One Step at a Time - January 2016

[Lizann]

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[Rusty]

Liz:hug::love:Thanks for sharing your stories with me...I can see why you might feel a little melancholy as your parents were sharing their histories with you and Mark. Sending lots of hugs your way....and little Lucy...she is just so squeezably cute..if you can't find her....it's because she's sitting on my lap. LOL.

How did my family know I was drinking...that's easy to answer. On the weekends when I drank, as my drinking progressed from wine to liquor, I would get drunk and call my mother, sister or brother...usually whining about something that happened 30 years before, and then not remember I called. I would show up LATE for family events, and when I did show up, it was obvious that I had been drinking. Of course, I reeked of booze and my eyes would be bloodshot...and I had the face of a pumpkin....totally puffed out. That hungover, puffed out face is on my driver's license. (CRINGE). Even though it's expired...I keep it in my wallet and I look at it. It's a very effective reminder.

[mama bear]

Rusty, my love, good to see you and as always you write such beautiful posts and share so many interesting stories that are thought provoking.
Lizz- I m very curious about your parent's story if you are comfortable sharing. It may help you to talk to us...or not. Much love and support and Lucy is adorable.
Nora - your DIL is lucky to have you. You are so gentle and nurturing. Just don't take on too much, ok?
Between Scott and Casey and your Mom your plate is overflowing.
BExcellent job on 14 days Bac!!
Back to cleaning.
I love you all
I have texted and called K9 at least 10 times and it does not say the number is disconnected.

[mama bear]

Thinking of you Skwerly Butt.

[NoraC]

Hello my friends. I will post when I turn on my computer. But, wanted to check in. Lazy day and I need to get up and do something. Clean out the fridge for one. Yu c k! I'll be back.

[fennel]

I tried to sleep in today, to no avail. The cats could sense I was awake and began meowing outside my door to feed them, so I did that.

Mama, I love how you call me "skwerly-butt", LOL! I'm thinking of you, too. I am glad that Grant is staying off the weed. It might not take a whole year for him, though...maybe he should purchase a drug test from the drug store and test himself in 3 months or so. I was so terrified that all my second hand exposure to weed would skew my drug tests, but I passed all of them.

I really miss K9, too...remember "Diablo Stole My Shoes" as her autobiography title? I really hope she is okay.

Liz, Lucy is so cute!

Rusty, what an awful story Sue had...just scary what alcohol does to people. That's sad about the Engineering Manager. He could be drinking, but he could also just be lazy or not that bright.

Nora, I hope you folks find a venue for the wedding celebration! How are you feeling?

I'm enjoying my weekend, but I need to find some friends to do things with on the weekend. My sister wives just sit at home and are not very active. I go to the gym, but I'm not really making friends there. Our temps are going to plummet to a scant 4 above on Monday. I dread getting in my car to go to work!

Hi, Pauly...how goes it?

Hiya, bacman.

[Lizann]

Good evening guys. Went to the movies with the boys today. They wanted to see 13 hours,so I tagged along. It was intense! I had my eyes covered for a portion of it. It was good though. Had to do with the attack on the embassy in Benghazi.
Mama,I don't mind sharing at all. My parents both lived in what is present day Poland but was Germany during the war. The Russians overtook the area and they had to leave their homes and everything. They were refugees. My mom was 12 and dad was 14. My father was captured by the Russians twice, and twice escaped. Mom wasn't too graphic, but dad was. Mom says suffice it to say, what she saw was horrific. It was a war zone. She says dad still has nightmares. It was just their personal journeys through the war. How they were reunited with their respective families after. My kids find this so interesting and they wanted their autobiographies.
I think skwerly butt is so cute too. Fen Lucy stares at me in the morning to see if I'm awake. She scratches my pillow to wake me. She's getting so set in her ways as she is getting older.

[Rusty]

Good Morning, Friends!

Liz-wow, your parents are true SURVIVORS and must be incredibly strong people, not to mention courageous! Thank you for sharing their story with us, and I admire Mark for truly showing an interest in their lives and how their horrific childhoods did not prevent them from turning out to be successful parents (they had you, didn't they? ;-) )

Fenny-I KNEW I had forgotten someone when I posted the last time, and when it dawned on me that it was you, I was already out the door to my friend's house. So sorry! :-( I so understand how you would like to be active on the weekends and would love to share those activities with someone. Have you ever tried meetup.com? Someone on the Army Thread (I think it was Mollyka or Satz123) suggested it to another member several years ago. I am so happy you like your job...you deserve to be happy...you're such a kind, gentle soul.

Mama:love: I hope your son gets into the fire academy. I will send positive energy your way.

Nora-you shopping for a mother of the groom dress? I am glad the wedding gives you something to look forward to...considering all the stress you've been under the last several months. I hope you have a relaxing day.

Baclofenman-I have been reading your posts on the Meds Threads. I found "Sweet Success With Baclofen." I hit my switch dose at 90 mgs, and I still take 20 mgs per day and have been on 20 mgs since 2011. I think it was you who copied and pasted Otter's post yesterday where he talked about how Baclofen was effective in lessening his anxiety. I have the same issue, from which I have suffered since I was 4 years old. Baclofen was absolutely effective in zapping that compulsive urge to drink when my anxiety level was off the charts. I found NAL and BAC to be the most effective tools in managing my AL problem. The NAL helped mitigate the lure of the after work "witching hour" because when I took it, it made me very nauseous, along with changing my workout routine from morning to early evening. When I get back from the gym at night, I don't feel like drinking or eating...all I want to do is take a shower and go to bed. I also lurk on the Meds Threads because I am very fond of a few people there, mainly Sunshinedaisies and Neva Eva. I just WISH I had actively read the posts on the Meds threads earlier than 2010. Honestly, I had this preconceived idea that I had to have a prescription from my doctor to get on BAC and NAL...and I was so wrong! All my doctor knew was AA and Rehab. Um, not going there for sure!!

