and not a pleasant one. That threat alone may make your son take a realistic look at his drinking. I really feel for you! Do you live close by your son? Can you just go and sit with him for awhile and listen to his perspective or is that not possible? You obviously can't tell an adult child what to do. But you can listen and be supportive. Wish I had more to offer!

              Oh, I just remembered, you are not probably near them as you are down south for awhile.
              Last edited by dill; November 18, 2019, 11:40 AM.
              Dill

              Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

              If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

              Comment


                Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

                Ginger, I’m sorry about your son. That must cause you a lot of stress. I don’t have any words of wisdom but I think Dill had some good advice for you. Yesterday I had my kids over for dinner and after they left I drank. I am feeling guilty and ashamed of myself. I KNOW I can do better. I could blame it on retirement, exhaustion, being fearful of my new situation. But the bottom line is that I did it. I don’t want to do that again and that’s why I came right back. I want to be sober more than I want to drink. I once again realized that I can not drink a moderate amount. So I am back here with my tail between my legs wanting to stay a part of this group. I am humbly asking for 24 hours please.

                Comment


                  Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

                  Thank you everyone. My son has been in contact with both his brothers so I know he's okay for now. It wasn't my ex-daughter-in-law but his 9 year old daughter that said she wouldn't go back. The ex is just carrying out her daughter's wishes. I hate alcohol! I'm hoping he's doing some soul searching. When we are in our home state we all live within 20 minutes or less of each other. I just happen to be 1,200 miles away until April. However, if I'm needed at home I'll take the first flight home!

                  Rava, I'm sorry about the slip. You are in a major transition right now. You did the right thing coming right back. You know what you want so you'll get there. It's always a new day!

                  Comment


                    Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

                    I hope that things are better for your son Ginger. I'm sorry that it is to this point but hopefully knowing how it is affecting his daughter will be what he needs to find his way out. :hug:

                    Hello everyone. :checkin:
                    Last edited by NoraC; November 18, 2019, 07:51 PM.
                    "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
                    ..........
                    AF - 7-27-15

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                      Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...



                      I'm pressed for time. Have to be at the coffee shop in one hour. Let's all stay positive and have another 24.
                      Dill

                      Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

                      If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

                      Comment


                        Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

                        Good Morning and thanks for the post Dill. I could use that one today. I’m up early and feeling good today. Definitely not wanting to repeat that stupid mistake. I can’t dwell on the number of sober days and fact that I almost made it to one year. When compared to how I used to be I have come a long way and will continue to live my sober life the best way that I can. Hope everyone has a good day and I will take another 24 please and thanks.

                        Comment


                          Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

                          Geez....lots of stuff going on around here! [MENTION=20929]Ginger999[/MENTION]... I'm so sorry to hear about your son. As others here have said, it really needs to be his decision to stop drinking. I know that I used to get very defensive if someone mentioned that I had a problem with alcohol. Deep down I knew that they were right, but the thought of quitting the booze terrified me! Hopefully the fear of losing his daughter will overcome the fear of quitting drinking. Alcohol really sucks!

                          [MENTION=24196]Rava[/MENTION]....sorry that you drank last night, and I have to admit that I did as well. Someone here mentioned the craving for alcohol as being visceral at times which is spot on! I've been experiencing these intense yearnings for booze, which last all day. The Rose colored glasses came out, but as usual, they lied to me again. Ironically, I had a dream last night in which I started smoking again and it's been 3 months since I quit. Not sure which is worse.

                          [MENTION=19596]Slo[/MENTION].. Where do you get magnesium spray? The pain in my shoulder have been keeping me up at night, and I was wondering if it would help?

                          Thanks for today's quote dill...I really needed that!


                          Humbly asking for 24 hours and thank you!

                          Comment


                            5:45am in Alberta, 24 more for me please, and thanks...

                            -3C (27F) this morning, one good thing about Bubba being in Veg, my truck gets the garage and there's no scraping frost off the windows!

                            In the past 24 hours, these people have signed in for 24 hours of sobriety:
                            [MENTION=7944]dill[/MENTION] [MENTION=17632]Mr Vervill[/MENTION] [MENTION=24080]Jude58[/MENTION] [MENTION=20929]Ginger999[/MENTION] [MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION] [MENTION=19596]Slo[/MENTION] [MENTION=22409]Quit wining[/MENTION] [MENTION=24196]Rava[/MENTION] abcowboy


                            Today is going to be a darn good day not to drink!
                            Quitting and staying quit isn't easy, its learning a whole new way of thinking. It's accepting a new way of life, and not just accepting it, embracing it...
                            Worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. Just get through today. Tomorrow will look after itself when it becomes today, because today is all we have to think about.
                            Friendship is not about how many friends you have or who you've known the longest. It's about who walked into your life, said "I'm here for you", and proved it.

                            Comment


                              Re: ~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

                              Such a true quote! Sorry for all the slippery slopes here lately. Bottom line, staying close gets us back here. Everyone of us that has ever slipped has quickly known that it was a mistake and is the same poison it always was. How long we hang out with that evil liquid is up to us. So dust yourself off and get back on that sober horse! Love you guys <3

                              I'll take another 24, please and thank you!
                              Last edited by Ginger999; November 19, 2019, 08:34 AM.

                              Comment


                                Re: ~cattleman cafe~ &amp; another 24...

                                I need that quote today, Dill. I need to put much more practice into staying out of a negative head space. So what if HB is dissing my relatives yet again (“I don’t really like THOSE people”), refusing to visit because a sports game came up, and trying to draw young daughter away from our plans to visit for the surprise birthday party to go to the game with him instead? Is there anything new about this behavior? NO! This is status quo for the past 33 years, so why dwell on it?! I’m only hurting myself.

                                I think Mr. V had his antenna up about you the other day, Rava. Well, a slip is usually followed by a big blowout in my experience, so NOW you can put it behind you and move on.

                                The magnesium spray that I’m using I got from Amazon: Ease spray from a Canadian company called Activation. The tip I got from my vit. A toxicity website is that you can spray it right onto achy joints that are hurting. Sorry that you drank, Jude, but if you can get better sleep and less pain than it should make it less likely for alcohol to start calling to you.

                                I misunderstood too that it was the ex-DIL saying that she didn’t want their daughter at your son’s, Ginger. Well, so it’s not her manipulating the situation. Good for your granddaughter for speaking up. It might just be the prompt that he needs!

                                Hi, [MENTION=9757]NoraC[/MENTION]! Hope things are pretty well with you. Hope your boss is behaving, and your mom is stable and getting extra help from hospice.

                                Requesting 24 hours AF please!
                                Last edited by Slo; November 20, 2019, 02:37 PM.
                                Once a pickle, never a cucumber again.

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