Army Ring in the New Year!!

[byebyebridgetjones]

I understand that there is a certain squirrelly arse that needs bootin' back in line?
No beating self up Starty. It's useless.
The only crime is to not get back on that horse for another go.

[starty]

So much wise, sensible and supportive advice her. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

I am so glad I posted and didn't hide away. I think that is crucial and provides a large dose of self realisation.

Molly posted a great article of FB regarding depression

Why Sugar Is Dangerous To Depression | World of Psychology

I am prone to depression. I think most addicts are, and if we are sensitive to other factors like diet as well this can easily tip us over the edge. Coupled with extended "celebrations" and being with others who do not have a healthy relationship with AL (my colleagues)

I KNOW that this is not the way I want to live my life. And I NEVER want to go through withdrawals like I have been through for drink and drugs again.

[starty]

Starty, one of my "rules" was that I had to come on MWO and post my intentions b/f I drank. I figured if an online forum was my only source of support, I'd better use it! Just the pause taken to write it out was usually enough and then, given that someone almost always is online, I got responses reminding me why I'm here in the first place. You don't have to fight those feelings alone - share them with people who know exactly what you're talking about.

Did you have many false starts NS? Did it stop you from picking up or limit the damage?

[starty]

Plus the small things, Roxy said something the other day, She would be too afraid to take a drink now - that did hit me, she's right, I dont know where that would end.
Posts from new people really help too cos they are often full of the pain (a reminder) and hope. Molly was great here there other day, as were others..

Yes, this post about drinking patterns really resonates with me. I don't get rip roaring drunk either just continually top up to take any rough edges off. The fear factor is creeping in too. and each time we fall the quantities increase to very dangerous levels e.g. a whole bottle of spirits. That is frightening

[starty]

If it is any consolation Starty I was a whisker away from drinking yesterday!

Every xmas it hits me in the new year that I REALLY want a drink. I even told my son yesterday how much I wanted to get drunk.

I think it is the relief of surviving the drinking fest!

Don't sweat it... it is only something if you think it is!

Really Kuya? That was exactly me too! Got through Christmas and the relief tipped me over the edge! We really are all the same aren't we? Yet we all think we are alone in these thoughts.

[Mick]

If it is any consolation Starty I was a whisker away from drinking yesterday!

Every xmas it hits me in the new year that I REALLY want a drink. I even told my son yesterday how much I wanted to get drunk.

I think it is the relief of surviving the drinking fest!

Don't sweat it... it is only something if you think it is!

hey well done you ..you are right...its a thought thats all...you are only a shoplifter when you nick it ..not when you look!!

[peppersnow]

The deprivation thoughts have been awful so I think it might be something physical that is keeping me craving, I heard that sugar doesn't help so lets see if it makes a difference

I will have a look see if I can find it

Hey there -- someone may have already said this, but L-Glutamine is wonderful for sugar cravings! I cut out sugar last summer and it was tough at first, until I remembered how helpful L-Glut was the first few months of my AL quit. After all, alcohol is pure sugar... I started taking L-Glut again and quitting sugar was SO much easier. Just wanted to share that in case it hasn't come up. Good luck!:happy2:

I mean good luck with quitting sugar, if that's what you decide to do!

[starty]

Hey there -- someone may have already said this, but L-Glutamine is wonderful for sugar cravings! I cut out sugar last summer and it was tough at first, until I remembered how helpful L-Glut was the first few months of my AL quit. After all, alcohol is pure sugar... I started taking L-Glut again and quitting sugar was SO much easier. Just wanted to share that in case it hasn't come up. Good luck!:happy2:

I mean good luck with quitting sugar, if that's what you decide to do!

Thank you for the reminder! I do have a big bag of it but had forgotten about it. How much should I take? And did you have it directly on your tongue or dissolve it?

[Guitarista]

Glad you're back here and yapping about it Starty. I reckon you're doing great. :hug:

[starty]

Morning Molls. Yes I must confess I wasn't prepared in any way shape or form. Stupid when I had so many years of sobriety previously.

Another interesting article

Blog — HIP SOBRIETY

[sunbird2]

Morning all,

Its strange how the fears start taking a strangle hold on us once we have had a slip. I think its because we lose faith and trustin ourselves...and to ourselves we have undermined our own credibility.

[starty]

Morning all,

Its strange how the fears start taking a strangle hold on us once we have had a slip. I think its because we lose faith and trustin ourselves...and to ourselves we have undermined our own credibility.

I agree. I don't trust myself at all anymore. Or the power of my brain to "justify" my actions

[satz123]

Hey Startypants welcome back:hug:
I had a few false starts but I found with each one I didn't 'enjoy' it as much as I used to.
The brainwashing had worked and it wasn't worth it. I'd tasted sober life & it was what I wanted.
But that's just me.
How did you feel while drinking? Did it feel as good or just something you'd started and then needed to see through ?

[starty]

Hey Startypants welcome back:hug:
I had a few false starts but I found with each one I didn't 'enjoy' it as much as I used to.
The brainwashing had worked and it wasn't worth it. I'd tasted sober life & it was what I wanted.
But that's just me.
How did you feel while drinking? Did it feel as good or just something you'd started and then needed to see through ?

Thanks Satz. I KNOW how I want my life to be and I know for sure it is a sober one. Although I did enjoy the drink it will and already has taken over the last few days. I drink from morning to night given the opportunity and it would simply ruin my life The depression would set in and I would be lost. I know for a fact that is what would happen. As ever the first one felt good, then the others are purely because I had given myself permission to do it. Funnily enough, the obsession is back immediately

[starty]

jaysus my last post read like I was drunk :congratulatory:
I read that blog Starty and it made so much sense -- and definitely am gonna re-read and apply quite a few bits to myself however like Babes says......



for ME -- I think (and I don't think I'm being deluded) it is not a trigger -- maybe some form of a substitute - in that - like in that article I never ate sweet things when I drank and now I do -- it's not 'filling a gap' as such tho - because if there was a 'gap' I'd need to worry about it -- it's a treat - it's laziness - it's mostly something I do with quite an element of control and that feels good -- and YES without a doubt I will eat that 3rd or 4th Butlers choc from the box when I really only wanted one or two (sound familiar?) - crikey --- I sound like I'm justifying it..... but if I DID think in anyway it was a trigger for cravings for alcohol it would be gone in a flash --- just GONE --- there are HEAPS of smashing foods -- we don't have to live on spinach and kale -- so yeah -- if that's how you feel you should go for it alright --

how are you feeling today Starty? have you drink or anything else in the house? do you feel confident or what are your thoughts?

I think you have been sober long enough to know that it doesn't trigger. For me I was not sober long enough this time and I really do believe it affects my mood. I have always been sensitive to foods with an awful lot of allergies,. I am mentally and physically stronger when I look after my body and mind

There is some drink left which will be gone today. I do feel confident because I know what I don't want. What worries me is how my mind can change in an instant. I need to think of strategies to keep me focussed.