I just wanted to give all of you a heads up. I have a new computer, and I've upgraded to Windows 10, and all my of my PMs look like this:

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So if any of you want to communicate privately with me, please PM me your email address.
A warm shoutout and hugs to Sunshinedaisies, Samstone, Mr. G (ooohhhh...I still have naughty thoughts about you ;-0) ), Red67 and anyone I have missed.

I hope everyone has a relaxing Sunday!

[mama bear]

Hi Peeps. Bret and I snuggled all day and watched Nurse Jackie and the switched to The Martian on Uverse. It was very intense and superb. I like watching the Oscar nominees.
Date night was fun. We met with some friends of Brian, the man that died the day after Christmas and talked. I had three beers, which is really good for me. I was very conscious of my consumption, so I guess that is good.
Off to Nana's...

[Lizann]

Hey guys. Sounds like a nice day mama.
Rusty what is the difference between Nal and Bac? Are they used for the same purpose? I tried to do some research on line and found Bac was used for MS? I don't know.
It snowed today. Probably not going to stick but glad to not have anywhere to go. Mark and I work on translating moms biography as it was written in German. We got about half way through. Now I'm just enjoying some football. I love Sundays in January!

[NoraC]

Hello all

Rusty – good to hear from you. Thank you for sharing your story. I didn’t realize that you used Bac, I knew that you had used Nal. I think your success story is great!

Mama – Glad that you had fun at date night. And, that you had fun cuddling today. Is Grant ok with you having a few beers? You had mentioned that you guys had made a deal or bet or something. I don’t quite remember what you said.

Hi Heds - :checkin:

Liz – I’ll have to look up 13 hours. Haven’t heard of it. Lucy is an absolute doll. What a cutie pie. That had to have been so hard to listen to your parents talk. Thank you for sharing.

Pauly – what are you up to today? Babysitting? Nice that you decorated for valentine’s day.

Fen – I can’t see a squirrel without thinking of skwerly-butt. LOL I don’t remember Diablo Stole my Shoes. I tried to look it up but couldn’t find it. I hope that you can find some friends to do things with. Maybe you can drag B&A out one weekend and have them around while you try to meet up with people.

Bac – what were you up to this weekend? Breaking Bad is really great but I've been in the mood for comedy. I think Parks & Recreation is funny. I liked 30 Rock but done with that. We had been watching Orange is the New Black but some of it is pretty graphic when my 88 year old Mom is in here. She can't hear it but she can see it. :rotlf: I can't wait for the next season of Grace & Frankie to come out.

Yesterday, son & I were talking about the wedding reception. They have picked the restaurant and they were talking about buying a case of wine and just paying the corkage fee. He was talking about the fact that some people wouldn’t be drinking and I told him that I wouldn’t be. Then I said that I didn’t imagine that his Dad would be drinking either. And, then I told him that I wouldn’t be toasting him with the champagne for the toast but I’d toast him with water. Then I told him that it was almost 6 months and wasn’t he happy for me. So, I’m relieved that I brought it up. It’s no big deal.

[mama bear]

Just lost an epic post.....to recap I wanted to apologize to you Lizz, that I did not mention your parents story. It is amazing and gruesome, and I think it's sweet that you are documenting it.
Nora - I am being honest with Grant when I drink. At first he was mad, but I explained that I am really trying and consciously cutting back. I also told him he is better than dealing with addiction than I am and I am proud of him. he seems ok so far.
Another Sunday night with everyone drinking but me!
Hope you get some sleep Skwerly Butt!
xo...night

[Lizann]

Mama, no reason to apologize. I was kinda of down last week and that's why. I'm glad your son is ok with it after you explained things to him. You guys all know how my son feels!
Nora glad you had a talk with your son too. I'm sure he realizes it ain't easy not drinking! I'm sure the wedding will be lovely especially because you won't be drinking. Are you worried you might be tempted?

[Rusty]

Good Morning, Friends and A Quick Check-In From Me:

Liz-NAL works on cravings and rewires your brain to mitigate the feelings of getting a good buzz one would get when they drink.
Baclofen has many positive characteristics but for me and many others, it mitigates severe anxiety, which is a reason a lot of people turn to booze for a coping mechanism. I was very much a moderate and social drinker until the last 6 years I was in the automotive industry. I had a very stressful job, was traveling a lot internationally, all different kinds of time zones and difficult clients. I drank socially when out with my friends or family but on the weekends I would use it to numb the horrible anxiety I felt about starting another work week. Additionally, I used booze to deal with the horrible emptiness I felt after the deaths of my best friend, my father, brother, and the break-up of a long-term relationship. The Meds Threads have excellent information on both NAL and Bac. I've been on Bac since 2010.

Nora-almost 6 months AF? That is amazing!!! Congratulations! Congratulations also on being honest with your son and telling him you and your husband would not be drinking at the wedding reception.

Big hellos to everyone else...I have a boatload of work to do before I leave for Atlanta, and I was a bad girl yesterday. I blew off my paperwork and immersed myself in football. Like Liz, I love football in January. :-)

Have a great Monday, everyone!

[Rusty]

Mama-I think you're managing your addiction just fine. Grant has to quit the weed because he has no chance of getting the career he wants if he doesn't and he won't be able to hang onto that career if he is even dabbling in it because believe me, police and fire departments are doing random drug checks much more than they ever used to in the past.